"Okay, mom. I will put my things away. " Brother Ji answered his mother neatly.
Twenty minutes later, the mother walked out of the hall and saw her son still drawing and didn't tidy up the things in the hall.
"Didn't I just ask you to put your things away? Why hasn't it been confiscated? Hurry up and tidy up, and then go back to the study to draw. I want to clean the first floor first, and then go up to the second floor. "
An hour later, the mother cleaned the first floor, and when she walked to the second floor, she found that the child had not cleaned yet.
"I didn't tell you to pack your things? How dare you! It's annoying that you still don't know how to clean up after repeated urging! /kloc-0 0 years old. What can you do? I don't get as many points as others in my study, and I can't even put my own things well. You are getting more and more disobedient. "
In fact, if you were a child and heard your mother talk like this, would you listen? Will your heart be comfortable? This situation is not uncommon in many families. We can imagine that the child's mother can't make the child listen to her at all, but it reduces the possibility of the child's obedience and makes the child complain about herself.
In reality, no child can completely abide by the rules made by adults. Of course, the goal of our education is not to destroy children's own strong will, nor to cultivate children into people who have no personality and blindly obey. Is to cultivate children's correct judgment.
Communicate with your child in this way, and the child will listen to you: you talk to your child face to face, and the child will listen to you.
Remind the child to look at the child's name and make eye contact, and give an order at close range. The child's mother should put down her mobile phone and walk in front of the child. Instead of giving instructions to children from a distance, it has no effect at all.
Tell your children what to do. Speak with respect and firmness. "Brother, you haven't finished. How long will it take? Mom wants to clean up, you have to put away your books and learning tools. "
Stand by and wait for the result. When you finished speaking, you stood by and looked at the child quietly for about 15 seconds.
Many parents will say that my children don't listen to you, even if adults say it many times, he won't listen, so this rule of 15 second is useless to my children at all.
Dr. Luther Buckley believes that when children don't listen to their parents, parents can skillfully repeat their demands.
Repeat what we have done before, and repeat our own requirements. When we adults give our children 15 seconds to think, but the children still don't listen, we continue to repeat what we just said: eye contact. ...
Tip: When parents repeat the request, remember that it is not a sharp tone of questioning or accusing. Parents can repeat their demands louder.
When children don't carry out their own requirements, adults announce the consequences in time. Many people believe in "stick education". In fact, children can only remember the pain at that time, but they can't accept what adults say from the heart. Adults will announce the consequences of not listening in time, children will take it seriously, and what they say will make them remember what I should do next time. ""Brother Ji, you haven't packed your things yet. I will sweep them all away when I clean them. "
Adults should be responsible for what they say, and they should not be soft-hearted because they are their own children. Of course, after the children have carried out their own requirements, we can also praise the children: "Brother Ji, thank you for putting your books away, so that it will be much easier for me to sweep the floor."
As children grow older, they will become more and more individual. Have you ever felt anything was not pleasing to the eye because your child was disobedient?