Then, will children who grow up under such education become obedient as their parents hope?
"If you don't listen, I won't want you." This threatening education is extremely harmful. Parents should wake up. It is destroying your children step by step.
For many parents, children are the most deadly when they are disobedient, because they don't have a complete sense of self like adults, and they have no standards of good and evil.
Therefore, children's world is divorced from their nature. They only know to follow their inner life, laugh when they are happy and cry when they are unhappy.
This is also a concern of many adults, because as they grow up, their behavior will gradually be bound by social norms and become less free.
In the world of adults, your ranking may be the lowest. Therefore, people who can't understand this truth will naturally ask their children according to the survival rules of adults.
They think that the best way to manage children is to threaten them and make them feel scared, so as to achieve the goal of standardization.
Perhaps many people were born in threatening families, and their parents gradually made naughty children lose their innocence and become sensible in the eyes of adults, so they thought their parents' methods were correct.
But the pain caused by this is only clear to children who become sensible. The reason why this sentence is so lethal is not because parents are so capable, but because it happens to be executed by your children.
People who like to say this sentence, every time they hear this sentence, have wondered why children can work. Actually, it's because your children love you very much.
Because of love, I am afraid of losing you; Because of love, this sentence can work; It is also because of love that threats become unscrupulous.
Children are born ignorant, and we are not born omniscient. Many eager parents want their children to know everything, but they can never understand what this sentence means to young and ignorant children.
In the eyes of parents, this is just a tool to discipline stubborn children. They love children in essence and hope that under their own discipline, children can become better.
But in children's eyes, their world only has their parents, so getting their parents' approval is the most urgent desire at present. There are no lies in children's world. They rely more on concrete thinking in images to think about problems and do things.
They don't pretend to be adults. This sentence may be kind to adults, but it is literal to children. They will choose to listen because they are afraid that their parents will not want them.
Every time this sentence appears, their hearts will be cut once, and finally the stubborn child disappears, and the parents get a good boy recognized by everyone.
However, in the process of transformation, only the children themselves know how hurtful that sentence is. Because of their disobedience, they will be abandoned, so they can only try their best to learn to obey.
How many children have gradually become sensitive and inferior because of the long-term threat of this sentence? For individuals, family is not only a simple place to grow up, but also to shape our personality.
As the saying goes, whether a person's family is happy or not can be inferred from his personality. People who can remain childlike in adulthood are undoubtedly happy, because their families know how to protect their childlike innocence and take over all complicated things.
Many children, for fear of losing the attention of their families, have to bury their innocence and try to play "good children".
This threatening education can't make individuals develop in a better direction. Children will only secretly think that they are worthless and are not needed by their parents, so they can be abandoned indifferently.
Children who grow up in threatening families have developed a strong inferiority complex since childhood. They dare not follow their true thoughts, let alone express themselves truly.
When they leave home for the society, they will only think that they are worthless and inferior to others.
So that in any relationship, they are always influenced by childhood experiences and are afraid of being abandoned. This is the biggest impact of threatening education on children. They can't find their true value, so they have to rely on the value of others to survive.
There are many ways to change a child's bad behavior. You can appropriately use punishment to weaken the appearance of bad behavior, or you can use reward to increase the appearance of good behavior, but don't destroy it in the way that hurts children the most.