Generally speaking, personality education is to cultivate children into real people, that is, to teach children to "learn to be human." 2 1 Century International Education Committee put forward that the four pillars of contemporary education are "learning to seek knowledge, learning to do things, learning to live together and learning to be a man". Learning to be a man is a basic process based on the first three kinds of learning, and it is the fundamental goal of education and learning. Therefore, a main line of family education, a backbone, should also be to cultivate children into "people." "Man" here refers to an individual with good moral character, independent consciousness, good interpersonal relationship and good cooperation, and is an independent and gregarious social person. Family education is such a personality education.

From the psychological structure, personality mainly includes self-awareness, ability, temperament, personality, interests, needs, attitudes, beliefs, value orientation and other factors. It is the different combinations of personality factors and different performance levels that make everyone behave as different individuals, and each individual is distinguished from each other through this different performance. For example, in real life, we find that some people are cheerful and can actively cooperate with others, communicate happily, make continuous progress and improve themselves; Some people are aloof and indifferent, treat people and things negatively, and feel depressed. The former and the latter are some manifestations of sound personality and imperfect personality. So, where does a sound personality come from?

In family education, there are many factors that affect children's sound personality. This paper focuses on the influence of parents' personality characteristics, parenting style and family environment on children's personality construction.

First of all, among many factors in family education, parents' personality factor is the core strength of teaching, which has a great subtle influence on the formation of children's personality. Because children are very imitative, their attitudes and ways of dealing with people all their lives are directly imitated from their parents. Parents' personality characteristics will also radiate to all levels of family life, endowing family life with unique colors, and then affecting the formation of children's personality. If parents are warm and frank, and do things conscientiously and practically, there will often be a harmonious family atmosphere, and children will easily form warm, honest, friendly and good at communication when they are in frequent contact with relatives and friends. If parents are narrow-minded, calculating and scheming, and their children are exposed to the family life atmosphere of greed and cheapness for a long time, it is easy to form the habit of being a petty citizen and selfish, and it is also easy to form the habit of opportunism in the future. At the same time, the educational quality of parents and the ability, knowledge and concept of educating children also directly affect the development of children.

Secondly, the family rearing pattern is another important factor that affects the construction of children's sound personality. Family rearing pattern is the combination of parents' personality, parents' attitude towards children and educational methods. Generally speaking, family rearing patterns can be divided into

Authoritarian, protective, laissez-faire, democratic and mixed. Obviously, democracy is the best of all family education methods. Parents of democratic families believe that children are not only members of the family, but also members of the country and society. In the future, he will always live independently and go to society. He should teach his children the ability to take care of themselves from an early age, instead of doing everything with respect and affection. However, in the family education of the only child in China, there are still many protective parenting styles, resulting in unhealthy personality such as strong dependence, easy resistance, willfulness and loneliness.

Third, the family environment plays a key role in the construction of children's sound personality. "Home" is the cradle of children's growth, and children's life growth will always be branded with the environment. As far as the family education environment is concerned, it includes both the material environment and the spiritual environment within the family. The material environment does not refer to the luxurious decoration of the family, but a clean, orderly, healthy and uplifting environment. Children should have their own world and activity time. The spiritual environment of the family has many contents, including family cultural atmosphere, value orientation, interpersonal communication, family style and family atmosphere. The spiritual environment is more important to the development of children's personality.

Good family education has a positive effect and far-reaching influence on shaping children's healthy personality. Therefore, as qualified parents, they should pay attention to their children's growth from the following aspects.

First, pay attention to children's overall health and promote the construction of children's sound personality. "Overall health" refers not only to physical and physical health, but also to mental and spiritual health, that is, personality health. In 198 1, the World Health Organization defines health as: "Health refers to being able to engage in daily activities with energy and agility, without feeling overtired, and being optimistic, energetic and easy to bear pressure." Nowadays, many children's unhealthy problems are caused by unhealthy lifestyles and inappropriate parenting styles. For example, parents' excessive expectations bring too much hopelessness, parents' excessive protection brings too much incompetence, parents' excessive doting brings too much ruthlessness, parents' excessive interference brings too much helplessness, and parents' excessive accusations bring too much helplessness. It is precisely because there are so many excesses that children have too many obstacles.

Especially in recent years, with the accelerated pace of life and the intensification of social competition, psychological problems among teenagers have spread and increased. The media has repeatedly reported a series of events that should not happen because of the weak psychological endurance of primary and secondary school students, which has sounded the alarm for us. As parents, we must pay enough attention to this and help our children maintain their mental health. In addition to the psychological barrier caused by the lag of ideas, another killer of children's mental health is unhealthy lifestyle. In family education, parents should pay special attention to cultivating children's good and stable mood and optimistic and cheerful personality, persist in exercising, strengthen their physique, improve their quality of life, change bad behavior habits, and develop good study and life habits.

Second, pay attention to cultivating children into honest and useful people.

Noble morality is the foundation of being a man, and honesty is the foundation of morality. To "learn to be a man", we must first learn to be an upright person. Tao Xingzhi said that "teaching thousands of people to seek truth and learning thousands of things to be a man" means learning to be a man.