Young Hu Shi wrote an article about family education as early as when he was studying in Shanghai China Public College, which was published in1September 6, 908, Ten Days of Business Competition. The article says:
What is family education? This is a lesson one learned when he was young. Dear teachers, haven't you heard the proverb: "Mountains and rivers meander from small to large"; He also said that "you will be 80 at the age of three", which shows that when you are young, this is the most important thing. In the future, the achievements of great saints, heroes and heroes, or the achievements of great traitors and thieves, are all in the word "tutor", and the word "tutor" will be different in the future. Readers should know that this youth is the most important moment for a person. This kind of family education is the direction to spend this moment. I will talk about it in detail today.
Stand by and listen to me. In ancient China, we attached great importance to family education. If the son is still in his mother's arms and has not yet been born, he will receive prenatal education. Mom can't sit straight; Dare not go the wrong way; Don't listen to indecent voices; Don't swear, it's called prenatal education. When our son is born, we should choose a good nanny and teach him well. What to teach him at the age of six, what to teach him at the age of seven, what to teach him at the age of eight or nine, and be a teacher at the age of ten. Under the age of ten, this is a lesson for parents, called family education.
Readers must remember clearly that people in ancient China were brought up by their families. Readers should know that the most important thing in this kind of family education is the mother. Because the father can't often go out to work and stay at home, the mother has the responsibility to educate her son. To improve family education now, the first step is to open a girls' school.
In his article, Hu Shi emphasized that "the most important thing in family education is the mother", so "the first step to improve the current family education is to open a girls' school. "Unfortunately, Jiang Dongxiu, Hu Shi's later wife, never went to school. According to Hu Shi, she cannot be a competent mother.
Hu Shi's concept of family education has remained unchanged throughout his life. In his later years, he once said to his secretary, "If you marry a wife, you must have received a higher education; A highly educated wife has shortcomings in other aspects, but she will certainly manage her children well and educate them well. The mother is very patient, but the child can't teach well; If the child can't teach well, it is the mother's impatient relationship. "
Hu Shi and Jiang Dongxiu have three children. Although Hu Zuwang, the eldest son, received higher education, he was far from meeting Hu Shi's expectations. Hu Zuwang's achievements are not commensurate with his status as a "father's son". Hu Sidu, the youngest son, is a complete failure. He didn't graduate from two universities and had many bad habits. He was eventually deported to China by the American authorities. When her daughter Su Fei was five years old, she fell ill and died because of improper treatment.
Hu Shi is busy taking care of and disciplining children, while his wife Jiang Dongxiu has no education, so she is not very good at raising and disciplining children. Therefore, Hu Shi's words to the secretary in his later years were full of bitterness and wordless pain.
1February 5, 927, Hu Shi, who was far away in new york, wrote a letter to Jiang Dongxiu, in which he talked about his aborted daughter.
Hu Shi's concept of family education has remained unchanged throughout his life. In his later years, he once said to his secretary, "If you marry a wife, you must have received a higher education; A highly educated wife has shortcomings in other aspects, but she will certainly manage her children well and educate them well. The mother is very patient, but the child can't teach well; If the child can't teach well, it is the mother's impatient relationship. "
Winter show:
I cried my daughter today. Is that weird?
I haven't slept much these days. I have nothing to do this afternoon. I slept for half an hour. I suddenly saw Sophie in my dream. Her face is sick. I woke up soon. When I woke up, I was so sad that tears flowed into my pillow; I got up and wrote a poem, crying while writing. A year and a half later, I had to cry for her. What a surprise.
I feel sorry for her. If I had invited a good doctor to treat her earlier, she might not have died. I feel a little guilty about making a mess of her. I don't care much about children, and I don't care much about children, so there is such a thing. Today, I cried to her, blaming myself for not living with her. I will write this poem for you.
In this letter, Hu Shi only blames himself, but since he thinks that his daughter is "bad" because of improper treatment, then the father should be blamed, but the mother should not be responsible?
Hu Shi emphasized that being a mother must be patient, but Jiang Dongxiu's patience is naturally limited because of his low educational level. From the following letter to Hu Zuwang, we can learn something about Jiang Dongxiu's godson.
Wang Zu:
If you don't write to me, please write to me as soon as possible. You should study hard. If you don't listen, I'll hit you when I get back. I came out and brought you some good things.
mother
Hu Shi has high hopes for his eldest son, Hu Zuwang. 1929 On August 26th, Hu Shi wrote a letter to his eldest son, Hu Zuwang. At that time, Hu Zuwang was going to study in Suzhou.
Wang Zu:
Your mother and I are very sad that you left your family so young. But we think this is the best way for you to leave home. First, let you practice living independently; Second, let you practice social life; Third, let yourself feel the necessity of studying hard.
You can take care of yourself and serve yourself. This is an independent life. Pay attention to your diet and know your temperature. The most important thing is to be responsible. Doing your homework well is your glory; It is your own shame for the school to remember your mistakes and punish you. It is your responsibility to do it well. If you don't do well, you are also responsible. This is the first day of your independent life. You should be careful about everything.
Now you have to go to school with hundreds of people, and you have to consider how to get along with others. Getting along with people is Zhong Hequn's life. You should do your own thing, but don't interfere in other people's affairs. You should love yourself, but don't disturb others. If you can help others, you should try your best to help others, but you can't help others to do bad things. If you help people cheat and break the rules, you are doing bad things for people. Never do it.
There is a basic rule of gregarious, that is, always think of others and always think, "What if I fuck him?" "I can't stand it. Can he stand it? I don't want to, will he? " If you can think like this, you are a good boy.
You are not stupid, you should do your homework. But you know, there are many people in the world who are smarter than you. If you don't study hard, your grades will fall behind. Pass on your homework. What is this? In Class One, you should be in the first row of Class One. At school, you should be in the front row of the school. You should get the best grades in your homework, get the best grades in your behavior and become the best person in your life. This is an ambitious child. But ambition should be in your heart, in your kung fu, in your mouth and on your face. No matter how ambitious you are, don't be proud of others No matter how good your grades are, you should be modest and be kind to others. The more modest you are, the more people respect and love you. The more proud you are, the more people hate you and look down on you.
Son, you are not at home. We always miss you. You should take good care of yourself. You are from Huizhou, remember that Huizhou people stay at a respectful distance from others and take care of themselves.
Don't forget us, son. We won't forget you. Try to be a good boy.
Hu Shi's concept of family education has remained unchanged throughout his life. In his later years, he once said to his secretary, "If you marry a wife, you must have received a higher education; A highly educated wife has shortcomings in other aspects, but she will certainly manage her children well and educate them well. The mother is very patient, but the child can't teach well; If the child can't teach well, it is the mother's impatient relationship. "
However, Hu Zuwang, after all, is a child, and he didn't take Hu Shi's teachings to heart when joking. For a while, his grades were poor. In this regard, Hu Shi was disappointed.
Hu Shi is a very cultured person. He often warns others "don't show angry expression" and highly respects "tolerance". But he also said that everything can be tolerated, but stupidity cannot be tolerated. Due to the high expectations of children, when Hu Zuwang's exam results are not ideal, Hu Shi will lose patience because of impatience. He once wrote a letter to his eldest son Hu Zuwang:
Wang Zu:
Today, I received a report from the school about your grades, saying that your grades were "poor" and asked you to make up lessons in the summer vacation.
Your grade has eight "4", which is the worst grade. Aren't you ashamed? Look at that watch yourself.
What do you do at school? Isn't that how you make up lessons?
I rushed to school that day to warn you to study hard. Do you remember? I won't accept it without studying hard, and I don't have to go abroad to embarrass me.
Please show me this letter today and report to Mr. Ni, asking him to allow you to quit the tour group and refund all the fees paid. Go home today and make up lessons in the summer vacation on July 2.
It's not that I changed my goal, it's just that you didn't meet your expectations. No wonder we will.
Dad.
Although Hu Shi was restrained, there was disappointment and anger between the lines.
1938, Jiang Dongxiu and his youngest son Sido took refuge in Shanghai. During this period, Hu Sidu was addicted to gambling and Peking Opera and lived in luxury. When he was short of money, he stole and sold his household goods. Hu Shi, who was far away from home, was very depressed after hearing the news. He couldn't help but teach his wife in the letter:
Winter show:
I wish you would stop playing cards. First of all, because playing cards is the most frustrating, your body is not very strong, so don't play cards too much. Second, I hope you can take care of your son at home more. The child has some bad habits. I don't trust him, so I hope you can take care of your son at home. Third, now is not the time to play cards all day. Although I can't do anything, I still want to buy some books to read, write and do more self-cultivation.
Hu Shi is Hu Shi after all. As he grew older, he became more and more aware of the importance of tolerance. He also knows that encouragement is more important than criticism for children's growth.
1939, when Hu Zuwang was studying in the United States, Jiang Dongxiu wrote a letter to Hu Shi, asking him to give it to his son. Hu Shi felt uncomfortable after reading it, so he hid the letter and gently criticized his wife in his reply:
Dong Xiu, you always blame your son. This is not right. Now that you are old and understand a little, I advise you not to scold him all the time. Think about it, who likes to read such a reproach letter? So I told him about his friend Li Jun in your letter, which was originally for me.
I feel sorry for you two, two sons. Looking back now, I really want to write the report, but I am afraid it will be too late. In the future, you and I will change our attitude and treat our son as a friend. I'm too old to scold.
Worried that Si Tuleideng would continue to study in Shanghai, Hu Shi later managed to arrange for him to study in the United States. Unfortunately, while studying in the United States, Hu Sidu was still keen on gambling, and his grades were always poor, and the relationship between father and son was very stiff. Hu Shi's special nurse, Miss Hard Man, wrote to Hu Shi, urging him to be gentle with his son:
Hu Shi's concept of family education has remained unchanged throughout his life. In his later years, he once said to his secretary, "If you marry a wife, you must have received a higher education; A highly educated wife has shortcomings in other aspects, but she will certainly manage her children well and educate them well. The mother is very patient, but the child can't teach well; If the child can't teach well, it is the mother's impatient relationship. "
Stu's class starts at 14, so you might want him to come and see you. Of course, the purpose of his coming is to see you before you go home. Your conversation and his letter can explain everything. He will stay with us when he is in new york. I hope you can invite him to visit you before he goes back to school. I guess he is very eager for your approval and advice. I think the time is ripe. It's time for him to really communicate with you. It will also help him find a place to rest when climbing the ladder of life. Since I knew him, he has matured the most in this lost stage. If you can do it, don't let him be afraid of you. When you meet him, the atmosphere will be much better than before. Stu was disappointed. When he matures, you won't have time for him.
The messenger Hu Shi realized that his son was a failure. As a parent, he has to take on more responsibilities, so his attitude towards his youngest son has changed a lot. 1June, 946, Hu Shi wrote the following words in his diary:
It was too hot to read in bed last night, but I didn't fall asleep until two in the morning. It suddenly occurred to me that I would graduate from junior year today. Today is Father's Day in America. I'm ashamed that I didn't do my duty to my two sons and a daughter!
Get up at two o'clock and write a telegram to San Xiao: Congratulations! Whatever happens today, my dear father. No matter what happens today, congratulations! Love your father. (
In his later years, Hu Shi often thought of the thoughts of his son Du. 196 1 04 May 14, Hu Shi told his secretary about his youngest son:
/kloc-On Father's Day in 0/946, I thought of my second son, Stu, and I sent him a telegram. He is studying at Indiana University. But he didn't go to class at all that semester. He robbed me of all the money I gave him, and he was heavily in debt. As a result, he was arrested by the police almost twice for inspection, and then a friend of mine saved him. His two pockets are full of pawns, one of which is a pawn ticket for the typewriter I gave him. This son is five feet seven inches tall, one inch taller than me and two inches taller than the eldest son, with wide shoulders and thick back. Meng Zhen has broad shoulders, so Meng Zhen likes him very much.
Although Si Tuleideng failed in studying and was sent back to China, Hu Shi was disappointed and disappointed, but he still treated his son with tolerance. He said, "I don't blame him when he came back later."