How to educate children, parents should pay more attention to their children after work. In the face of difficult problems, children can seek help from their parents, and the cultivation of their abilities will affect their lives. Let's share some educational knowledge about how to give children.
How to educate children 1 First of all, don't avoid children's sexual problems.
Scientific research has found that children can clearly distinguish the classification characteristics of men and women under the guidance of their parents at an early age. However, a certain degree of avoidance and distance from the opposite sex has become subconscious, so when children have any sex-related problems with you, they are often determined. Some children will think that condoms are balloons. At this time, you must not put an end to them, thinking that this question should not be asked by children or taken care of them. This will only aggravate the child's confusion, and it is very likely that curiosity will become a psychological shadow and set obstacles for future growth.
Second, read more books to popularize knowledge.
It is necessary for parents to dabble in the popularization of scientific knowledge about sex, which can not only improve their understanding of sex, but also answer their children's questions from a suitable angle. Although sexology covers a wide range of disciplines (physiology and pathology, medicine, sociology, psychology, ethics, etc. ), it is impossible for everyone to become an expert in this field, but we should dabble in as much knowledge as possible.
Third, grasp the scale problem.
Parents are worried about whether it is harmful for their children to know too much about sex. In fact, children's intellectual development is gradual, and the questions raised by each age group are different. Once understood, children will never trace back to the source like scientists. Children aged three or four may be satisfied with the answer that "babies grow like seeds in their mothers' stomachs"; Occasionally masturbating to a 13-or 14-year-old boy will not cause serious harm to his body, but it will definitely calm his restless heart. He may not ask you about masturbation again.
Fourth, do some early warning work in advance.
Sex education for children should not be too dogmatic. But in some small things that happen in daily life, educate him to do it in the right way. Premature contact with sexual behavior will cause serious harm to children's physical and psychological aspects, so children should be "warned" in time in daily life. For example, it is unfriendly to teach children the opposite sex to touch their private parts; For children who have entered adolescence, premature sexual contact with the opposite sex is likely to cause damage to sexual organs, infect many diseases, and may lay hidden dangers for their healthy growth in the future. Only when both physical and psychological aspects are mature can we accept healthy and civilized sexual life; Learning to live an honest and clean life is safer than learning to use condoms, and so on.
Fifth, guide children to face up to sexual problems.
There are many books and reports on the market that violate the purpose of sexology. Instead of simple sensory stimulation, when children inevitably come into contact with these things, don't simply yell at them, but analyze the exaggerated, false and other unscientific contents reflected in these descriptions, so that children can understand what is real science and health.
There are four doors to children's sexual enlightenment.
Children's sex education can't be spent in parents' concealment and lies as before. In the past, children were exposed to less pornographic information and had little influence, but now children are different. Due to the development of communication tools and the rapid development of the Internet, the speed and scope of information dissemination are getting wider and wider. At that time, there will be a lot of bad information around the child, which will lead to the precocity of the child, and the sex education of the child will be put on the agenda. Today, I will teach parents how to educate their children about sex to ensure that their sexual psychology will not be distorted.
How to educate children II. Let children face sex frankly.
Children's curiosity about sex is understandable. The key is whether we can guide children to face curiosity in a scientific way. Sex education in China has always been in a closed or semi-closed state. Parents and teachers mostly take blocking instead of dredging, preventing instead of guiding, hiding instead of teaching to deal with those sexual problems encountered by children. This situation often leads to juvenile sexual crimes, unhealthy sexual behaviors and many social problems.
Children are in adolescence, and their outlook on life and world has not been formed, and their ability to distinguish things is limited. At this time, it is necessary to let them know about sex through normal channels, strengthen their own prevention and avoid sexual harm. If we are vague, evasive or even unable to face up to it, we can't talk about sex with our children calmly.
Therefore, through sex education, children can face sex with a very frank attitude from an early age and avoid detours and misinterpretations in the process of sexual psychological development. At home, if parents don't take the initiative to communicate with their children regularly, it will be more and more difficult for children to open their hearts to their parents and bring up sexual things after entering middle school.
It can be said that parents are the first teachers of children's sex education. But remember, parents should not only educate their children about sex, but also set an example and pay attention to their words and deeds.
How to talk about sex easily
If you are embarrassed about this topic, read some related books and talk to your trusted friends. The more you know about sex, the more you will believe that you can talk about it. Even if you can't get rid of your embarrassment, or you don't have enough sexual knowledge, you should communicate honestly with your child. Don't expect yourself to answer all the questions raised by your child. Your answers to them are much more important than how many answers you know. If you make them feel that there is nothing they can't talk about in this family, then all communication will be smooth.
Targeted, take the initiative to lead to the topic
If your child hasn't asked questions about sex, then you can find an appropriate time to raise related topics. Especially after the child enters adolescence, parents should talk openly with their children about pregnancy. If there is no chance, you might as well find an excuse, such as "Have you noticed that David's mother's belly is getting bigger and bigger?" She's going to have a baby. Do you know how the child got into her stomach? "So, the conversation between you can start from here.
Talking about emotional responsibility related to sex
Children not only need to understand sex from a physiological point of view, but also need to understand the sexual relationship closely related to care, care and responsibility. Discussing the emotional components in sexual relations with children can help her (him) make better decisions and bear the pressure from peers in her future life. If your children have reached puberty, you need to tell them that sexual behavior contains responsibilities and consequences. For example, conversations with children aged 1 1 and 12 should include unplanned pregnancy and how to protect themselves.
Provide accurate sexual knowledge in time.
When talking about sex with your child, you should pay attention to the content of the conversation to suit your child's age and growth stage. If you 12-year-old children ask, "Why do boys and girls have great physiological changes when they grow up?" You can say something like this: "Everyone has a special chemical component called hormone, but the hormones in boys and girls are different. So when the boy grows up, his voice will become deep and his hair will become more and more; When a girl grows up, she will become bigger and her hips will become round. "
How to educate children 3. Parents' misunderstanding of adolescent sex education.
Answer children's questions in a deceptive way.
When children reach a certain age, they often have doubts about how they came into this world. For the questions raised by children, some parents said to their children: You picked them from the mountain; Other parents said to their children: you fished it out of the sea; Some parents also said to their children: Dad planted a seed in his mother's stomach, where you germinated, and then took it out of his mother's stomach when he grew up, and so on. Some children believe it, and they don't know how people are conceived and born until they are mature. At the age of marriage, they don't know what married life is.
Avoid children's problems
Some parents take an evasive attitude when their children ask questions or knowledge about sex. For example, some children see the word "condom" in magazines or books and ask their parents what "condom" is and what's the use? Some children will ask their parents why animals do this when they see sexual intercourse on TV programs or magazines. Wait a minute. Some parents answer irrelevant questions about their children; Some parents say that children should not inquire about these things, and they will know when they grow up. Other parents take a subtle attitude towards their children's questions, fearing that their children will know about sex. As a result, the more children are afraid to know, the stronger their curiosity and the more they want to know. Children can't learn about sexual knowledge from the right channels, so they will pursue satisfaction from other channels (such as pornographic books and periodicals). ), and some children use the method of peeking at the opposite sex to satisfy their curiosity about sex.
It can be seen that incorrect sex education methods will lead to children's ignorance of sex and they don't know how to solve sexual physiological and psychological confusion; The attitude of covering up and avoiding can only increase children's mystery about sex. Teenagers may acquire sexual knowledge through abnormal channels, enhance the temptation of sex, and even lead to abnormal psychological or sexual behavior.
Shyness theory-a thousand words are hard to say.
Most parents are secretive about "sex". When children's curiosity about sex is naturally revealed, parents begin to take the initiative to "nip in the bud" and prohibit, scold or even beat and scold; On the other hand, families, schools and even the whole society have extremely harsh moral judgment "standards" on teenagers' sexual problems-as long as there is a problem with sex, there is a problem with your moral quality.
In fact, this is the prejudice of traditional education. If you want your child to pass puberty smoothly and hope that your child will have a happy marriage in the future, you must give your child reasonable and necessary guidance.
On Chastity —— Sex education is equal to chastity education.
Parents and teachers are afraid to talk about "sex" with their children, largely because of the idea that the earlier sex education is carried out, the sooner sex will happen. On the issue of sex education for teenagers, many parents always hold the attitude of "re-educating when encountering problems, without reminding in advance, so as to avoid awakening sexual consciousness prematurely". Some parents think that if there is no sex education, children may not be exposed to these things, but as soon as sex education is conducted in schools, they are interested in these things.