If you are too relaxed when you are young, it is easy to form bad habits. When I grow up, I want to be strictly disciplined. Bad habits become "natural" and it is difficult to correct them. As Wang Yangming said in the Ming Dynasty, "A good teacher and a good friend should not be encouraged, and heavy rewards and punishments should not be corrected." Not only is the effect not good, but if it is forcibly corrected, it is easy to cause conflicts among children and create a gap between parents and children.
3. In the past, the tradition of family education in China was "loose first and strict later". Yuan Cai in Song Dynasty pointed out in Yuan Fanshi that when children were young, China's parents often let themselves go and let them do whatever they want. When children make mistakes, they don't criticize, but accuse and criticize others. This is called "love", that is, doting; When children grow up, they will "gradually fall in love" and make a fuss about one of their shortcomings. Sometimes there is nothing wrong with children and they are very picky. This is called "false hatred", but they are too harsh. Doing so will definitely lead to confrontation, and there will never be the initiative in education.