Teach your child how to behave and never talk to him with a condescending attitude.
Don't think that what parents say is authority and can't be changed. The experience of children's education suggests that parents should respect their children and their roles should be bosom friends. Parents are not perfect. They should be brave enough to admit their mistakes. If children's views are correct, they should be respected. This is easier said than done.
If there is a mistake, it will be punished, and if it is right, it will be rewarded, so that rewards and punishments are clear.
The forms of praise and encouragement should be varied, not only material satisfaction, but also a smile, a nod, an expression on your face and so on. , indicating recognition of a certain behavior. Children's educational experience suggests that parents should be consistent in education, with consistent requirements, consistent concepts, consistent goals and diverse methods, because each child's characteristics are different.
We should not only guide, but also learn to guide correctly.
Parents should talk more about the usefulness of rules and let their children know that rules are everywhere, and certain rules can guarantee people to live a better life. Children's educational experience suggests how to help children gradually form a clear, unified, flexible and sustainable sense of rules in life situations, so that children's personality and sociality complement each other, so as to get a happy life and feelings in society.
Punishment is ok, but you have to be skillful.
The formation of rule consciousness sometimes requires a certain price to make children change from heteronomy to self-discipline Tips on children's educational experience, understanding with reason, moving with emotion and expressing with different consequences, can make children feel slowly and become sensible.
Setting rules for children needs to pay attention to the first. When making rules for children, the signal should be clear. For example, the yellow light on the street indicates that you can park or not. Who stopped voluntarily? When making rules, you need to clearly tell your children the consequences of doing so.
Second, tell the truth and don't label children easily. If we adults say something. You gave me trouble when you were born? In this case, children will associate themselves with bad children and lose confidence.
Third, punishment must be timely. Children's long-term memory is poor. In the evening, he probably forgot to chew slowly in the morning. In fact, there is no need for mothers to say that the punishment for their children should be practical.
Fourth, to make rules for children, it must be simple and easy to understand, so that children can easily abide by them. Children's understanding ability is not so profound and their self-control ability is not strong. Establishing very complicated and difficult rules will confuse him, not make him obey them. Tell the truth clearly, not simply and rudely order the children, and don't put on a fierce face. Listen to me! I'm in charge! ? Don't think that children are too young to understand anything. Maybe he can't fully understand what you said for a while, but your calm tone and respectful attitude will make him trust your judgment and obey your requirements.
Fifth, we must abide by the established rules, no matter when and where. Make rules for children, not today, tomorrow, one at home and one outside. This will only make children confused and at a loss. All the rules are not only for children, but also for parents to strictly abide by and set an example.
Sixth, the rules are not absolutely unbreakable. At the request of the child, by accident? Relax the policy? . For example, replace dinner with snacks, watch TV at noon, stay up for an hour and so on? It will reduce the pressure and make children obey the rules more consciously. Trust the child, don't think it was an accident? Indulge? What bad habits will you develop? There are some things that children can let go and experience by themselves? Indulge? Consequences Some things, persuasion is useless, just change the way, not necessarily ask directly.
Seventh, don't use adult's code of conduct to regulate and restrain children, and don't scold all the naughty behaviors of children? Make a mistake? . From the child's point of view, it's fun to realize that she threw water on you or something. So you won't be angry, but tell her gently. I know it's interesting, but I don't like it. Wet clothes make me uncomfortable. Please don't throw water on me again. ?
Children before the age of six should understand these six rules. Rule 1: There should be no rude or vulgar behavior.
What kind of behavior should a child have to be rude and vulgar?
For example, Lele robbed children of things in kindergarten. If the children didn't give it, he began to fight, saying, If you don't give it to me, I'll let my brother beat you into a disability! Lele's practice is rude and vulgar.
This kind of child likes to force others to obey his will by violent means, and likes to attack and intimidate others to realize their wishes by language. However, such an approach is absolutely not desirable!
What should parents do if children have vulgar words and deeds?
First of all, help the child distinguish right from wrong and tell him clearly: Lele can't do this in the future, it's rude and will be criticized! ? Then let the children reflect on themselves and come up with better ways to deal with such things.
For example, mother can ask: Lele knows that she is wrong now, so what should she do with her children's toys in the future? Mom and dad calm down and guide. In such an environment, smart children will soon find other solutions. At this time, they should also give him appropriate encouragement and set this rule for him.
Such rules can help children adjust their emotions, learn how to treat what they want, how to deal with their own emotions, how to deal with emotions that have already happened, and so on. In this process, children will constantly adjust their views on things and their mentality. When he grows up, he will also use this model to treat people around him and become more rational and considerate.
Rule 2: Don't take other people's things.
Before the age of 6, children's self-awareness has just sprouted, and it is often difficult to distinguish themselves from others, let alone know what is their own and what is others'. So as long as a child likes something, he will reach for it without hesitation, don't you think? Get it in my hand and it's mine! ? Just like having fun, I always say: My mother is mine, my father is mine, and all the toys are mine! ? Lele will cry whenever she sees her parents take away other children or toys?
At this time, parents should consciously help, remember to establish self-awareness, and tell him with the clothes of adults and children. This is yours, this is dad's and this is mom's. ? Help him to establish the boundary between himself and others. When children can clearly distinguish the difference between themselves and others, parents should also ask their children more questions on purpose. Is this yours? Let him judge independently and make rules for him.
Can such rules help children to distinguish better? Yours Mine? Knowing that it's either your own or someone else's, you can't take other people's things, and? Mine? Things must be handled by me. This distinction of the concept of real right is the basis of the most basic morality and mentality, and he will know how to respect others better when he grows up.
Rule 3: Put back what you took.
Children's self-care ability is not good. They always like to throw toys when they play. Throw it away when you are tired of playing, and wait for mom to help him clean up the mess. Many mothers say nothing, don't you think? The child is still young and doesn't know how to tidy up. It's easier to help him collect it. .
In fact, children before the age of 6 are fully capable of packing their own things, but the love and accommodation of their parents make him lose the opportunity to exercise himself. Let's make a rule for him. After every game, he has to tidy up his toys, tidy up his desk after finishing his homework and so on, so that he can learn where to take things and put them back.
Such rules can help children learn to care for the environment and eventually form respect for the environment and their own growth. Moreover, while putting things away, children also improve their self-care ability. In the process of tidying up their desks, they can decide where to put things themselves, which is also helpful to their creativity. When he grows up, no matter what environment the child is in, he can be cultivated. Back to your place? Good habits will make life cleaner.
Rule 4: whoever gets it first will use it first, and the latecomers will have to wait.
At home, mom and dad always? Children first? Leave everything to children, give them food first, let them pick fruits first, and so on. However, the blind humility of parents will only make children more and more self-centered, don't you think? Mom and dad have to let me go, I am the oldest! ? Children who grow up in this environment often feel superior, but it is not easy to make friends when they grow up!
To overcome? Little emperor? Little princess? Bad habits should start with parents. Can parents set rules for their children and keep them? First come, first served? For example, when eating, mom should eat before serving. If the child always doesn't come, let him taste the consequences of not having food. Who brushes their teeth first when they go to the bathroom? So slowly, help children form? First come, first served? The habit of.
Such rules can prevent him from forming selfish habits and let him know that when others get something first, he must learn to wait and form an equal communication mode.
Rule 5: Don't interrupt others.
When children meet good things, such as being praised by teachers and making new friends. He always tells his parents excitedly that no matter what their parents are doing, they will not hesitate to interrupt. And now many parents are? Children first? Therefore, children are often allowed to interrupt their speeches at any time, and children will respond happily. This attitude can easily make children become desperate to disturb others. When they grow up, they may be self-centered and it is difficult to live in a group.
If a child is found to have such a bad habit, parents should consciously help him correct it in daily life and tell him that it is impolite to disturb others casually. Think about it. If the baby is sleeping and the child keeps coming to talk to you, will the baby be happy? Let the child learn empathy with calm guidance, let him know that it is very unhappy to be disturbed by others, and then set rules for him.
Such rules can help children learn to respect others, let him know not to disturb others when they are busy, and in the process, children will learn to put themselves in their own shoes and become more considerate, so it is easier to make many good friends!
Rule 6: apologize for doing something wrong.
Parents love their children, always feel? The child is still young? Let him go everywhere, even if the child makes a mistake and doesn't apologize, mom and dad will forgive him tenderly. How does this treatment make children feel? Doing something wrong is no big deal. Mom and dad will forgive me anyway, okay? Without restraint, children will inevitably do whatever they want and make more and more serious mistakes.
In fact, children before the age of 6 are young, but they have begun to understand. At this time, parents should seize the opportunity to educate him from an early age? If you did something wrong, apologize. This is a polite boy! ? When a child makes a mistake, in addition to educating him, you can also order the child to say sorry to himself. If mom and dad are wrong about their children, they should also apologize to them, set a good example for them and follow the rules with them.
Such rules can help children learn to be polite, be honest and admit their mistakes. In this process, children also learned to reflect on themselves and began to understand rights protection.