1, what life pursues and needs is a sense of security, belonging and value. Childhood dissatisfaction will continue into adulthood, leading to regret and lack. Children can be given enough sense of security, belonging and self-worth in childhood, so that they can grow into confident and independent individuals.

2, have a lifelong growth mentality. People who can learn and grow must be modest, and modesty will lead to endless climbing. Keep the habit of lifelong growth, do not compete with others, do not compare with others, and only compete with yourself all your life.

3. Children's growth education is a complex system. In a complex system, children's growth has amazing vitality and self-evolution ability. The ancients said: three days without treatment; Thirty years in Hedong, thirty years in Hexi, not bullying the young and the poor. It is important to give children space and time to grow up.

A strong teenager makes a strong country!

Children are not only the continuation of terran, the evolution of species, but also the inheritance and continuation of culture. Children are an important part of a family, the crystallization of parents and the bond between the two families!

A child is like a flower. When we plant the seeds of a flower, we will know what kind of soil the flower needs, when to water it, when to fertilize it and when to prune it ... But when we educate our children, we are mostly blind, learning to be parents for the first time, having no experience and not knowing what kind of education children should receive at different times.

Education is different from growing flowers. If the flowers are not good, you can replant them. However, children's education is irreversible. We need to understand the physiological and psychological changes in the process of children's growth in order to give them better communication and education. However, the reality is that we don't know at all that it is also a "curse" to continue parents' educational methods.

Children's education can be roughly divided into these stages: preschool, childhood, adolescence and rational transition period.

Preschool refers to the period of 0-7 years old, which is an important period for children to complete their physical and psychological development, and also a period for parents to pay attention and accompany them.

1, when the baby is born

In the mother's womb, the fetus has hearing in about 8 weeks, and can fully hear and perceive the reaction in 24 weeks.

The fetus can't see in the womb, and can only perceive its existence through hearing and smell. When a child is born, his first feeling is fear, because he suddenly changes his environment and feels insecure. Crying is a way for the baby to vent, and at the same time, the baby will begin to explore and find a safe zone.

Babies will first find their mother by voice, because the voice they hear the most when they are in their mother's belly is her voice. Finding the mother and remembering the smell of the mother is the first step for the baby to establish a sense of security.

When the baby opens his eyes and begins to see the world, he will keep everything he sees in his mind. When the environment has not changed, the baby will begin to explore the environment slowly. Of course, the safest place is the smell of the bed next to mom.

When a child is born, the baby's fist will be particularly tight, which is a sign that the child has not yet established a sense of security. Babies increase their sense of security by clenching their fists. Just as we crouch down with our heads in our arms when we are afraid, we build a sense of security through our conditioned behavioral reflex.

2, the baby's critical period

Building a sense of security is an important task for babies. After that, I stopped being afraid, and then I developed. The establishment of a sense of security in infancy is very important for a person's life.

How does the baby build a sense of security? By order. That is, in an environment where children can see and touch, don't change any order easily. For example, when the baby sleeps every day, he will see a pendant hanging in front of him. After the baby forms an order, if you write it down, you will feel uneasy and cry if you don't see it before going to bed. For example, the clothes that the mother has been wearing have changed, and the position of an object at home has changed ... These will all cause the child's bad mood and insecurity.

This subscription period starts from 3-4 months after the baby is born, and some children last until about 2 and a half years old. This period is considered by Montessori as the first sensitive period for children.

3. What should parents do?

Parental love is most needed in infancy. Parents' unconditional love, sincere love and proper love are necessary for infants' psychology.

When the relationship between husband and wife is contradictory, when the parents themselves have psychological obstacles or are unhappy, children can feel it. Even if parents try to pretend to love their children, they can still feel it. This is what we call a "field".

We will encounter embarrassing times ourselves, and when we are silent, even if we don't speak or try to express ourselves, we can feel the disobedience of the other party. This is caused by the "field" that babies are more sensitive than adults, so treat children sincerely.

Understand and tolerate children to explore their own world. Children's exploration of the world begins with things and then explores people. In this period, children's exploration of things is chaotic. He may touch anything, touch anything, throw anything ... At this time, parents should not hinder their children's exploration, but encourage and accompany them.

The best protection for children is to let them have their own things to do, not to tie them up to save trouble.

4, the baby's performance behavior

The earliest body organs used by children are mouth and hands.

When a baby eats his mother's nipple, he will find that the nipple size is basically the same as the thumb size. When the fingers are their own and the hands and mouth touch, the baby's brain will comb out confidence from the hands and mouth, and the brain will start to work and neurons will start to build. For the brain, the more connections neurons make, the more useful the brain becomes.

It is normal for children to eat their hands. This process not only brings children a sense of pleasure, but also exercises their ability to use their arms. After eating, children in this period can put some other items in their hands for them to chew, and at the same time introduce this item to their children. The advantage of this is that it can help children explore things, and it can also prevent children from developing the habit of eating hands.

At this time, the baby's hands and mouth will not stop. The hand will touch anything the eyes see, and at the same time it will send those things into the mouth one by one. These are children's jobs, just like adults' jobs. Parents should try their best to let their children explore under the premise of ensuring their safety. This is the children's job.

1, key skills

First, learn to walk

Children stand up from fear to trembling, and learn to walk, which is the common progress of coarse movements and fine movements.

During this period, children learn to walk, run, jump, kick the ball or throw the ball and so on.

At the same time, children will learn the skills of fine movements such as beading, doodling, turning pages, matching, using spoons and cups.

B, study in the toilet

Most children can control their excretion at about 2 years old. During this time, the child can understand the instructions related to going to the toilet, control the muscles related to excretion, and keep the diaper dry for 3 hours. This is a sign that the child's physical development is gradually mature.

C, deciduous teeth

Children grow about 6-8 deciduous teeth around 1 year old, and almost all have 20 deciduous teeth when they are 3 years old.

Boys' primary teeth germinate earlier than girls'.

D, language expression reading and writing

Children will transition from vocabulary to grammatical sentences, understand what adults say and express their intentions. Although sometimes I still can't express it, the rich emotional connection in the child's heart has been established. During this period, we pay special attention to the influence of language on children.

In the process of learning a language, parents should use more positive words, and at the same time use overlapping words to communicate fully with their children. When emotional words are involved, they should be clearly explained so that children can understand and express them. Why are many adolescent children rebellious and violent when they grow up, and emotional expression will not occupy an important reason, and this foundation should be established before the age of 3.

Open questions should be used in communication with children, not closed questions. Closed-ended questions are answered, and open-ended questions make children think. For example, I took my children to the zoo for a day and went to bed at night and asked them: Did you have a good time today? This question is a closed question, and children can only open their hearts or be unhappy. How do you feel when you turn the question into: We went to the zoo today? This becomes an open-ended question, and the child will answer "Have fun, so excited, what about the tiger, what about the child …". Use open questions to communicate with others!

After children learn a language, they will try to write and express it through graffiti imitation. At this time, the walls, floors and tables are places where children doodle. Establishing rules and order for children is a good breakthrough.

E, brain development

At the age of 3, the instinctive brain has basically developed. Before that, children's brains and nerves developed very rapidly, and nerve connections extended rapidly, forming a complex network structure. At this time, the more neural connections, the smarter the child will appear.

2, the child's performance behavior

Children will take unusual paths. Children will gradually evolve to stand and walk through crawling. Children will feel the touch of their legs and feet on the ground and have a novel feeling. Children will go up and down and run around.

Children don't feel tired when they learn to walk. They can explore for a long time. The best way to dislocate parents is to follow their children. Children leave their parents, and children stop them. The most undesirable thing at this time is that children's shoes will ring, which will disturb children's exploration.

Children will become stubborn. At this stage, the child does not understand the relationship between things, and he will arrange the order of things according to his own ideas. Like this period, children have high aesthetic requirements for food.

3. What should parents do?

Be tolerant of children. Children's growth has its own laws, and what children need is their parents' tolerance and patience.

Support children's imagination. Children in this period have rich imaginations. Children can play house and imagine toys as animals, which are important stages in the development of thinking in images. At this time, children can be given more materials and toys, so that children have more imagination and contact.

Respond to children's emotions. Children begin to express their emotions after learning vocabulary, and it is a very important skill for parents to reflect their emotions. Reflecting and expressing children's true feelings and expressing love for children have a very direct relationship with the establishment of love for children. An important reason why adolescent children are difficult to communicate is that parents can't accurately express their children's feelings.

Summary: Parents are the best teachers for their children, but how to be a good parent has no courses and can only be learned by themselves. The arrival of children is to help parents complete their second growth.

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This article is synchronized with the official WeChat account "Leek Study Room".

At the end of the article: Three things that children should know when educating their parents.

1, educating children is the second growth of parents. The core of children's education lies in parents. A child is a combination of father and mother. What kind of person a child will become in the future is largely determined by parents. The education of children is also a reflection of parents themselves, and the ultimate goal is the common growth and progress of parents and children.

It is very interesting to educate children and grow up with them. If you turn interesting things into yelling, growling and war, it will deviate from the original intention of educating children and having children. It is interesting to watch children grow up, it is interesting to watch children do things right, and it is also interesting to watch children do things wrong. Don't turn interesting things into boring things!

3, less discipline to let children grow naturally. Nature has created the natural growth law of each species, followed some natural laws, and let children have their own rhythm. The task of parents is to guard and guide, not to interfere.

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