In primary school, I read Zheng's fairy tale book "Cpaing and Lu Xixi", but unfortunately I didn't finish it at that time. Otherwise, I will definitely see different scenery. Now I am a mother, and I am lucky to see Zheng's book Family Education in Zheng. I read the whole book word for word this time. After reading it, I firmly believe that my daughter will see what I can't. What I have to do is not to block her sight.
Don't block her sight, start by positioning yourself correctly. I often hear the phrase "parents are children's first teachers". I didn't think it before, but now I think it's very problematic. How can I become a teacher with children? Children are only the result of physiological needs and reproductive needs, not the cause of identity change. When the idea of "the first teacher" comes up, you should first ask yourself, am I a qualified parent?
What kind of parents are qualified? The first chapter of the book says that managing yourself is the first step for qualified parents. If you want a good child, you must first manage yourself. Children will only watch what we do and will not listen to what we say. If children want to watch less mobile phones and read more books, they should watch less mobile phones and read more books. If you want your children to be filial to you in the future, you must be filial to your parents.
Teaching by example is more important than teaching by words. For 33 years, Zheng got up at 4: 30 every morning to write. He tried his best to let his daughter know that he had to finish what he had to do in one day. As a result, the first thing my daughter does when she comes home from school every day is to do her homework and then have a rest. This is a study habit that many families want their children to have, but several parents know that poor study habits are not a problem for children, but a problem for parents.
I especially like Zheng. He lived his life and became a good parent. He only has a diploma in the fourth grade of primary school, but he has created 20 million words of fairy tales in 40 years. It stands to reason that he is fully qualified to be a "teacher" in front of children, but he bends down to be a student. The lower the parents' figure, the better the child's dignity will be nourished. On the contrary, the more parents belittle their children, the faster their self-esteem and self-confidence will be destroyed.
To be a qualified parent, never belittle your children. In his book, Zheng warned parents sarcastically about the ways to belittle their children: 1. Let children feel that they can't do anything; 2. Always stimulate him with "good" people; 3. Mould yourself into the image of a family victim and make children feel guilty; 4. Talk to your child in a commanding and unfriendly tone; 5. Do not give children freedom; 6. Fool your children in public.
Recently, a 14-year-old middle school student in Jiangxia District of Wuhan City committed suicide by jumping off a building after being slapped by his mother. This extreme case warns all parents not to despise their children. Self-esteem and self-confidence are the foundation of a person's life. Don't treat children as your own private property.
Ji Bolun once said that children came into this world with your help, not because of you. They are by your side, but they don't belong to you. ? What you can give them is your love, not your thoughts, because they have their own thoughts. What you can shelter is their bodies, not their souls, because their souls belong to tomorrow, which you never dreamed of.