The importance of praise:

As the saying goes, good children are boastful. Psychology shows that praising children often plays an important role in cultivating children's good morality and behavior and establishing self-confidence. Our parents and teachers should use praise more. Praise must be more than criticism. But be careful when using praise methods. If praise is excessive, it is not praise, but flattery, which is not only ineffective, but also makes children think that we are lying, so our education will lose its effect. How to boast?

1, do more developmental evaluation of children's behavior, not freeze-frame evaluation;

2, praise should be specific and small: praise is not a big talk, parents should carefully observe some small things in their children's lives and find places worthy of praise;

3, praise should be timely: praise should be "strike while the iron is hot", and it will be ineffective if you miss the opportunity to play Yang;

4. When praising, don't easily give your child some promises that you can't make: keep your word, if you really promise your child, you must do it;

5. Don't confuse doubt with praise: praise should be based on trust, and don't add "Did you really do this?"

6. Don't make it too difficult for children to get praise: it will make children lose confidence and enthusiasm.

Second, criticism and punishment should be artistic:

Criticism and punishment can restrain children's bad habits to a certain extent, but criticism and punishment are like a sword. If used improperly, it will hurt children's self-esteem and stimulate their rebellious psychology. In fact, it is impossible for every parent not to criticize their children when they grow up. The key is how to criticize them in order to receive good educational results.

(a), natural consequences punishment law:

This is an educational method put forward by Rousseau, a French educator: when a child's behavior is negligent or wrong, parents should not criticize the child too much, but let the child bear the direct consequences of the negligence or mistake independently, so that the child will be unhappy and psychologically punished for his colleagues who bear the consequences, thus causing the child to regret himself, and consciously make up and correct the mistakes.

How to use the punishment method of natural consequences;

1, make children responsible for their actions.

Learning to be responsible for your actions is an important step for every child to grow up. The purpose of the Law on Punishment of Natural Consequences is to let children realize the natural consequences of their actions, so as to know that they should be responsible for their own consequences. In the process of using this method, parents should reduce their interference in their children's behavior and let them choose freely, so that children will promptly advocate the consequences of their own choices. If parents always nag and complain, children will divert their attention and feel that it is most important that they are not condemned, so they will go against their parents.

Parents should remind their children, but don't teach them lessons.

Using the natural consequence punishment method, parents can tell their children the truth and let them know the possible consequences of a certain behavior. When children have some bad behaviors, parents can remind them, but don't teach them lessons, because the consequences caused by negligence will give them appropriate lessons.

Parents should be firm and caring when using this method.

Some parents only remember to punish their children when educating them in this way, so they often give up their parents' due love, but they are too strict, scold their children loudly and get angry. Such education is no longer a punishment for natural consequences, but a punishment. These irrational practices of parents may hurt children's hearts and also cause some rebellious behaviors. When parents who know how to educate criticize their children, they are full of love, kind in tone, but firm in attitude.

(2) The premise of punishment is respect. Punishing children must respect their personality and safeguard their self-esteem.

1. Don't beat and scold children. Beating children is not an advisable educational method. When parents beat and scold your child, the child will often show fear and even ask you to correct it. These behaviors are actually not what the child wants to change, but the normal reaction of the child seeking protection. Other parents beat their children when they saw their mistakes, and they felt distressed when they did, and they took the initiative to apologize to their children. This will not only fail to play an educational role, but may encourage children's bad emotions and make the party in the cracks lose its prestige.

It's not a good idea to scold children for not hitting them. When parents are angry, they can scold whatever they want and whatever they say, so they will scold some insulting language, which will not cause physical pain to the children, but it will do great harm to the children's mind and seriously hurt their self-esteem.

Children who are often beaten and scolded usually have three manifestations: first, they are timid and have no self-confidence; One is that it doesn't matter about anything, not afraid; There is also a manifestation of rebellion against parents, which is very rebellious. Therefore, punishment must be carried out on the premise of respecting children's personality and maintaining children's self-esteem. Education is a kind of awakening, awakening people's potential. When punishing a person, the most important thing is to awaken people's self-esteem and self-confidence, so that children can understand that excellent children will be punished if they are wrong, and punishment is to become better.

3. Don't use corporal punishment, but use educational punishment, such as warning, criticism, temporarily prohibiting children from engaging in favorite activities, and natural consequences punishment.

(three) the standard of applicable punishment:

1, the premise of punishment is to affirm the child: parents should believe that the child is a good child.

Every child has advantages worthy of praise from his parents. If parents want to punish their children, they must first believe that their children are good children in their hearts, which is why they should be strict and let their children have a certain degree of self-confidence. At the same time, when parents punish their children, they should also explain their inner feelings to their children and let them know that they are not useless in the eyes of their parents.

2. Children should be punished in time after making mistakes.

3. To explain the reasons for punishment to children, parents should make clear requirements to their children at ordinary times: parents are advised to make clear their hopes, requirements and rules to their children and reach a consensus or even an agreement with them.