There are four laws to follow in family education. Many parents worry that their parenting style is not comprehensive enough. If there are problems, it means that there is still room for improvement in the growth of their children. Parents don't have to rush for success with their children. Education is a long process. Here are four rules to follow in sharing family education with you.
There are four laws to follow in family education. The first law is 1: Don't miss the best time.
The best period of early education is 0-6 years old. Feng Dequan stressed that it is often useless to miss this best period. Take listening to music as an example. In infancy, children's hearing is very developed, and they can distinguish 88 semitones on the piano, which misses the best period of music development. When they listened to the piano in their teens, they could only hear 44 semitones accurately. In middle age, it is almost "tone-deaf".
The second law: two "fates" should be conceived at the same time.
We regard health as a child's first life. For the first life, parents take care of their children in every possible way, caring for their children to eat well, dress warmly and get sick less, but they often ignore their mental health. Feng Dequan said that we regard mental health as a child's second life. If we are mentally unhealthy, it will be difficult for us to succeed. Children can benefit from prenatal education, participating in sports, learning to communicate with others, learning music and dance, artistic modeling, and planting flowers and raising small animals.
Professor Feng explained that "learning to communicate" can make children "can't recognize strangers at half a year old, but they will visit at one year old"; "Music and dance" can cultivate aesthetic feeling; "Breeding" will make children learn to love life; Sports make children cheerful, optimistic, brave and gregarious, which are the "core" of Second Life.
Rule number three: Look at pictures and read widely.
"The child is too young. It is too difficult to teach him to look at pictures. It will be natural when he goes to elementary school. " This is the general view of parents. However, Professor Feng Dequan believes that literacy and reading are very important for babies, and they will form good reading habits from an early age. Besides, literacy reading is not difficult, because for infants, literacy and literacy are the same thing. Just because parents say that their children have strong imitation ability every day, they are proficient in spoken English when they are less than one year old, but there are few opportunities to study and study, so parents need a little skill and patience.
Professor Feng advocates life infiltration method, interesting reading method and game activity method to help children read and write. Let every child be able to read at the age of three and read extensively at the age of five or six, just like learning to recognize things, walk, talk and listen to music.
The fourth rule: put character cultivation first.
As the saying goes, "Character determines fate", and a good character is the guarantee of success in life and the driving force of intellectual development. Therefore, Professor Feng Dequan thinks that character cultivation is the most important in early education. To shape a person, we should start with character cultivation. The so-called "three years old, seven years old" refers to the second gestation of personality before the age of three (the first time is in the fetal period).
Professor Feng has investigated 1000 only children in Wuchang District, Wuhan, and found that 18% of them have a good personality, 82% have a bad personality, and 25% of them are bad, willful and overbearing. He said that in family education, we should pay attention to cultivating children's "seven outstanding personalities" from an early age-happy and lively, quiet and focused, brave and confident, hardworking and kind, independent, creative and heroic when they grow up.
Professor Feng emphasized that good children are not made by beating and cursing. Family environment, parents' love, parents' words and deeds are all "potential forces" that affect children's development. No child can become a success under parents' complaints, and no child can learn well under parents' abuse. Cultivating a child depends on potential education. Parents are role models for their children.
In addition, positive hints are equally important. Negative words and deeds often hurt children's self-confidence, so give them more encouragement and support.
There are four laws to follow in family education. 2. Ten principles of family education.
First, the principle of equality.
Psychological research has proved that the equal debate between children and parents is not only a manifestation of mutual love, but also helps children build confidence, distinguish right from wrong, and enrich their imagination and creativity. The influence of "dictatorship" on children's character is disastrous. Many parents feel that children should listen to themselves and obey their own efforts to earn money and raise their children. This concept should be changed, and children should be treated as equals.
Second, respect principles.
Only when we respect our children can our children respect us. Some parents just want their children to do what they say, but they can't have their own opinions or defend themselves, otherwise they will reprimand their children loudly. This kind of child is likely to parrot when he grows up and has no opinion.
Third, the principle of emotional communication.
Many parents mistakenly think, "You have books to read, food to eat and clothes to wear. What else do you want? " But human growth needs not only material things, but also spiritual and emotional needs. Parents ignore children's spiritual and emotional needs, and children and parents have nothing to say. In the long run, it will become more and more embarrassing for children to get along with their parents.
Fourth, the principle of freedom.
Many parents are very strict in the management of their children, but they are often thankless and even cause tragedy. We should believe in children's ability and give them a space for free development.
Fifth, the principle of unification.
Family education should be unified with the school, otherwise the children are at a loss. In addition, the educational concepts among family members should be consistent, otherwise the children don't know who to listen to, and no one will listen.
Sixth, the principle of example.
Parents are the first objects that children imitate. Parents must set an example and don't plant bad seeds in their children's young minds.
Seventh, the trust principle.
Lies come from distrust. If you trust your child from an early age, there is no need for him/her to lie.
Eighth, the principle of tolerance
To err is human. Children will naturally make mistakes when they grow up. Parents should be tolerant, and there is no need to "swear at small mistakes and serve at big mistakes."
Ninth, the principle of encouragement.
Many parents have a bad habit. When their children get good grades, they will say, "Did they peek?" When the child's grades are poor, he said, "You have been so poor." Although it was a casual sentence, it greatly hurt the child's heart. Children should be encouraged more in family life.
Tenth, the principle of method transformation.
With the growth of children's age, educational methods should be constantly changed.
In short, no matter what method you take to educate your children, as long as your children feel that their life is happy, cheerful, healthy and optimistic, and they are full of love, confidence and hope for the future, then you are a successful parent.