Once, I accidentally cut my hand while cooking for my one-and-a-half-year-old son. The baby behind him has never seen a bloody scene. His eyes were wide open and he was at a loss. I told him: "The baby can't carry the knife, and the knife cuts his hand. Bleeding, my hand hurts. " I wanted to take the opportunity to tell him about the danger of holding a knife, but my son learned from his words that my hand hurts. He took two steps closer, pouted and gently blew into my hand. At this moment, I have a surprise in my heart: children learn to care about others and love at an early age! Because every time a child stumbles, we will give him a little blow. Now, he also learned to use this method to alleviate his mother's pain.
What makes me proud and comforted is yet to come. When dressing the wound, I casually said to the child, "Mom's hand hurts and she can't hold the baby." Take the children for a walk at night as usual, and usually they will pounce on me just after a few steps. The baby who put his arm around my leg, raised his little face and said, "Mommy hugs me" has gone a long way.
I thought he forgot, because he was reciting children's songs while walking. I'm afraid he's tired. Give him a hug. Unexpectedly, he actually said very seriously: "Mom's hand hurts, don't hug!" At this point, I seem to forget that my heart-to-heart fingers are still hurting. I grabbed the child and kissed him hard. The child leaned on my shoulder, rested for a while, and then took his legs and walked up.
For parents, loving children is not a simple feeling of licking calves. This love contains a deeper meaning. It makes our eyes look longer, it makes our hearts nobler, it makes impetuousness calm, and it makes randomness rational. If you really love children, you should let them know how to feel and appreciate love.
It is not easy to do this. Few parents nowadays don't treat their children as the apple of their eye, but some children are often indifferent to the love given by their parents. They think that their parents' love is innate, and they keep asking for it while abandoning it without cherishing it. What's more, they will be bored with their parents' love, or disgusted with the improper way of love. If children are insensitive to their parents' love, it should be said that their parents' education has failed. Such children grow up and miss happiness because they don't appreciate love.
How to educate children to love their parents?
The process of teaching children to know love is also the process of teaching children to learn to love. When feeding your baby delicious food, you might as well say, "It smells good. Can you give it to your mother?" Usually a child will use a small spoon to carry it, of course you will praise him. But what if the child is reluctant to give it? Do you think it's funny to laugh it off? Or just say you don't like it? Don't underestimate this common teasing, it will give me delicious food first and tell the children that mother loves me. He will gradually feel the joy of sharing with others.
If the child is cold, you might as well ask him, "Is dad cold, too?" When adding clothes to the child, ask him, "Where are dad's clothes?" "which one does mom wear?" Doing so can not only teach him daily knowledge, but also inspire his love.
If your child does something that makes you unhappy, when you tell him clearly how you feel, let him put himself in the other's shoes. What will happen to him? As long as we are properly educated, children will understand that they should not only get love from their parents, but also return it with love.
Children's words and deeds reflect their parents' behavior. Children are narrow-minded, and parents may not be sincere; Parents are grumpy, and children are either indifferent or timid; Children can get along with children, and parents are more open-minded and gentle; Parents are cheerful and optimistic, and children will not be depressed and anxious. Therefore, teaching children love is also an opportunity to observe their words and deeds and correct themselves.
If we want our children to have a happy life, we might as well remember this sentence: "Teach children to love their parents, and they will love others and be loved."
How to be a child's favorite parent
Children's problems often originate from their parents. Parents' problems cannot be solved, and children's problems cannot be discussed. Can't think, utilitarianism is the achilles heel of most parents. In order to truly become a popular closest partner between parents and children, we must do the following five things.
Know what children need.
Every parent wants their children to be good, but few people know how their children can be "good". If "good" means success and happiness, what qualities do children need to have to win their own success and happiness?
Many parents aim to "enter the university". In fact, you don't have to go to college to have a chance, and you don't have to go to college to have a chance. Only paying attention to the pursuit of academic qualifications is actually turning a blind eye and not seeing Mount Tai!
A healthy personality, a positive attitude, the ability to adapt to the environment and seize opportunities are the most basic guarantees for happiness in life.
Know what your words and deeds mean to your children.
Children feel too much about us, without deliberate observation, imitating too many attitudes, without deliberate imitation. It doesn't matter what we want, what children see from our behavior and what they learn are important! In front of children, we should not live and do things without thinking. We must be careful and consider what this means to children.
Do you know how to do it?
Knowing what to do is called having a direction; Knowing how to do it is called having the ability; Without direction, effort and speed are meaningless; Only direction, no method, direction itself is meaningless. Parents are not easy to be, but they must be good. There is a solution to everything. We should not give up because of difficulties. We must explore how to solve it. Please refer to the section "What to do when there is no other choice".
You know, being a man is being a parent.
Since education is to make children live better in the future, then life is the direction of education. What we need in life is what our children need in the future; What tests us now will test our children in the future. All the troubles, challenges and opportunities we face will be faced by our children in the future. Although the climate of the times is constantly changing, the basic problems such as getting along with people, digesting pressure, resisting inertia and weakness, restraining desire, self-improvement, opening up the situation and grasping opportunities are eternal. We handle our own affairs well and do ourselves well, which not only provides children with experience worth learning, but also conveys a positive attitude to them. Therefore, when we are human beings, we are also parents, and the process of our life is always to educate our children.
Parents' healthy values and outlook on life are one of the most important conditions for the success of family education. Parents make demands on their children, get along with each other day and night, and infiltrate their values and outlook on life into their children all the time. Values and outlook on life determine the direction of children's life and the way of feeling the world.
In life, parents demonstrate their own practices to their children, put forward suggestions and requirements to their children according to the specific situation they face, and create a better family atmosphere and living environment for their children, thus realizing their education. Therefore, the boundary of life is the boundary of education, and the process of life is the process of education.
How should parents love their children correctly?
Family is the cell of society, and parents are the first teachers of children. Parents have good intentions for their children's future, and the final result is often unsatisfactory. What is the reason? This is mainly due to their incorrect way of loving their children and their parents' lack of wise family education.
To love them, we must let them become people with all-round and coordinated development of morality, intelligence, physique and beauty.
While educating children to become talents, we should also educate children to become adults, knowing that adults are more important than becoming talents. In the eyes of parents, children's scores are the most important. As long as the children study hard, everything will be fine. Parents often neglect the cultivation of good moral qualities such as honesty, obligation and cooperation, and the construction of healthy personality, so it is easy to create some "crooked talents" and "evil talents" with excellent intelligence.
Although it is not advisable to emphasize knowledge over ability training, it is also impossible to emphasize wisdom over morality. Ma Jiajue incident that shocked the whole country; In 2000, Xu Li, a student in Jinhua City, Zhejiang Province, killed his mother and raised him with a steel head. Zhou Yingmin of Zhejiang Education College killed his classmate Hongmou with a paper knife and sank his classmate into the West Lake. These endless juvenile crimes have sounded the alarm for people.
Whether a person can be a success or not, the intelligence factor often accounts for only 20%, while the other 80% is a personality factor. On the issue of children's growth, parents should always keep a normal mind: children's intelligence can not be extraordinary, but children must be physically and mentally healthy. Because positive personality factors and good quality are the guarantee for children to cope with the ups and downs of life. In fact, when children grow up, even if they are full of Confucian ethics, it is difficult to develop greatly without practical ability. To advocate the implementation of quality education now is to make the educated's intelligence and physical strength develop fully and perfectly, that is, to develop morally, intellectually, physically and aesthetically.
To love them, we must let them experience hardships and setbacks.
In fact, a truly successful person has all kinds of excellent talents, such as creativity and personality, tempering in adversity, and a high degree of civilized quality. Excessive protection of children will lead to poor psychological endurance and unsound personality. Many parents always try their best to shelter their children from the wind and rain, thinking that this is the greatest concern and love for their children. As everyone knows, this is tantamount to digging a gentle trap on the road of children's growth. Because the children who fall into the trap are deprived of the opportunity of failure and frustration, they will not make mistakes and do not know how to correct them. Naturally, they will not get experience and lessons, so they will never learn excellent skills. Failure and frustration are the school of life, which can torture people.
It can test people, educate people, exercise people, and make people learn a lot of useful things for life.
If you love them, you must set a good example in front of them.
In the process of a person's growth, family is the first stain on his character, and family is the first teacher to shape his behavior, so it is particularly important for parents to set an example. Now some parents are profligate and gamble excessively, but they ask their children to be thrifty; Some parents look down on scholars themselves, but hope their children will achieve something. The result is often counterproductive, mainly because they only pay attention to words and deeds, not words and deeds.
The child was born with a blank sheet of paper. He learned to live by observing and imitating, and everything his parents said and did had a profound influence on them. Parents' indomitable and enterprising attitude towards life and personality strength set a good example for their children. Sometimes, parents' casual strokes often have unexpected effects-or freehand brushwork; Or pollute the whole white paper. For the sake of their children's bright future, parents must carefully describe today's brushstrokes.