A few days ago, I heard from a friend that at a family gathering, adults joked about their son: mom and dad didn't want him, which made him cry for a long time.

After a long time, children follow their parents like followers. I'm afraid they'll leave, so I won't come back.

Until she and her husband reluctantly promised in front of the children: we will not abandon the baby. The child just laughed happily.

Adler, the originator of children's psychology, once said: children's perception ability is strong, but their ability to interpret the world is not enough. ?

Adults often think that children are too young to remember, but they are not good at expressing themselves.

Children's world is often very simple, and they generally believe what they see and hear intuitively. Therefore, in parenting education, parents should not be cynical.

Essentially, parents want to pass? Irony? Play an educational role, but we need to grasp the scale.

Children experts believe that children aged 2-5 are in a critical period of language and logical thinking development. Although their vocabulary has developed by leaps and bounds, their understanding of semantics and meanings is still developing, so it is easy to misinterpret some ambiguous words.

To put it simply, children's thinking is very simple, they have a superficial understanding of what adults say, and they can't see the essence through phenomena.

Or, parents? Pun? Children don't have concepts in their minds, and naturally they can't understand the deep meaning behind them.

The frequent satire of parents will confuse children, and the continuous development is very unfavorable to the communication between parents and children.

Irony? If used well, it can play a very good role in children's education.

But if you don't master the scale carefully, it may hurt your child's heart and even become more rebellious, forming a wrong view of right and wrong.

When joking or saying irony with children, you must think twice before you act.

03 parents' longest irony:

One. ? You are not good, I don't like you?

The child and his mother watched the movie "Lonely" starring Andy Lau together, and suddenly asked: Mom, will you be very sad if I get lost?

Mother watched TV and casually replied: I won't be sad, I will regenerate a better one.

After listening, my son was silent.

After a long time, my son is very nervous and likes to hide in the corner and be unhappy.

This state lasted for two weeks, until the mother reacted and took the initiative to communicate with her, and her son's mood gradually calmed down.

Sometimes, satire between adults can play a better role.

For example, a husband flatters his wife: I'll buy you a necklace. And the wife said angrily, go, who wants your necklace?

Such a context is developing in the direction of a good relationship between two people.

But if the child can't understand the irony of adults, he will really think that his mother doesn't love him and doesn't want him, then his heart will become very broken.

Two? Is my child stupid?

Children go out with adults and are praised as smart and cute.

At this time, some parents will naturally answer: What are you smart about? My child is so stupid.

What seems to be simple courtesy with others, perhaps modest, has turned into a denial of children's cognition.

The child can't help but ask in his heart: am I stupid?

Many times, parents' casual pleasantries will brand children's little hearts with negative emotions.

The saddest thing is that if children are unresponsive to this kind of words and become accustomed to it, then parents will have a sense of crisis.

Children don't care about appearance, and what is in their hearts may not be expressed.

Children also have self-esteem and hope to be recognized and rewarded by their parents. If they always live under negative evaluation, they will inevitably misunderstand themselves.

04? Irony? It is the biggest harm that parents do to their children.

Language experts say: Irony is actually a disguised form of language violence and an expression of emotions. Often like a sword, it stings children's hearts and hinders the development of parent-child relationship.

In the eyes of parents, what do children sometimes do? Stupid? This is a lovely mistake.

My aunt often complains to me that my cousin is not close to her. She thinks that people's little cotton-padded jackets are very intimate, and her daughter doesn't call to say hello for months.

Actually, it's not that my cousin is inconsiderate, but that I don't know how to communicate with menstruation.

▼ The gap between menstruation and her cousin has been accumulated since childhood.

When I was a child, my cousin was naughty and lively, and often wanted to try to do all kinds of housework.

But my cousin always has various problems, such as accidentally breaking the bowl when washing dishes, cleaning the room but getting covered in dust, cleaning the room but rummaging through the closet and littering the floor.

Often at this time, menstruation will say half-seriously and half-jokingly, you idiot, the more you help, the more busy you are. Do you want to kill your mother?

In fact, aunt just wants her cousin to remember not to make trouble, but forgets that making trouble is a child's exploration of the world and ignores the original intention of her cousin to help her share.

Every time my aunt said this, my cousin would silently lower her head. After a long time, my cousin gradually doesn't like making trouble, but she doesn't like talking to her aunt either.

So, don't underestimate? Irony? The influence of.

Many times, the generation gap is so easy to produce. Parents'? Irony? Like a brush, draw one line after another in the child's heart, and finally form a profound self-denial.

In life, parents are used to using it? Little fool? Little fool? To address the children. It was originally a nickname, and the child's thinking is limited and he can't understand it.

If children can't understand your sarcasm, they will be hurt unintentionally.

Growing up in such an educational environment will habitually reflect inappropriate emotions when solving problems.

1. Satire is always harmful to children. Most people who have suffered from verbal violence have unhealthy psychological tendencies, ranging from social barriers to suicidal tendencies and even hurting others.

Children, like adults, fear recognition as much as they expect and question it.

The so-called negation, ridicule and rejection will lurk in their consciousness, and they may think of it at any time, accompanied by fear.

2. Its influence is no less than physical violence. Only a happy family can bring up a happy child. The source of children's inner security is actually the stability of family parent-child relationship.

For children, parents' words are authority.

Negative? Irony? The harm to the child is no less than physical violence, which will make him indulge in unhealthy mental state for a long time.

Parents should follow human nature education and use less provocation to belittle their children. The art of speaking is really important for raising children.

How to change it? Irony? Educational habits? One. ? Communicate with children in positive language.

If parents don't complain and don't have negative emotions, but learn to tap their children's progress and improvement, and communicate with their children in a positive and goodwill language, it is easy for children to cultivate self-confidence.

Like when a child says? I'm sorry, I didn't do it well? Parents shouldn't answer subconsciously? You can't do this well. Didn't you say you would succeed? ? Why don't you try telling your children? Never mind, then let's try again! ?

Two. ? Describe the problem with ... Give advice? Statement communication of solutions

Active communication with children is extremely important, and there is no lack of logic.

Even if the child is wrong and makes sense, follow the description. Give advice? The order of the solution helps the child to sort out the ins and outs of the whole thing.

This not only helps children understand, but also helps parents calm down.

For example, children play wildly outside and get their clothes dirty.

Mom can say this: I see your clothes are dirty, and they don't look good. I want to see you clean. Shall we take a bath together? ?

This is better than? How many times have I told you not to get your clothes dirty? Make the child sound much more comfortable.

Of course, the most important thing is to respect children. Please block yours? Irony education Give children a clearer and clearer growth guidance.