High IQ does not mean high EQ. The essence of EQ is to manage one's emotions. When emotions are out of control, just like a wild horse out of control, there will be a situation in which sensibility overrides rationality and emotions are out of control. Think about when you argue with others, when you are ignored by your best friend, when your interests at work are damaged, what is your first reaction? You are angry, and then there are two endings. One is to vent your emotions regardless, and the other is to control your emotions, sort out the ins and outs, and strive for the best interests. Which way is better? Obviously, it is the latter. No one wants to be led by impulsive emotions all the time. People with high emotional intelligence know how to manage their emotions and make more informed decisions.
Why EQ is more important than IQ? Because EQ can make you know yourself better, get along with others better and realize your dreams better. Emotional intelligence can make you happier, healthier, more successful and happier. Emotional intelligence can make you more confident, attractive, influential and dignified. Emotional intelligence can make you more creative, smarter, more tasteful and more fashionable.
What impresses me most in daily life is that when your emotions prevail, your IQ is zero. So IQ becomes insignificant in the face of emotions. Only people with high emotional intelligence can better integrate their own advantages and create more personal value. IQ is to help you find the best solution to your problem, while EQ is to teach you how to use this method reasonably.
How to improve your emotional intelligence The first step is to understand your emotions. When emotions are about to erupt, you can jump out of the present to examine yourself and be aware of your emotional state like a bystander.
For example, in the workplace, there are often conflicts with colleagues because of interests. At this time, if you can control your emotions, don't do anything rash because of a temporary impulse, and you can also maintain a friendly relationship with your colleagues. In the process of getting along in the future, you can also use this relationship to create more favorable conditions for yourself. As the saying goes, looking to the future is the most basic way of life. Everyone has needs for others.
The second step is to cultivate empathy. Another manifestation of high emotional intelligence is to manage other people's emotions. If we do this, we can gain harmonious interpersonal relationships. Just like controlling your own emotions, managing others' emotions requires knowing others' emotions first, and then managing others' emotions well, which is inseparable from empathy.
Empathy is the ability to understand the feelings of others. To put it bluntly, it is the ability to empathize. When we feel our own feelings and those of others, the activities of the brain nervous system are almost the same. Using empathy, you can accurately grasp the psychology of others and keep your emotions consistent with others, so that others will listen to you.
Step three, don't criticize others easily. Admitting mistakes is a good thing, but after all, few people are willing to admit mistakes. From this, it is equivalent to proving that you want others to apologize, which is a very stupid thing. Don't criticize others easily, let alone force others to admit their mistakes.
Most people will have this habit, even if they are wrong, they will not easily admit their mistakes. Disciples' Rules says, "If people are uneasy, there is nothing to say." It means that when a person is impetuous, you should not tell him anything important, especially when a person is angry. Even if you are right, it is hard for her to listen. Because no one likes being considered a fool by others, because it is really a bad feeling, let alone being smarter than others.
In interpersonal communication, no matter how much you care about him, how much you love him, how kind and sincere you are to him, it is absolutely unacceptable and ungrateful to treat him blindly with accusations.
Accusing others of being wrong is actually denying others. Praise avoids this series of problems.
The fourth step is to really appreciate others. If you want to make a person full of enthusiasm, you must make him really feel important. The most profound driving force in human nature is "hope is very important".
We find that the more important a person is in an organization, the better his state will be, precisely because he firmly believes in his importance in the development of the organization. And if you want others to feel important and full of enthusiasm for their work, you must meet the most eager need in his human nature, that is, the desire to be affirmed. Appreciating others is easy for the person you like, but difficult for the person you don't like.
But in this world, everyone is his own champion, and everyone has his own specialty. If you can see him and really appreciate him, you will be the best witness in his brilliant life. No matter how knowledgeable the other person is, he won't like to associate with someone who is always concerned about his shortcomings, let alone regard him as a confidant and friend.
Longing for others' attention and hoping others feel important may be a major feature of human nature. Because, to satisfy other people's wishes, you only need to learn a little and really appreciate others.