Not only the children of rich families have to be raised by the second generation, but also the children of poor families have to be raised by the second generation.
"No matter how poor you are, you can't be poor in education or suffer from children" has become the mainstream educational thought.
I agree with the first half of the sentence, but this poor is "poor" with quotation marks. In children's education, the time, thoughts, companionship and guidance invested by parents are the most precious wealth in the process of children's growth, and material investment only plays a icing on the cake.
Therefore, no matter how poor you are, education should be rich and full in spirit, and children should not become empty.
No matter how hard it is, you can't suffer the child. This is another matter. Some sufferings are meaningful for children's growth, while others are unnecessary.
▼/02
One is to train children's frustration ability, temper their will, simply and rudely strain their bones and muscles, and starve their bodies and skin. For example, let a 4-year-old child run away in the hot sun even if he has a rash.
In fact, this kind of suffering is meaningless to children. Children not only can't understand what persistence is and what is not afraid of difficulties, but also become distorted and lacking mentally, because in the case of physical fatigue and pain, children can't feel the so-called perseverance beyond the pain of the flesh and blood.
There is also suffering education, that is, blindly emphasizing diligence and studying hard with children, preferably in the way of learning like the ancients, but never teaching children the correct learning methods and skills, so that children fall into low-quality diligence, seemingly studying every day, but their grades are still not good.
For example, let children read books every day, don't play with any toys, and don't go outside to play with others. Do exercises, do papers, finish math and Chinese, finish Chinese and English, and then repeat. Children's brains need rest and relaxation.
Being in a state of tension all the time will not only fail to absorb knowledge, but also make children's psychological pressure increase sharply, which will only become more and more serious.
These pains only consume children's physical strength, which is a kind of pain that cuts the skin and is a low-quality pain. Such suffering has no value and is not good for children's health.
It will not temper the child's will, let alone make the child brave and tough, but will only bring about the constant loss and suppression of the body's will.
▼/03
So if you want pain, let the children bear those effective and valuable pains.
In middle school, there was a diligent girl in the class. Every day she gets up early, goes to the classroom to recite English words, and after class at night, everyone leaves. She continued reading with a flashlight. Anyway, she is studying and reading hard. We all thought that she worked hard, and the teacher praised her efforts.
But the result is that her English exam results are always unsatisfactory. Compared with the class ranking, we all thought she would be at the top of the class.
Nevertheless, she still feels that her memory is not strong enough, so she always recites words, makes test papers and even recites test papers. Because she is the representative of English class, she is often called by the teacher to help her correct her homework and test papers.
When I saw the girl's test paper, I found her mistakes very strange. The same knowledge, just change a question type or way, she will make mistakes, and more than once.
Therefore, instead of improving her grades, she studies hard at night every day, which makes her more and more depressed and her body more and more unbearable. Later, the teacher informed her that her parents would take her home to recuperate.
When I answered it that day, her mother seemed to blame her for how it got like this, how much homework she had to leave behind and how to make up it.
Is this suffering effective?
If she gets up early in the dark every day, she will spend more time thinking and studying how to make her study more efficient, how to master knowledge points more effectively, and sum up learning methods and ideas.
Apply it to daily study, and then summarize and reflect. According to this learning path, I think she will do well in the exam.
Suffering itself has no meaning, only feelings and thoughts after suffering.
▼/04
Probably this time can explain what a real rich boy is.
Abundance is neither continuous material satisfaction nor meaningless efforts. It is neither the kind of pampering and doting that would rather give children big fish and big meat, nor the kind of formalism that suffers for the sake of suffering.
The real enrichment is to let children face up to the sense of superiority and humiliation in the face of suffering and establish a set of far-sighted thinking mode and cognitive mode.
If children live in a wealthy family, they should be educated to be grateful, kind, not arrogant and not lazy, and strive to give full play to their own advantages, realize self-worth and bring greater value to others and society.
As the movie "Spider-Man" said: The greater the ability, the greater the responsibility.
If children live in poor families, parents will set a good example, teach their children to be self-reliant, neither humble nor supercilious, learn to think, learn to find ways, and work hard step by step according to the actual situation to realize their dreams.
And this process of self-realization is absolutely fruitful and rewarding for children.
In today's colorful society, it should be a basic psychological quality that every parent should teach their children not to be happy for things or sad for themselves.
This is also the basis for raising children.