Does my child have ADHD? Always moving, not paying attention in kindergarten class, and teachers always complaining ... If this goes on, there will be more problems in primary school!

My children always procrastinate. Playing while doing homework is inefficient. It doesn't matter if you are scolded. Primary schools don't like studying. What should I do in the future?

The child is in the big class and doesn't want to write. As soon as he did his homework, he said, "Mom, I can't. Please help me.". He is very dependent on me and clingy. The little boy is so independent that going to school in the future is his own business!

……

Dear parents:

The anxiety of 20 17 is coming to an end. Will the anxiety of 20 18 come more violently?

In family education in China, the most important role played by parents is to strive for the best teaching resources for their children. In family education, school education and social education, we rely more on school education, thinking that grades are the most important thing, and the most important thing is of course to go all out! In the jungle society, our parents will clear the way for their children's future from the moment their children are born, from asking for a new moon and attending an early education interest class to buying a school district and entering a prestigious school. Inheriting the wind is really pitiful.

Today, there is a saying still hanging on the lips of many parents-"Son, I don't need you to do anything, you just need to study hard." I can understand my parents' feelings and feelings. The question is, can children learn well by doing nothing?

Here, I want to tell parents that the task of learning is really arduous for children, because its completion needs the support of various abilities, not that we don't want children to do anything, they just need to learn.

So how to treat children's learning to change the old parent-child interaction model?

00 1

First of all, as parents, we need to know: in fact, children are learning from birth, but the forms of learning are different at each age. Children aged 0-6 learn through various senses (eyes, mouth, nose, ears and other parts of the body). Driven by curiosity, children experience in play (playing with water, playing with toys, sliding on the slide, running, observing bugs, etc.). ) and then have their own cognition. This is the child's initial learning-knowing his own learning.

Sun Ruixue, an expert in children's education, called this stage "the construction of life system". I call it "basic construction learning" for children. In this infrastructure, children begin to build their own abilities of concentration, independence, autonomy, self-confidence, emotional adjustment, self-control and self-discipline, and problem solving. Although the construction of these functions has not been completed, each function has its own original interface and its own architecture.

002

Secondly, children aged 6- 12 begin to learn in a complicated way in primary school, and their physical experience transits to the cognition of brain science and enters the social system. I call this period the "building floor construction" period. At this time, children will practice their understanding of themselves and renew their understanding in a more complicated school environment (complex learning tasks, diversified interpersonal relationships, and changes in external requirements for children). In other words, children begin to learn at school, and to complete this task, the foundation construction part should start to support the construction part of the building floor. Children's internal cognition should be related to social rules. When the interface was first built, it was easy to connect, showing good learning effect and high grades. On the contrary, it is difficult, which is manifested in many conflicts and behavioral obstacles.

A popular understanding is that when children encounter learning tasks, they have not built original interfaces such as autonomy, independence and concentration before. Without the support of these abilities, the task of learning will be more arduous and it will be difficult for children to complete it smoothly. What they show is that they don't like poor academic performance. Therefore, children learning this matter actually need a lot of ability to support it!

003

Thirdly, the learning task in primary school is actually to polish and consolidate the children's "basic part" ability again. If there are too many learning disabilities at this stage, it means that the child's "basic part" itself has problems, so it must be made up at the primary school stage. That is to say, if there is a problem with independent ability, it is necessary to make up for the sense of security, unconditional love, and change the educational model of drowning love. This raises a very realistic question: primary school homework should not be too heavy, otherwise the ability of the basic part will not be compensated, which means why European and American schools are more relaxed and happy in primary school and their junior high school studies will increase. Even so, because of all the abilities, children have enough pressure resistance, so they can afford it completely.

So learning this task needs a lot of other abilities to support it. Then will you still say to your child, "You don't have to do anything, just study hard"? Will you just try your best to give your children advanced learning in Olympic Mathematics? Will you still force your children to prepare for the English certificate exam? If the "infrastructure" is not completed, all buildings on the ground will be a mirage in children's lives!