How to be a good mother? As a mother, you should have three magic weapons: lead by example, have principles and work hard. Set up a banner for children to learn and become a really sensible boy. Mothers are the best educators, and as leaders of children, they need to set an example. In the process of accompanying children to grow up, mothers can accompany their children to learn things, act as their friends and enrich their lives. For example, when children are studying, mothers can read their own professional books beside them. Don't let the children have pressure, encourage and affirm at any time.
In the process of educating her daughter, Ms. Chen adheres to the educational concept and principle of "love and freedom" because what she lacked from childhood was "love and freedom". When I was a child, Ms. Chen's mother was very strict with them and never made any intimate moves to express her love for them. Ms. Chen and her lover are both graduate students from CUHK. In their view, under normal circumstances, their daughter will not be a poor student, and their expectations for her are not particularly great. They think that as long as she is physically and mentally healthy and happy, it is enough. "We don't want her to get ahead in the future, so the children are under great pressure, and we parents are also very painful.
Mothers should carry forward the industrious spirit of China people, care for their children and strive to build a full life for themselves. How to be a good mother? Mothers should be diligent in front of their children and set a good image for them. When children are doing their homework, don't watch TV, play computer or play mahjong, which will make them lose the habit of studying hard. Only by correcting yourself and guiding children can children really devote themselves to learning. Therefore, cultivating children's fighting spirit is the wealth that mothers bring to their children.
How to be a good mother? Many parents do not lack the knowledge and ideas of family education, but practice and how to apply these ideas to practice. Ms. Chen has been engaged in preschool education. She believes that a mother's nature is to protect her children. "But this kind of protection is too easy, and many times my mother is not willing to let go. When the child falls, the mother's physiological reaction must be very distressed. The instinctive reaction is to help the child up and check whether the child is injured. However, if the child falls down every time, the mother will help him get up. Every time a child encounters difficulties, the mother will lend a helping hand at the first time. Children will unconsciously develop the habit of relying on their parents and cannot be independent as soon as possible. " Ms. Chen recalled that her daughter often wrestled when she first learned to walk. "I don't want to mention how distressed I am when I see my daughter wrestling, but reason tells me that I must overcome this physiological reaction, let go and let the children get up by themselves." Under Ms. Chen's "cruel heart", her daughter quickly learned to walk and was very independent from an early age. If the mother helps the child to get up every time he falls, the mother will lend a helping hand at the first time every time the child encounters difficulties, and the child will unconsciously develop the habit of relying on his parents and cannot be independent as soon as possible.
Touching moment: another person to rely on.
Recently, Ms. Chen fell ill under the pressure of busy work. She is lying at home with a high fever. Seeing her mother's uncomfortable appearance, her daughter asked her about her illness with great concern, covered her with a quilt, printed a kiss on her forehead and said, "Mom will be fine if she has more rest." "Ms. Chen was particularly moved to see her daughter so sensible." Suddenly I feel that my daughter is very caring. I feel that my efforts to her over the past few years have not been in vain. I used to think that my lover was the only person I could rely on, but now I suddenly feel that I have a daughter to rely on. How can I be a good mother?
Here are some things that are most needed to educate children:
(A) to cultivate their love
It is necessary for mothers to explain to their children that being kind and polite to others is as important as academic Excellence. Those children who are emotionally cultivated often have outstanding emotional IQ, and they have a high ability to coordinate their own needs with those of others. Such people are more likely to be far ahead in life. A series of investigations by Bell Laboratories show that engineers with rich achievements often have the highest EQ, not IQ.
Mothers usually need to cultivate their children's friendship skills. A friend said that he had difficulty making friends when he was a child. At that time, a teammate was injured, and my friend's mother insisted that he make a phone call and ask the boy how he felt. "Mom," he objected, "he doesn't even know who I am." "He will know." His mother replied. This phone call marks the beginning of close friendship. My mother taught me that friendship stems from your concern for others, not asking others to show concern for you.
(b) More praise and encouragement.
We all know that praise can make people work miracles, and too much criticism will lead children to blame themselves and let them take some risks for success.
There are right and wrong ways to praise. Most parents can count carefully when criticizing their children, but they are vague when praising their children-"You are a great child" will make the temporary glory disappear in an instant. So Yang should be more specific and say "you are brave" instead of "I am proud that you climbed into the car after falling." This clearly explains why this behavior is commendable.
Everyone has a "key area", once praised, it will receive unexpected results. As a mother, you probably know better than anyone what is important to your children-perhaps music, sports or a certain course. If you don't know, there is nothing wrong with asking.
Secondly, because children can only absorb limited praise at a time, the number of giving some praise is small and the number of times is high. A hundred encouragements a minute is better than a hundred praises.
(3) Talking about "taboo"
We live in a dangerous world. In this world, children are exposed to drugs, alcohol and sex. Some mothers worry that talking about such taboo behaviors is encouraging them to do so. But the opposite is true. The survey found that children who have talked frankly with their parents are less likely to take drugs and drink alcohol.
Mothers can especially talk about these sensitive topics skillfully with their children. Let yourself know about these phenomena first, and then ask the children what they know. Children aged six or seven may have heard such things on the playground or seen them on TV. Point out that you talk to them about this kind of thing to let them know the danger, not to distrust them, and to let them know that you are willing to answer any questions or talk to them about their troubles.
(4) appropriately relax the boundaries.
Children need unconditional love, so that the seeds of self-esteem and self-love can grow. This unconditional love doesn't mean that you don't set any boundaries. Setting boundaries is to let children know that he is important to you. When children cross the line, explain to them that you are disappointed in this behavior, not in them.
As children grow up, the boundaries will naturally be relaxed. Especially boys, they want to keep a certain distance from their mothers. Psychologist Ivanso Besso once wrote: When boys meet toy trucks for the first time, the roar of cars begins in their hearts, which is innate. They want to take risks and show the strength of men they have seen. As boys grow up, their boundaries should be appropriately relaxed. A mother should not feel abandoned or weak.
Mothers are a great source of encouragement for children. Psychologist Eton Chase surveyed 250 school-age children and found that nearly half of them wanted to be mothers, not fathers. Bezo speculated that one of the reasons is that children want to know more about their mother's work and visit their mother's workplace.
(5) indicate the direction.
Children need a moral compass. This means instilling the concept of right and wrong not only on major issues, but also on daily trivia.
A mother saw her five-year-old son riding his friend's neighbor's seven-year-old boy. "Qiqi doesn't need this car," said his son. "He is at school." He thinks there is nothing wrong with doing so, because his friends won't mind. But the mother insisted that her son take the car back: "It is wrong to use other people's property without permission." When a mother pays enough attention to the cultivation of her children's sense of responsibility, integrity and loyalty, the value system they have established for their children will become priceless. The best moral guidance is the mother's own behavior. If the mother shirks her responsibility, ignores the rights of others, or reneges, the child will lose the guidance of behavior. You may not want to hear the words, "But, Mom, that's what you did."
(6) play with children.
In a very short period of time, mothers usually pay attention to the so-called important things-catching their children and helping them with their homework. However, in our fast-paced society, children are eager for more than that. They want to spend good time with their mothers.
It doesn't take much time, as long as you have a playful attitude, an attitude that is willing to turn homework time into fun or turn housework into games.
A friend lets her children play with their friends in the kitchen. Toys, paints and dirt fly into the food from time to time. A few years later, her son who went to college took an old friend home for dinner.
"I always thought it would be great to go to your house," said my friend. "We used to laugh here-toys fell into the soup." Being a mother is a responsible job, but it doesn't mean it is a burden. Sometimes you need less responsibility-never mind what you ask of yourself and play with your children.
How to be a good mother? In most families, mothers play a major role in helping children solve difficulties in life. However, children need different things. A mother must consider what her child really needs.