Intergenerational education is a problem that many parents are struggling with now. I used to be ambivalent myself How to choose economy and companionship?

Personally, I feel that intergenerational education will have the following disadvantages, which is not conducive to children's growth:

First, there are great differences in parenting concepts.

For many elderly parents, if they have experience, then this experience is decades ago, and how much it suits modern life depends on different people. Moreover, some old people have no experience in raising children, and the children are raised with the help of their parents, so they have no experience in raising children. But if the elderly can keep pace with the times, the conflict of parenting ideas will not be too great, because they are willing to accept new things and learn. If the old people just hold the old ideas and are unwilling to listen and learn, there will be great differences on parenting.

Second, "every generation of parents" spoil their children as "Xiong Haizi"

"Stepkin" is a common phenomenon. In fact, it is also a normal psychological phenomenon. Why does this psychology appear?

First of all, this is a kind of psychological compensation. Many old people are busy with work when they are young, and they don't spend too much energy and time on their children, so they also feel guilty. When these elderly parents take care of their grandchildren, they will try their best to meet the needs of their young grandchildren and make up for what they owe their children.

Secondly, when an old man faces a very young child, they will naturally give birth to a kind of love, so they are unwilling to punish the child's mistakes. However, this way of over-satisfying children's requirements and not establishing norms and bottom lines for children's behavior will eventually become a kind of doting and spoil children into a Xiong Haizi. Spoiling children is the biggest headache for parents.

Third, children are closer to the elderly and become the knot of many mothers.

Some children's parents are very busy, working overtime on business trips and not seeing their children for a few days. Even simply put all the children in the custody of their parents and rarely meet them. Therefore, it will cause the phenomenon that children are not close to their parents. I met a friend, and she told me sadly about her distress: she worked in a bank, busy and stressed, and had little time to take care of her children, and her mother helped her take care of them. One day, when she took her children out to play, the mother bought an ice cream for her children. The child rushed to grandma and said, "grandma, you try first." Everything I eat will be given to my favorite person first. " After hearing this sentence, the mother of the child was very lost. Several times, she wanted to get rid of all kinds of dinners and go home with her children, but the children said I didn't like being with my mother. In the evening, she wanted to sleep with her children, who cried like tears and said, "I just want grandma." Mother felt very sad after hearing this. She recalled that a few days before giving birth, she kept working and even returned to her post before her health recovered, in order to give herself a better life and set a better example. As a result, her children were not with her.

Children do not live with their parents. For fathers, they often don't care much about this problem. They even think it's the same to be close to the elderly. Anyway, they are all relatives. But this is a very sad thing for mothers, because only mothers can understand the birth of this little life, to endure the pain of flesh and blood, and then to say goodbye to their children. If children don't kiss their mother, their mother will be very sad.

Fourth, the acceleration of children's physical and mental aging

Children are active by nature. In addition, children naturally like to imitate everything around them, and the words and deeds of the elderly will certainly have a certain impact on children. Children get along with the elderly for a long time. Learning the words and deeds of the elderly will definitely make children lose their natural and lively nature and get old prematurely. Secondly, because the elderly are quiet, they usually like to stay at home with their children, so that the children will lose the opportunity to communicate with their peers and develop their movements. In the end, the children's body, mind and body movements will not be well developed.

Fifth, the ancestors lacked educational awareness and improper educational methods.

The lack of educational awareness and improper educational methods make children miss the opportunity to form excellent qualities such as love of labor and humility. When parents impart knowledge to their children and meet their requirements, they often consider whether it is conducive to their personality growth and whether they can cultivate their good moral character. Of course, grandparents also attach great importance to their children's education, but they pay more attention to teaching their children to read and count, but they don't realize that they should cultivate their children's excellent personality qualities such as loving labor, humility, caring for others and persisting in activities. When children have the initial desire to work (such as children want to sweep the floor, peel beans, clean the table, etc.). ), on the one hand, they think that the child is in the way, on the other hand, they are afraid that the child is tired, so they stop them. In this way, the child's labor enthusiasm is virtually hit, and the child's labor consciousness is stifled. Over time, children are reluctant to start working. When children have disputes with their peers, grandparents always start from their children's "interests" and try their best to get back "justice" for their children.

Having said that, it doesn't mean that intergenerational education is not desirable. Everything has two sides. Intergenerational education still has its advantages, such as:

First, the elderly have enough time to accompany and take care of their children.

Old people have left their jobs, and they no longer need to be busy with their work all day. Therefore, they have enough time and energy to take care of their children, so that children have a substantial guarantee in life care and life safety. It also laid a material foundation for children to receive early education. They can listen to their children's voices patiently, communicate with them and understand their needs in all aspects. Moreover, because there is no longer the pressure of work and the drag of life, the old people are much calmer than the nervous and stressful young parents, so they have more energy and patience to accompany and educate the next generation.

Second, the elderly have practical experience in raising and educating children.

The old man successfully raised a generation of children. They have practical experience in raising and educating children. They clearly understand what problems children are prone to at different ages and how to deal with them. They know much more than their parents. Many aspects can make up for the knowledge gap between young parents in raising children and give full play to the experience advantages of grandparents. For example, some children learn to walk when they are young and often wrestle, either breaking their arms or bumping their foreheads. In these cases, young parents are usually at a loss, or send their children to the hospital for examination and treatment. Sometimes children are really afraid of trouble if they are not allowed to run around. The old man clearly knows that it is normal for children to learn to walk and wrestle. Apply ointment to the child's wound immediately after the child falls. My grandmother coated me with lard when I fell and my forehead was swollen, and the effect was wonderful.

Third, the elderly have rich social experience and life experience, which is a favorable condition for effectively dealing with children's education.

The old man has lived in this world for nearly half a century. They have accumulated rich social experience and life experience in long-term social practice, which is a powerful condition for effectively dealing with children's education problems.

Fourth, the old people themselves have a childlike innocence, and it is easy to establish harmonious feelings with their grandchildren, creating a good emotional foundation for educating children.

Children are brought up by the elderly, so that young parents can solve their worries and concentrate on their careers.

Old people's care for their grandchildren is unmatched by any child care institution or nanny, which is conducive to children's emotional stability and psychological support, so that parents can relieve their worries. Therefore, the upbringing of children by ancestors laid a "rear foundation" for young parents to devote themselves to work.

Sixth, intergenerational education can alleviate the loneliness of the elderly.

Children are lively and naive by nature. On the contrary, the old man is unhappy because he is too idle in his later years. If children live with the elderly, the elderly can gain vitality from the growth of their grandchildren and see the continuation of life; It is of great benefit for the elderly to keep a healthy mind to entertain their grandchildren.

7. Educating children by knowledgeable and talented old people can achieve a good enlightenment education effect.

In intergenerational education, children can naturally learn knowledge, strengthen their confidence and set up lofty ideals when they are with learned and talented old people. The inspiration and teaching of the elderly to children can also effectively stimulate children's brain thinking, thus achieving better enlightenment education results.

How can we give full play to the advantages of intergenerational education and reduce its disadvantages? For the problem of intergenerational education, I personally have the following suggestions, which I am also using. You can refer to them:

First, give full understanding to the elderly with children.

When we complain about the problem of the elderly taking care of their children, we should also think about their hard work. Taking care of children is a hard work, which requires a lot of energy, physical strength and time. Parents who have taken care of their children know that sometimes taking care of their children will be exhausted by their children for a day. At the same time, no parents have the obligation to help you with your children. If parents are willing to help, please treat them with gratitude. People's hearts are all meat. If you are sincere, your life will be much better.

Second, try to help the elderly take care of their children, and parents bear the main responsibility.

When it comes to taking care of children, don't entrust all the children to the elderly. Young parents should try their best to take care of their children after work. On the one hand, spending more time with children will naturally solve many problems of intergenerational education. On the other hand, from the psychological development of children, it is very important for parents to accompany their children. Because many children's emotional needs, the establishment of a sense of security, and even the formation of personality require the active participation of parents. Therefore, only by taking good care of their children and assuming the responsibility of being parents can we really solve the problems brought about by intergenerational education.

Third, for children's education, we should communicate with the elderly and try to reach an agreement.

When we communicate with the elderly, we should master some communication skills, which can not only solve problems, but also make the family atmosphere more harmonious, which is good for us and our children.

I hope the above answers are helpful to you. thank you