1, your child won the first place, which is the pride of the whole family; Son, you have worked so hard for so long, and you deserve it.

2. You finally finished your homework on time and continue tomorrow; You can finish it on time today, which is the result of your dedication.

3, you have reached these standards, which is great; Mom and dad know that you know what is best for you, and you have your own judgment.

The former is praise, pointing to the people who do things and recognizing the perfect result. In this way, children will change because of others, and children will rely more on the evaluation of others; The latter is encouraging and pointing behavior. In this way, children's efforts and improvement will be recognized, and children will change because of themselves, which can cultivate their self-confidence and self-reliance.

We can see that the results produced by using two different ways of encouragement and praise are completely different: encouragement will make children feel that' my result was achieved through a long process and is a result that I can control. As long as I work hard, I can't get it without working hard. Praise will make children feel that they must do better next time to get recognition from others.

How do parents judge "encouragement" and "praise"

Encouraging and inspiring children's courage to overcome difficulties is a trust in their own and others' abilities and an interest in others' views and their own. They are willing to take responsibility for problems, strive to improve, and do not pursue perfection, because perfection is extremely unrealistic expectation; Praise is only for promoting children's achievements or evaluating their achievements.

In addition, parents can tell whether they are encouraging or praising their children through the following four points.

1. Do I encourage children to evaluate themselves or rely on others' evaluation?

2. Am I respecting my children or putting on airs with my parents?

3. Did I see my child's point of view, or just my own?

4. Will I talk to my friends like this? It is very important whether you are on an equal footing with your children. )

Therefore, parents should give their children more encouragement from now on! Encourage children, and hope that children will find confidence, happiness and courage, and be able to face any setbacks and difficulties.