Xiaosan is my friend and my best friend. We have known each other since we were very young.

Her academic performance has always been very good, always above me. My best achievement is only vomiting blood, and I try to rank seventh in a large class of more than 60 people. With hard work and amazing perseverance, she finally got a bachelor of arts degree in Baoji. I stumbled and regressed under the infinite self-relaxation. After graduating from technical secondary school, I took the self-taught exam. After nine courses, I gave up halfway for various reasons. Later, because of my own needs and work needs, I picked up the textbook again. Three years later, I finally got my college diploma.

San Xiao studies well and does a good job. Soon after she went to work, she served as the head teacher of grades one to three. All the students in the class like her very much and call her sister Xiao Zhao affectionately in their spare time.

I work as a worker in an internship factory in a higher vocational college. There is a big gap between us, but it is easy to communicate. Because of the distance of space, the opportunity to meet after work has become resigned, and there is always something to say. Getting together two or three times a year is really a drop in the bucket. In fact, what if it disappears? Time and space can't change anything for us. This is a faint, faint, but strong friendship.

Xiao San seldom comes back, but when we met on QQ that Friday, she said, Mix, I will go back tomorrow. I said, ok, I'll wait for you. When we finally sat together, we were still surfing the Internet. She sat at my computer desk, I sat on the sofa next to her, and I looked at her. She read my personal anthology "Aroma Tea". She said, Mix, it's a pity that you are a worker. I like many ideas in your article. You are rational and I am emotional. I like your taste, but I can't write it. I said it was a great honor for me to be praised by a talented student in the Chinese Department, and I was more confident to go on bravely on this thorny literary road.

I said, mistress, is melancholy the temperament of a scholar? My friend told me to stop writing. He said that many literati died of depression.

San Xiao said no, the experience is a painful process. If you record your life in ten years, you will live in pain for eight years.

I said mistress, I've been thinking about some problems recently, and people have become a little paranoid. Because giving and getting are always unequal, so what are we insisting on?

San Xiao said that because of love, there is persistence.

She said, Mix, you know, Binbin is gone, but I think she is very strong.

Binbin is Xiao San's child. Xiao San and I call her sister together. She watched us grow up, and we watched Binbin grow up. Two generations grew up bit by bit. We are thirty years old now, and Binbin, when she was thirteen years old last year, has become an eternal angel in our hearts.

Mix said, Mix, we watched him and watched him finally stop breathing. Do you know how cruel that is?

When Xiao San said this, I wanted to cry, but the tears did not flow out of my eyes. It flows into my heart.

Death is so close to us that it mercilessly takes away the people we love, our closest relatives in this world. Facing it, we are too weak to resist.

The memory gradually became clear, and the little figure of the child appeared vividly in front of us. That was when he was three or four years old, the third family lived in a bungalow and the last family was in the unit. There is a slate table at the head of the room, and Binbin is not as tall as us. We tease him, provoke him, and the children jump around. He is smiling, innocent and brilliant. Several times, I passed the window behind her house and saw Binbin standing on the bed by the window, looking out through the green screen window and holding the railing of the window with her hand. There are vines winding branches and green leaves outside the window. That is the hope of life and life. Is he listening to its voice?

During the holidays, when San Xiao comes back, I will go. Many times, Binbin is here, and the children are very good, sitting quietly on the sofa watching cartoons, absorbed. When we were talking in the back room, our voices were very low. During the advertisement, Binbin will get into his little head from the outside and look at us with round black eyes. I asked him to come in, and he would come in and lie prone on the table, quietly pulling toys. In fact, he doesn't understand what we are saying, but he just likes to be with adults. Sometimes when we look at the photo album, he squeezes in and giggles. We are remembering. Does he know our memories?

Later, the unit built a new building, the housing was adjusted, and the family of three moved to the first floor of my mother's unit. We became very close, but she rarely came back from work and I rarely went. Every time I pass under her window, I will habitually look in. San Xiao's mother called me warmly at the window and talked to me. She saw the shadow of San Xiao in me and became the contact between San Xiao and me. She always tells me about San Xiao and her recent return date. I will always be the first person she sees and wants to see when she comes back. At this moment, Binbin stood at the kitchen window and made a face at me. I smiled at him. I will cover my eyes with my fingers and stick out my tongue to him. This is for adults and children. I like him because he is the child of my sister San Xiao. Does he also know the truth of love me, love my dog?

When Xiao San brought Binbin to my house, I just rented someone else's house, and the price was very high. On the sixth floor, they took pains to climb up and gasped. Xiao San said, pour water, and I said yes. I asked Binbin what to eat. My aunt ate her sister's snacks. At that time, the children had grown up, and I also had my own saplings, and I understood the great hardships of maternal love. Binbin was embarrassed and shook his head. Xiao San said that it doesn't matter what you want to eat and drink with your aunt. The child is very sensible. He has grown very tall. He said, not now If I had, I would tell you. I didn't forget to say thank you at last. My elder sister's education is very successful. Binbin doesn't have the ignorance and insolence of the little emperor of modern family. Everyone loves such a child. I blew my husband off the computer and put Binbin on. He's a little embarrassed. I said, it doesn't matter. Just like at home, play as you like. Just for a second. Relax. With San Xiao's permission, he sat at the computer desk. I don't watch children play. It is normal to surf the internet. Besides games, we can get more things online. We were all very happy that day. When we left, Binbin said goodbye to her aunt. I dare not recall what I said at that time. Did I say I would come to my house next time? I dare not think. I didn't expect this to be his first and last time to play.

I sat at the computer desk where he sat, and I couldn't stop thinking about him, the chubby kid with a round head. Things have changed, and time has missed the face. Our Binbin is in another place now. Does he miss us as much as I miss him?

I didn't cry, but I felt unspeakable pain, very painful.

I miss this child with a young mother's heart. On April 17, 2006, he became an angel with broken wings in our hearts, flying in the sky with tears, but never returning to his mother's warm embrace.

As Xiao San said, persistence is because of love, and we can't stop thinking about it. Persistence is because of love, so I don't ask for anything in return.