After watching the video, Bian Xiao was also surprised out in a cold sweat. The child jumped directly under the bridge without hesitation. There is a certain reason for the child's excessive behavior. This needs to reflect on parents' education methods. Today, parents still believe in the ancient stick culture. In Bian Xiao's view, there are mainly two kinds of stick culture, one is to really hit with a stick, and the other is to use language violence. There is no denying that the child's mother loves the child deeply.
But in fact, the child has lost his life. We have to re-examine "the stick makes a dutiful son, while the spoil makes a rebellious son" to discuss how to educate children. Confucius said: "At the beginning of life, human nature is good." Everyone is born blank, and it is parents who really play a guiding role. What parents look like, children are largely what they look like. There is no doubt about this, and what is even more outrageous is that this proverb has risen to the golden rule.
Nowadays, when parents communicate, there is always a dutiful son under the stick. It seems that parents are superstitious about this "stick makes a dutiful son". Stick education, on the one hand, depends on military conquest, on the other hand, it needs verbal violence. Either way, it will hurt the child's heart. The final outcome is that children will form a deformed cultural cognitive view. If it is more serious, the child will be depressed. The child quarreled with his classmates at school and was scolded by his mother when he came back, which led to tragedy. In fact, parents should reflect on whether their children have mental illness.
I have personal experience of Bian Xiao's depression. The most obvious thing is that he is not good at communicating with people, and his personality is withdrawn and easily isolated, and his interpersonal relationship is very bad. But more parents will let their children take responsibility first. How much is the child's mind? It is the rebellious period of youth, and it is understandable that children have excessive actions because of possible depression. We really need to reflect on "the stick gives birth to the dutiful son, while the pampering gives birth to the rebellious son". Is this correct? In Bian Xiao's view, we must treat this old saying dialectically.
This old saying highlights the problem of children's education, affirms the harm of doting and doting on children, easily makes children hide something, and finally produces rebellious psychology. How did this dutiful son come out? In the eyes of the ancients, it is to rely on this stick for education. Facts have proved that stick education is a backward way. Although today's families are mostly only children and rarely fight, they will use verbal violence to hurt children invisibly. To some extent, as a variant of stick education, "language violence" makes children collapse more than stick education.
Therefore, from the incident of Shanghai 17-year-old boy jumping off a bridge, we can see that "the stick makes a dutiful son and pampers a rebellious son", which should be viewed separately. How to separate? You can't spoil children too much, and you certainly can't spoil them. How to educate? Facts have proved that stick education is not conducive to children's growth and will kill children's nature to some extent. The real way of education should be emotional, rational and gradual. This is quite helpful for children to form a correct cultural cognition.
Although this matter has passed for a long time, it has no timeliness for some people, but it still has a very strong enlightening effect for us. Educating children is very important. The ancestors did give a model for reference: "A stick makes a dutiful son and dotes on a rebellious son", but it is out of date. We should treat the words of our ancestors dialectically, take their essence and discard their dross. Only in this way can children really focus on their own growth and become useful materials.