What should parents do when their children make mistakes?
First, communicate with children often and pay attention to appropriate rewards and punishments.
We attach great importance to communication with our children and talk to them about what happened at school every day. We can find her progress or problems from her stories, and praise her in time if there is progress, but the praise is mainly based on spiritual rewards. If there is a mistake, remind the child first and discuss with him how to improve it. If it happens again, seriously criticize it. For example, I saw children dawdling on their homework, and it took a long time to finish very little homework. In order to speed up their homework, I said to my children, "You can do your homework carefully today, remember the time accurately and do it well. You are fully capable of finishing your homework faster. " Children like praise, and positive praise can sometimes get twice the result with half the effort.
Second, make up for the children's shortcomings step by step.
When I first went to school, my children were a little at a loss about school courses and homework. Because I never let her study primary school courses in advance when I was in kindergarten, my children were very uncomfortable when they first came into contact with school life. She knows few words, can't understand the meaning of the question, and does her homework slowly. I tried to overcome my impatience, and after communicating with Teacher Ti, I made up my children's problems consciously. After dinner every day, my children and I read aloud the new words we encountered in the textbooks, workbooks or test papers that day, and then patiently tell them the meaning of the questions. During the holidays, we take our children to the library to borrow books, go to the bookstore to buy books, tell them before going to bed, or let them tell us. Gradually, through in-class study and after-class practice, the children learned more words and gradually understood the meaning of the questions. When learning time units, children feel a little tired, so I give them a favorite little alarm clock. When children do homework, read books and play, remind them to look at the time and record it, and guide them to try to calculate how much time it takes to do various things. The children find it very interesting. At first, I looked at their watches for a long time with great difficulty, then I looked at them freely and told the time.
Third, cooperate with teachers to educate children.
When children are studying, the role of teachers is quite great. Fortunately, my daughter's teacher is a good teacher with strong sense of responsibility, rich teaching experience and understanding children's psychology, which is loved by the whole class and parents. Teacher Ti often tells our parents about their children through blogs and school newsletters. Sometimes it's very late, or on holidays, Mr. Pei will also discuss with parents the children's various performances in their studies. As a parent, I appreciate the hard work of the teacher, and sometimes I can't interact with the teacher in time because of my work relationship. I also express my deep apologies here. Every time my children are on duty, I try to get to school to attend the children's duty, take the initiative to communicate with teachers, keep abreast of the children's situation at school, and make targeted improvements. We also often educate our children to respect their teachers and listen carefully to their teachings. "One day as a teacher, life as a father" is the greatness of teachers.
Fourth, cultivate children's living ability and good work and rest habits.
At home, we consciously ask our children to do what they can, such as washing socks, towels, tidying up dishes, packing schoolbags and taking a bath. After school, let the children arrange their own time to do homework, read books and play. We ask our children to get up and rest on time and develop good habits of work and rest. Apart from the normal pocket money, we seldom give her money, because she didn't have the habit of eating snacks at random since she was a child. On the one hand, let her feel the hard work of her parents, on the other hand, cultivate her ability to live independently, so as to cherish everything she has done.
The latest family education experience sharing:
Family education should first cultivate children's good study habits. Ba Jin once said: "The successful education of children begins with the cultivation of good habits." My children have developed good study habits since they started school. When they come home from school at night, they don't turn on the TV first, but open their schoolbags to do their homework and review what they learned during the day. Put away the books to be used the next day as soon as the homework is finished; Time allows you to read some extracurricular books you like. During this period, our parents never watch TV, but also read books when they are free to create a learning atmosphere for their children. After the habit is formed, the child is quite conscious and knows when and what to do. In particular, developing good reading habits will enrich your knowledge and benefit you for life.
Secondly, I think the education of children should permeate every point of family education. First, parents should set an example first. Parents are their children's first teachers, and teaching by example is more important than teaching by example. For a simple example, some parents blame their children for swearing, but in fact, all our parents export swearing in their lives. How can this not affect their children? For another example, if parents often give their seats to the elderly on the bus, children will know how to respect the elderly in a subtle way.
Second, we should educate our children with appreciation. Every child has his own advantages and disadvantages. As a parent, he should clearly realize this, find out the bright spots of children, encourage them more, and avoid endless comparisons with other children with good grades, which will greatly hurt his self-esteem. Over time, he formed a concept in his mind-I won't. With this kind of psychology, children will lack confidence in everything and even affect their lives.
Third, listen to the child's heart. No matter how busy you are or how bad your mood is, you should listen to your children and educate them in time. Otherwise, if you are absent-minded or don't pay attention to your child at all, after a long time, your child will feel that my parents won't listen to me anyway, so just don't say it. In this way, you will completely lose the opportunity to get to know your child directly, and your child will become more and more unfamiliar with you. Every day, children will tell us every little thing that happened at school: which teacher is today; Someone deducted class points again today; Who made the teacher angry; Today I'm going to take a quiz about how my grades are, and so on. At this time, I will educate her in time after listening carefully. For example, I will fully affirm her achievements and point out her shortcomings, so that children will be more willing to accept them; For another example, let her find out what advantages a classmate with poor grades has, maybe he has a good sports score, maybe this classmate is very helpful, and so on. Let children know that everyone has advantages and disadvantages, so as to better unite classmates and learn their advantages. My daughter has always been very popular among her classmates, and I think she owes a lot to this kind of education.
Fourth, if you have time, spend as much time as possible with your children. Play with children, whether at home or outdoors, so as to better understand children and better educate them. In order to cultivate children's love and exercise their observation, I have a lot of fun with my children in raising flowers, grass and small animals. Outdoor activities, contact with society, contact with outsiders, there are good opportunities to educate children anytime and anywhere.
How to change children's grumpy temper
1, usually communicate with children.
Understand the needs of children and pay attention to the interaction between children. Parents can learn more about what other children are playing, thinking, having any requirements and so on. When children put forward their own requirements, parents can better understand their children's feelings, and then enlighten and patiently explain, which can eliminate or alleviate their anger.
2. When the child loses his temper, don't strengthen his behavior.
Did his family always protect him or teach him? If you protect him blindly, it will make him taste the sweetness, which is actually a negative reinforcement and will make him more fierce. The correct way is for parents to let their children know and remember a truth: it is useless to be noisy and lose your temper. This can make children understand that "crying and losing your temper as a weapon" is not feasible. After several times of such education, children's habit of losing their temper will change.
3. Cultivate children's flexibility in doing things
When children play with toys and eat, they should not "fix" a way, method and appearance, but try to "diversify" from an early age to give children a choice. Especially when one kind of thing, food and toy no longer exists, children should be guided to transfer to other things, food and toys in time. The better this adjustment ability, the better its flexibility. When a child's interest increases and his attitude towards difficulties and problems is flexible, his habit of losing his temper will be alleviated.
It is epigenetic for children to lose their temper easily.
Some parents lose their temper when their children lose their temper and lose their temper with each other. This emotional approach will never change the child's habit of losing his temper. Some mothers think that children are prone to lose their temper, but they can't beat him, so they push him to their father for discipline, which will make the children have a feeling that "mother can't help losing her temper with him", and then he will lose her temper in front of her more and more.
5. Cultivate children's broad interests
Children should learn painting at the age of 3-4; Learning music should be between the ages of 5 and 7. Therefore, the cultivation of interest should not be too early or too late. Children's interests are particularly easy to transfer. Don't just decide according to the opinions of parents, but listen to the opinions of professionals and children themselves.
6. Find out why the child is so angry.
Children have low self-emotional adjustment ability, lack of self-control ability, poor expression ability, and lose their temper at a little thing; Or the child lacks the ability to judge whether his request is reasonable.
How to educate children with a happy family?
First, let them do something they like from time to time.
If children can get enough encouragement from their parents, they will thrive. Often yell at the children: "What are you doing there again?" Parents seem to have stabbed their children in the heart, which will do great psychological harm to them. Each of us needs time to relax, listen to music, or do nothing but stare blankly. Then, when our "battery" is fully charged again, we will be full of energy and ready for the next challenge. So are children.
Second, find out whether there are hidden difficulties.
This statement sounds self-evident. But in fact, have you ever asked your children why they suddenly don't want to participate in group activities and do their homework? Maybe he will speak his mind under your questioning-he has been bullied by bad children, he doesn't like his teacher and so on.
A good environment is equally important. Some children concentrate most in a quiet room, while others like a lively background. If your child says he doesn't like being locked in a room alone, let him do his homework on the kitchen table. If a child becomes unmotivated, he usually has a reasonable reason.
Third, give children a choice.
It is very important to let children do things according to their own interests, which is also one of the best ways to help children succeed. If you let your child feel that she has the freedom to choose ballet or aerobics, she will work harder to do the one she chooses.
However, she still needs your strong support at this time. For example, although your child is willing to go to the band for rehearsal on Saturday morning, she may still interrupt or give up if you don't send her there. Most children have a wide range of interests, so parents must invest. Unless children are different, they will lose their focus, stop focusing on things and decide to watch TV or play games instead.
Fourth, talk about your work positively.
Being exhausted after a disturbing day's work is a part of life. However, in this state, it is also important to tell your children what makes you happy and unhappy at work. Inspire his vision and enthusiasm, and he will think, "If I work hard, I will be as successful as my mother." If you are stuck in a boring job and really have nothing to share with your child, tell him that if you can't get a certain qualification or education, you can't find an interesting job. Sometimes, children find motivation from the idea that they never want to live like their parents.
Step 5 explain your reasons
If you don't want your child to give up piano education because you are sure it will be good for him, what will you do? Whatever you want to do, don't yell at the child and scold him at the top of your lungs. After shouting for a few minutes, he stopped listening to what you were saying. On the contrary, if you are willing to explain to him why you think it is important to continue practicing, he may agree with you instead. Even if he still disagrees, it doesn't matter. He probably has his own opinion. Parents should also listen to their children's opinions and tell them that whatever they do, what they have learned will remain in their experience and will never be wasted.
Sixth, pay attention to the role of praise.
It is extremely important to constantly praise children, but praise must be targeted. Children are not stupid at all. If he shows you what he has just finished and you just say "well done", he will know that you have not really noticed him and his achievements. What you should say at this time is: "I like the way you discuss this in your article, which is very thought-provoking." Or "You play scales very smoothly." Wait a minute. Then, the child knows that you are really interested in his small grades, and he will work harder to win your praise next time.
Seven, wise reward
Parents will promise that if children do well in the exam, they will get a bike; If you don't do well in the exam, you will get nothing. In fact, it is a terrible attitude to treat children like this. This practice makes children very anxious before the exam, thinking that the exam is very important, and once they fail in the exam, they will become depressed again. In theory, doing well is a reward in itself, but in fact, most children will do well if there are some material incentives. Therefore, parents are advised not to give your child a big reward. If they do well, they should be given a small gift to show their gratitude and encouragement. This is a positive push, and they won't be too worried if they don't achieve their predetermined goals.
Eight, accept him now.
If you are only interested in whether your child is the best reader in the class, you expect too much. Every child grows at his own pace. Comparing your child with other children will make him feel that if he doesn't study and do things according to a certain standard, he is a failure. On the contrary, if your child seems to have some talents in painting or sports, as a parent, you should give him every opportunity to develop his talents. Persecution is wrong, but encouragement is beneficial. Don't let a child who can't walk run away. However, if he wants to run, you should give him whatever help you can.
Introduction of happy family education methods
1. Dare to apologize to your child.
In family life, parents often say something wrong, do something wrong, and even wronged their children. How to deal with such problems is really one of the arts of family education.
Parents and children should have a democratic and equal relationship in the family. Parents should take the initiative to apologize if they have done something wrong or wronged their children. This will neither affect the prestige of parents nor damage their dignity; On the contrary, it will set an example for children to correct their mistakes, and will make children sincerely admire their parents' quality and cultivation, so as to trust their parents more and be close to them; The dignity of parents will not be reduced, but will be higher, which will also form a relaxed, harmonious and democratic atmosphere conducive to the growth of children in the family. Of course, when parents apologize and admit their mistakes, especially for their children, they must be sincere, not perfunctory, not looking for objective reasons, and sincerely seek forgiveness.
Parents should give their children a chance to choose.
In the family, parents should allow their children to do things according to their own interests. If you let your child learn ballet or practice aerobics, she will devote herself to doing what she likes, and it will not be too hard.
3. Children who learn to be tolerant
Tolerance means that after a child has done something wrong, parents accept the child's fault with a broad mind. They don't reprimand or investigate harshly, which will make the child deeply blame himself, calmly think about his past in regret and guilt, and urge him to turn over a new leaf in the generosity of his parents.
Parents should accept their children, regardless of their personality.
Every child has his own personality, and children will develop and grow at their own pace, so parents should know how to let go and give their children some freedom. If you like to compare your child with other people's children, it's easy for him to get the wrong impression. If he is inferior to others, he is a loser. Coercion is wrong, and encouragement is beneficial.
5. Discover hidden difficulties in time.
You should take care of your children, but this doesn't mean staring at them all the time, but getting to know them, for example, finding that they are suddenly unwilling to participate in group activities and do their homework. You have to be patient and let him tell the truth-being bullied by a bad boy, he doesn't like his teacher and so on. It varies from person to person. Some children concentrate most in a quiet room, while others like a lively background. If your child doesn't like being locked in a room alone, let him do his homework at the dinner table.
6. Treat children as adults and try to tell them the ups and downs in their work.
If you come home from work every day, try to tell your children about your happiness or troubles at work, treat them as adults, and stimulate their desire and enthusiasm. Maybe he will think, "If I work hard, I will be as successful as my mother." If your job is boring and there is nothing to "bask in", you can also tell your children that if you don't get a certain degree, you can't find an interesting job. Some children don't want to live like their parents, which will motivate them to work hard.
7. Pay attention to the methods of guiding children to convince people.
You know, children also have their own opinions, not what adults want. If a child wants to give up piano education, don't yell at him and scold him at the top of his lungs. But tell him why he wants to continue practicing, and he may change his mind. Even if he still disagrees, it gives him a chance to speak freely.
8. Don't be stingy with your praise and appreciation for your children.
Parents should give their children more praise and appreciation, but they should also be measured. Praise should be targeted and words should be substantive. He shows you what he has just finished. Instead of simply saying good, you said, "I like the way you discussed this in your article, which is very thought-provoking." Or "You play scales very smoothly." Wait a minute. He feels different and will try harder to win your approval next time. The reward for children is not necessarily a grand prize. When they do well, they send some small gifts as encouragement. There is no need to frown in case they can't reach the expected goal. They should give priority to encouragement.