The first way for a good mother to educate her children is not to ask too much of them.
Don't compare your children with your excellent students, otherwise it will bring pressure to your children invisibly. Parents who are teachers should have a correct attitude. Just because their children are not good enough doesn't mean that their work ability is not good.
Second, give children the space to solve their own problems and let them develop naturally.
Especially when parents and children are in the same school, don't care too much about their children's every move, and give them time and space to correct their own problems. Children do well, we should praise them in time, and don't avoid relatives.
Third, pay attention to your words and deeds.
Some teachers relax immediately after returning home, pay no attention to their way of speaking, or fail to change roles in time after returning home, lacking intimacy. You should take a good measure and be a teacher and friend.
The fourth reason is both reasonable and reasonable.
Some teaching methods are very effective in educating students, but only after they have educated their children. The reason is that teachers and parents are emotionally distressed by their children. Therefore, when educating children, we should act according to the rules, neither too harsh nor blindly compromise. We should be principled and flexible.
Fifth, be good at summing up.
Husband and wife reached an agreement on educational concepts and methods. The teaching rules and methods summarized in the teaching process can be consciously applied to the education of children.
Sixth, learn to love children.
Affirm the child's progress in time; Motivate children materially; Give appropriate help to children when they need it; Spend more time with your children, such as doing sports, watching a movie or traveling together; Pay attention to children's growth and give more useful suggestions.
A good mother's way to educate her children: parenting standards 1;
Keep your word Many mothers know that example is better than words, but in real life, children are often left behind? Teach by example? With what? Lead by example? In contradiction.
While telling the kids? Every grain is hard? While throwing away tasteless food; While telling the kids? Kong Rong qinli? While scrambling to squeeze the car to grab the seat; Tell the children to listen to the teacher while commenting on the teacher behind his back? Contradictory behaviors like this abound. If the mother doesn't do what she says, even if you ask the child confidently again, you can only convince the child, but not convince him that the future will become? Two-faced? Is predictable.
Operation guide:
1, the things promised to the children must be fulfilled, but the things that are not sure must not be promised. Even if the children cry and make trouble again, as long as they are considered unreasonable, they must not be promised. Never? Why don't you promise him to save the child's tears first? This idea. As for the child's praise, as long as we promise him, no matter what happens, we will definitely do it. Over time, children can adapt to this kind of education, know that crying is useless, and know that what they have said must be done. What do you mean? A promise is a promise? Is it necessary to be a man? Keep your word? .
2. In the process of educating children, it is also an invisible supervision for us adults. Sometimes, in order to send the child away, I tried to make an excuse casually, hoping to get away with it, but in this case, the child became a supervisor, asking the mother to start from herself, pay attention to her words and deeds, and not let the child find fault. Educating children in this way not only saves a lot of words, but also cultivates children? Honesty? The virtue of.
Parenting rule 2:
Respect the child, the punishment is reasonable, shout out the child's name or the next conclusion, like it? Are you really careless? Are the two most ineffective methods, which will only hurt children's self-esteem.
Therefore, your criticism of children's behavior should be as stingy as possible across the board. Theoretically speaking, giving a certain punishment to a child's bad behavior can make the child understand the relationship between behavior and consequences, and at the same time teach him what responsibility is, and it is his responsibility to bear the consequences. If parents decide to use this punishment, it is best to explain the consequences to their children in advance and give them a clear warning.
Operation guide:
1. Sometimes we can't predict children's behavior. What should we do? The reasonable response is that when a child has bad behavior, the mother must come up with a moderate punishment result for this behavior, and then implement it immediately, and must not drag her feet. For example, if you take your son to the supermarket to buy things, he always runs around the aisle of the shelf. At this time, the wrong thing to do is to say to him: Next time you buy something, you must take a shopping cart! ? The correct way is to put him in the shopping cart at once and tell him to sit in it this time.
2. For example, if a child hits someone, sometimes the mother needs to take the child away and leave the situation at that time, but it can calm him down and realize his mistake. Once a child makes a mistake, some mothers like to lecture endlessly on this issue. Instead, take him out for a walk and change the environment. After walking for a while, tell him: I love you very much, but I will never allow you to hit people. ? Some people may ask: Is this a punishment for hitting children? There is obviously no punishment for this. There is really no punishment, because the ultimate goal of a mother to discipline her child in various ways is to cool down her child's excessive behavior and let him stop these bad behaviors. So sometimes you can try some low-key mitigation methods, which may be enough to achieve the effect you want.
Parenting rule 3:
Try to control your emotions. Mom has become? Tigress?
I'm afraid many mothers can't accept this statement, but feel that children don't understand their parents' wishes too much. I am so strict with him, all for his own good! Do you know that?/You know what? The depth of love, responsibility? If I treat him badly, why should I take care of him so hard? It is estimated that many mothers don't understand what the problem is. It's not just children who make mistakes by shouting, slamming doors and being rude. Few parents can boast that they have never lost control when disciplining their children, and most of us will regret our behavior afterwards. Now, many mothers seem to understand? Strict father gives birth to a dutiful son, but a loving mother loses more? The truth. So many mothers are very concerned about their children's performance at home and at school. And this kind of attention always wants to catch him. Braids? Only accept the advantages of children, not the shortcomings of children, and can't tolerate children's mistakes. Anger out of control will affect the outcome of your efforts to discipline your children. If children are always shouting, they will learn nothing. On the contrary, once he gets used to your way, he will turn a deaf ear to your words, and gradually he will turn a deaf ear to your criticism or praise.
Operation guide:
1. Disciplining your child with a cool head will make your child feel that your teaching is objective and fair, and he is willing to do what you ask him to do with great interest.
2. Think about how to calm yourself down when you want to be angry in the future. Count from 1 to 10, or take a few deep breaths, or walk away for a while. But if these methods still don't help, you will eventually lose your temper with your child out of control. Remember to apologize sincerely to your child afterwards and tell him that you are human and make mistakes, but you can admit and correct your mistakes.
If you are particularly angry, you can express your emotions completely. But if you lose your temper frequently, your child will get used to it when you get angry again.
Parenting rule 4:
Praise is measured, and quite a few parents misunderstand it? Appreciate education? What do they think are the basic principles? Appreciate education? Even if you dig three feet, you have to find a reason to praise your child, or even think? Children don't have these strengths. If you praise him, he is embarrassed to deny it, and naturally he will work hard in this direction. ?
Is it really that simple? A child is well aware of his image in the eyes of others, and he will suspect that his parents have their own purpose in praising him like this. They said to make me listen. They are fake. ? For praise? Who you really are? The more praise a child can get, the more stubborn he is. Psychologist Guinot found out? Too much praise for young children will cause disgust and anxiety. ? By the way, once the child finds out that the parents' encouragement is with? Coax? Naturally, he is likely to be more resistant. ? You're amazing! You are really a sensible boy, and you are the pride of your parents. Oh, you acted like an angel this morning! ? For babies under 5 years old, like this? Abstract? His encouragement is meaningless. He doesn't understand what his behavior is like. Angels? What behaviors have become parents'? Proud? .
Operation guide:
1. The purpose of encouragement is to strengthen the baby's good behavior, so the more specific the praise, the better. We will find that once we point out what behaviors children have? Is there any progress? The child will follow these codes of conduct in the future, he will volunteer, and our parenting process will? Labor-saving and effective? . The encouragement of a certain detail is often low-key, such as? I'm glad you took the initiative to help my mother make the bed this morning. Thank you. ? It's very kind of you to help mom set the dishes and help grandpa when you go downstairs! ? Low-key specific encouragement sounds casual and kind, but specific low-key encouragement doesn't sound good? Fake? .
2, the baby tried to wash socks with small soap, maybe because this is a kind of? Brand-new game? ,? Interesting, right? If you make a fuss and reward him with a remote control car, maybe the baby will ask you for a toy car to wash the handkerchief next time. Under this utilitarian purpose, the fun of playing freely with soap and water will be greatly reduced. Don't link material rewards with your baby's desire to do things. Next time, will he have it? Hey (wash) brush? Desire, say to him, You are so capable and can do things by yourself, which really makes mom very happy. Besides, washing socks is also very interesting. ? That's enough.
The way a good mother educates her children is 1. Rejection is a compulsory course for children.
? Mom, I don't eat this dish! ?
? Mom, I still want this! ?
? Mom, I don't want to get up! ?
Do you hear children's demands every day? As a mother, how did you do it? If you don't eat this dish, why don't you fire another one? Are you ready to be busy for your children as soon as you hear them calling for their mother? If you think the child is too young and asks too much, you should satisfy him and not consider anything else. Why not try to refuse? Children's desires are endless. You bought him a car today, and he wants a big plane tomorrow. What shall we do? Are you afraid to tell the children? No? .
In fact, many times, children are unreasonable, but you are blinded by love. It is responsible to refuse children's unreasonable demands. Children have to face their own lives. How many people except you are willing to give him everything he wants? Don't worry that your child will hate you and blame you after you refuse his request. Your refusal will make children understand that not all ideas and needs will be met, which is an important lesson for children to grow up.
2. What did you do? Hate it? Children can grow up.
I know a mother who says that children always clean the room and wash socks at home. She never checks her children's homework or helps them pack their schoolbags. The child's primary school has never been answered. I envy her chic, but I also feel uneasy. Isn't it annoying for children to do this? She smiled. Are you afraid that children will hate you? So what if he hates it He got exercise and grew a lot. .
Yeah, what does it matter to be hated? He doesn't want to do his homework, he just wants to watch TV. You can't let him succeed. He wants to go out to play at night and go to the internet bar with his friends. You can't let him go. The child will think you are annoyed, but you are just telling him that it is his duty to refuse. A greenhouse baby, his children can only open their mouths when cooking, and their clothes can reach out. How can they live independently when they grow up? So, although he hated you as a mother for a while, he will understand that you didn't deliberately not cook in the face of future storms.
Try to exercise his viability, let children accumulate experience, make children more and more independent, and know what to do in the face of difficulties; Instead of blindly satisfying the child's requirements, indulging the child too much and taking care of everything for the child, when he encounters difficulties, he does not think about solving them himself, but cries and escapes to your arms, and it is too late to push him out again.
3. Really? Hate it? Also deeply loved.
When I was a child, I sometimes hated my mother. She often asks me to cook at home on the pretext of getting off work too late. At that time, I really hated cooking, and by the way, I hated my mother. But then I worked alone outside and cooked for myself in another way. I would especially thank my mother.
Later, I had my own children, and I tried to be my mother. I want the child to fly high, so I can't break his wings first. I'm not afraid that children will hate me. I prefer to guide him to do something, so that he can learn to take care of himself and know how to survive. I don't want to see the future child tortured by reality, so I hope he can learn everything that can be taught in advance. I understood and accepted my children's unkindness to me in this process before studying. At least I'm not afraid to be that annoying mother.
Now that the child is still young, he may sometimes fail to understand your strict requirements for him, and he will be depressed because you refused one of his requirements and feel that you are very annoying. But ah, that's all right. What you are doing now is not to make him understand, but to teach him to live. One day, he will stand in front of a war-torn life and thank you because of you? Hate it? He learned the courage to face it.
4. Is it a child after all? Hate it? Mom, is it best to be a child? Good mother? .
Love can be expressed in many ways. Hate it? This is a deeper love. Let go and let the children try to do something within their power. What if they don't like it for a while? Life won't always make him immature. Before he is really injured, his mother will help him become a soldier.