Childhood is an important period for children's social development. Children's experiences and experiences in this period, as well as their social development on this basis, will affect their lives. Whether they can adapt to the society, handle all kinds of interpersonal relationships and shoulder their due social responsibilities in the future depends largely on their life experience and education during this period. Parental rearing patterns reflect parents' attitudes towards their children and their educational concepts.
Parenting style: Parents influence their children's psychological development through parenting activities.
Children's sociality: in the process of interaction with social environment, children master social norms, form social skills, learn social roles, acquire social needs, attitudes and values, develop social behaviors, associate with people with unique social personality, interact with each other, adapt to the surrounding environment, and develop from natural people to social people.
(B) the impact of different ways of family education on children's development
Different educational attitudes and methods have different effects on children's social development in the future. Good family education is beneficial to children's social development, while bad family education hinders children's social development to some extent.
1, doting type
Some parents overindulge their children, and overindulgence is the most common wrong way of family education. The attitude of doting parents towards their children is "afraid of falling into their hands and melting into their mouths", which interferes too much with their children and limits their thoughts and activities. Therefore, children are often timid, and their living ability and learning ability are not very good, and they lack interest in things.
Makarenko, a famous educator in the former Soviet Union, said: If parents don't love their children enough, they will feel pain, but if they spoil them too much, even though it is a great emotion, they will be destroyed. Obey the children, let the children have the final say, and do not stop some unreasonable demands and behaviors. Children have been at the core of this uncompromising position for many years, and they can't correct their mistakes. Unreasonable desires are often met with unprincipled connivance, thus making children develop willful and unreasonable character and strengthening self-centered consciousness. Children who grow up in this way have poor self-control, often seek satisfaction at that time by crying, lack self-confidence, perseverance and sense of responsibility, are impulsive and aggressive, and do not consider other people's feelings.
2. Authoritarian type
Autocratic education is also a highly controlled education. Autocratic parents often show a lack of enthusiasm and negative emotional response to their children, and rarely consider their wishes and requirements. Parents will unconditionally ask their children to abide by their own rules, express dissatisfaction with their children's violation of rules, and even take severe punishment measures. Autocratic parents require their children to obey themselves absolutely, and their freedom is limited. Parents want their children to grow up according to their own development blueprint, and they want to pay attention to all their behaviors, protect and supervise their children. Parents often adopt authoritarian parenting style in order to be "good to children", which limits the development of children's self-awareness and self-education ability to a certain extent and cannot achieve the expected educational purpose. Children who grow up in this educational environment are often prone to form personality characteristics of inferiority, dependence, obedience, cowardice and lack of initiative. Because of the lack of parents' care and warmth from childhood, children don't know how to express their emotions and thoughts properly. In the long run, they will be alienated from their parents and have rebellious psychology.
3, laissez-faire type
The laissez-faire family education, like the parents of authoritative education, is full of positive feelings for children, but lacks control. Explain that parents don't care about their children and don't ask for them. They refuse to respond to their children's needs in time, let alone give them emotional support. They seldom communicate with their children, lack discipline and let themselves go. This type of children tend to be impulsive, aggressive, self-centered, and have a tendency of indifference, rebellion, aggression, inferiority, weak self-control and poor independence. In the process of interacting with people, I seldom think of others and lack enthusiasm and concern for people. This kind of laissez-faire family education is beneficial to the development of children's social adaptability to a certain extent. However, due to parents' lack of basic attention to their children, there is little communication between parents and children. In the long run, it is easy to cause emotional alienation between parents and children and family estrangement.
4. Types of democracy
Democratic parents don't beat and scold their children at will, but analyze and guide their children's behavior. They take more ways to help and encourage their children in the process of their growth or study, and rationally use the means of reward and punishment to let them gain knowledge and understand things from their parents' behavior and education. In this family atmosphere, parents understand and respect their children, and also communicate with them, giving them room to grow freely. Children who grow up in this family environment are respected since childhood, and there is no lack of guidance and requirements from their parents, and often become the most independent and confident people. Parents can treat and respect their children equally, listen to their voices, give them intimate help, respond to their needs in time, and let them feel warm and caring.
Third, how to effectively develop children's sociality in the family.
The difference of children's social development level directly affects the difference of family education mode choice. Therefore, parents should treat their children's social development level correctly and improve their social development status by establishing healthy family education methods.
1. Improve parents' awareness of social education and consciously educate their children as social representatives.
2. Establish a democratic family.
Children are individuals with independent personalities. Parents should put their children on an equal footing, listen to their opinions, let them dare to express their opinions and demands in front of their parents, and at the same time let them restrain themselves, respect their parents and elders, and guide their children with a tolerant and democratic attitude, which can actively promote the development of their internal control ability and improve their cognitive ability.
3. lead by example, lead by example.
Parents are children's first teachers, and their words and deeds have a subtle influence on children. Parents must have good moral quality, create a democratic and harmonious family atmosphere, adopt a strict but not evil attitude towards their children, be strong and not fierce, and be consistent in attitude and words, so that children can obtain excellent qualities such as respect, care, unity and consideration from an early age.