Problems and Countermeasures of Children's Education
First, children are poor in independence and always rely on others.
Niu Niu usually does everything behind adults and tells them quietly that at first parents think their children are young and timid, so they are more cautious. But it turned out that Niu Niu was not timid outside. Even in a home where there are no strangers, she will get into her father's arms and tell her quietly that she wants to eat pears. Dad asked her to go to the kitchen to wash two pears by herself. At this time, Niu Niu tried to rub them in her arms. Timid? Problems gradually develop the psychology of relying on others.
I remind: first of all, children are attached to their parents before they are two years old. After cultivating parent-child relationship, parents should pay attention to cultivating children's initiative and independence. Step one, eliminate what dad sets for his children? Superman? Feel, let the children know that if you want to achieve something that mom and dad can't do, you have to try it yourself. Mom and dad can pretend to be weak at this time, so that children have a sense of responsibility. The second step is to build up self-confidence for children and encourage them to do it themselves. Without self-confidence, children will never take their own steps, towards the distant.
Second, the child refused to communicate with me.
Dad Bao hit his son again yesterday. It turns out that Mao Mao always dislikes talking to his father. When his father asks any questions, he either walks away or says he doesn't know. Dad Bao is only in his thirties. Is there a generation gap in his own reflection? How could a child be so obvious, so he cleaned up his son.
I remind: first of all, this can't solve the problem. It is important to ask yourself, is the child refusing to communicate with you just for one thing or for many things? Did you refuse to communicate recently or for a long time? These are the first questions we need to ask ourselves when others refuse to communicate (whether children or couples). Don't rush to ask each other the answer. Try to look at the problem from the other side's point of view. When you change your perspective, the other person's world will become clearer in your mind. At this time, communication will make children feel your understanding and tolerance. Communication is an ability. Some parents always feel that they get along with their children day and night and know them like the back of their hands. Actually, it's not. Many parents know their children well? Blind spot? .
He doesn't like going to kindergarten anyway.
I remind: it is normal for children to adapt to the new environment, and parents must communicate with teachers in time. Moreover, don't feel bad, children have strong dependence. Choose a good kindergarten first, and then you can stay with your children for a long time at the beginning. When he feels the environment is safe, it is not too late for his parents to leave. Sometimes there must be something he doesn't like, such as the teacher saying that he doesn't get along well with children. Parents should communicate with the teacher, pay attention to him in the group, set an example for him among peers, praise him or send him a small red flower, and he will be recognized and friendly by his children while becoming a teacher, so that he will put it down.
Fourth, how much is the most appropriate to develop your baby's intelligence?
This is a question that many parents will ask. Children are gifted, but when is the right time to start training? If it is too early, it will affect the child's childhood, and it will also make the child rebellious. If it is too late, it will affect the child's life. At what age is it appropriate to start?
I remind: it shows that parents are very wise to think so and will not force their children to study prematurely. If it is intellectual development, they can basically start from 0 to 3 years old. Some early education institutions also have related courses, so you can refer to them. This kind of development has no curriculum pressure, and knowledge exercises children's sensitivity and interest in music, colors and numbers, and will not cause a burden to children.
And some talents can be later, such as piano, calligraphy and so on. Generally, it can only be carried out after the child's arm has developed to a certain strength. Otherwise, they will not only fail to improve children's interest, but also have an impact on children's growth and development, and the consequences will often outweigh the benefits.
Fifth, successfully pass the resistance period before the age of three.
Children as young as three can pout and sometimes be violent. If they are angry, they will jump on their mother. It is said that children will rebel not only in adolescence, but also at the age of three. If so, how can they live in peace with their children?
I remind: children before the age of three are in the first period of resistance in their lives. Parents can't ignore it, but there is no need to make a fuss. When children curse, the best way is not to reprimand them, which will only backfire. There are two ways: one is to treat him coldly until he doesn't swear; The second is to quickly divert his attention and distract his excitement. A reprimand can deepen a child's memory and make him feel that it is an effective way to attract everyone's attention. When educating children, we should not use negative teaching materials, but use positive examples, and positive teaching materials are straightforward. For example: what kind of behavior is good behavior, baby, learn good behavior. Instead of saying: what kind of behavior is bad behavior, baby, bad behavior can't be learned.
The misunderstanding of educating children
Myth 1: Parents' goals are children's goals.
Many parents are full of expectations for their children. And this expectation, the child did not agree, and still went its own way.
Because no one will work hard for other people's goals. In fact, there are many ways to help children realize their wishes and realize our parents' wishes at the same time.
Parents want their children's grades to improve, and children expect a long-awaited gift. Achievement and talent are combined.
You can draw this gift on a piece of paper and finish it in several days. Finish a fraction every day. Over time, children will take the initiative to do what they should do when they see their wishes approaching day by day. At the moment when the wish came true, the child's grades improved and his reward was obtained. Everyone is happy! In this process, cultivate children's self-discipline, self-planning, self-management ability and anti-frustration ability.
It is wise to help children achieve their goals while putting their own goals in.
Myth 2: cram school is a good way to improve your grades.
Many parents think that their academic performance will be better after attending cram school. Actually, it's not. Usually it's just parents' self-comfort.
Now the names of cram schools are varied, and children are surrounded by layers like mushrooms after rain. Parents spend money as if they were comforted, but they didn't think of their children's hard work and depression. Children's usual schoolwork burden is heavy enough. The heavy schoolbag bent their backs.
Scientifically speaking, the cerebral cortex is not used for thinking, but is controlled by the body and emotions. When people are tired and emotionally troubled, their ability of memory, analysis and judgment will be reduced, which will not only affect their health, but also show phenomena such as weariness of learning, procrastination in learning, self-isolation and not communicating with others. There may even be extreme phenomena such as sudden death or suicide.
Happy study from the heart is the best way to improve your grades.
Myth 3: There is something wrong with the education system.
Some parents, like children, understand their children's difficulties and often criticize China's current education, which makes children complain.
Complaining is not a positive way to solve problems.
China education and western education have their own advantages and disadvantages. Objectively speaking, we should learn from each other's strengths. Looking back at history, every era has its limitations. It's no use complaining about society and system. Parents should have such a concept and vision: based on themselves and children, so that children have room for development. Any environment can help children realize their dreams.
Give children such a life orientation: all changes are opportunities, and those who make themselves miserable are angels. You are the master and control your own destiny.
Myth 4: Children with poor grades must not be smart.
Children have many abilities, including hearing, vision, language, experience, logic, social interaction and many other aspects.
School education attaches importance to examinations, which mainly assess children's intelligence in language, writing and mathematical logic. Other skills are not included in the examination. This has caused a serious misunderstanding among parents, thinking that children will not become talents if their grades are not satisfactory.
If Darwin and Einstein's mothers also listened to the teacher's evaluation of their children and gave up training, or blindly asked their children to be like other children, how many years would science stagnate? Ang Lee's math score is zero, which in no way affects his becoming a great director.
Rabbits run very fast. If you let it swim and fly, it will only drown and die.
For a child, if he gives full play to what he is good at, he will succeed.
In order to achieve satisfactory results, at the expense of damaging the child's body and mind and destroying the parent-child relationship, it is like picking up sesame seeds and losing watermelon, which will only outweigh the benefits.
Myth 5: Strict education is responsible for children.
There is an old saying: if you don't fight for a day, you will go to the house to uncover the tiles. Beating and scolding children is the lowest education. Accuse, criticize, command and preach, and then.
These methods, seemingly strict, have negative effects, and may even accompany children for life.
When there is a problem, parents should carefully analyze it. Is it a child's problem, your own problem, or an environmental problem?
If it is a child's problem, learn to accept and listen. Know what children need.
If it's your own problem, describe it objectively, don't criticize it, tell your inner feelings, such as sadness, worry and influence on yourself, and finally put forward hope. This kind of communication, children's thoughts on their parents, will get a clear judgment and understanding, and get effective communication.
Next, help the child in the way he likes.
The wisest parents, in the family, take the initiative to create a warm atmosphere, pay attention to their personal growth, set an example for their children and influence them. This is the master of nine paragraphs among parents.
Strict education, the initial starting point, is responsible for children. There is nothing wrong with this. Parents often hurt their children and destroy the parent-child relationship in the name of being good to their children.
If you can communicate with your child calmly and seriously and help your child solve the problem in a reasonable way, why get angry and blame?
Ways to help children get rid of homework problems
1. After secondary school, when children's grades are not particularly important, should they be cultivated? Do your own homework? Get used to it, so that you won't rely too much on your parents in the future. One thing is to remind parents that it is more important to cultivate their children's sense of responsibility than to give them correct answers to questions every time.
2. If there is too much homework and children are anxious, you should teach them to be calm and calm, not to panic when things happen, and to solve every problem seriously. This is an excellent opportunity to teach children how to deal with time and stress.
3. Be good at finding and using resources. For example, when my son was learning to subtract two digits, he never understood it. At this stage, I don't advocate using them. Minus sign? Words like this to teach children. So I went online to find a website about math textbooks. Finally found an animation tutorial, and the methods used complement each other; My children and I demonstrated the subtraction division part over and over again, (me! ) and he finally figured out the whole process.
The help of classmates and friends is stronger than that of parents. The communication between children is far stronger than that between elders. Especially when they sit in the same classroom and learn the same content, the communication between them is beyond the reach of adults. When my child is in middle school, I encourage him to take this kind of behavior and encourage the children to help each other and learn from each other under the supervision of the teacher. Of course, not every child can help others, but parents can't compare with them in their true understanding of what they have learned.
5. Encourage children to find their own teachers. Some teachers will devote special time to counseling, which may be before or after school, or when teachers work independently.
6. Distinguish which children need extra guidance and which subjects need help, and don't make eyes at them. Children may not be very clear about what kind of learning methods are suitable for them. At this time, you should help them find out what different methods should be used in new subjects. Once they develop the ability to solve at least one function independently, they are likely to draw inferences from others and learn from them.
7. Learning project management. When doing homework, the biggest problem is project management, especially when children are in primary school. In some classes, the teacher will divide the project into manageable, implementable and understandable steps. These methods can effectively help children's project planning and management (steps and task time limit! ), for which I am very grateful. However, once the child is not clear about the tasks planned in the project, then the child needs your help.
8. Allow children to make mistakes in their homework. Even if you find (or think you find) something wrong with your child's homework, don't correct it. If your child's homework is correct every time, then the teacher is likely to think that your child doesn't need individual tutoring, and learning (perhaps the whole class) can move on and learn new concepts; If the whole class is moving forward (and your child doesn't understand what he used to do), then you may never finish tutoring your child.
9. Children should be provided with ways to find the information they need when doing their homework and help them check it. For example, when children want to write an article about current events in Europe, I will guide them to find relevant reports from BBC instead of referring them to the international edition of local tabloids.
10. Wrong answer was provided. This method was discovered by accident when my eldest son was studying geometry in the third grade, which may be very enlightening to you. My spatial thinking ability is problematic in some aspects, so it doesn't play a role in helping children solve problems. Fortunately, the children turned to the teacher for help and found the right solution that parents like me could not find for them.
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