For ten years, they have been a couple with constant contradictions.

The wife always feels that her husband has not done enough, is critical of her husband and even doesn't like him; Husband is strong and not good at expressing. Even though he loved his wife very much, paid all the money he earned and did everything he thought he could do for his family, his wife was still not satisfied. In this way, the wife's desire for control and the husband's repression and resistance have brought the two people who were originally in love to the brink of divorce. However, the couple are lucky. When their marriage life was anxious, the wife was inspired by a sentence, which made her realize her own problems and finally saved the shaky marriage.

"Just as the body needs nutrition, so does the mind. When I was a child, there was no satisfying psychological nutrition, and many people would seek satisfaction in marriage. "

Whether it is husband-wife relationship or parent-child relationship, how to get along is interesting, not boring, not wronged, and the concept of psychological nutrition still needs to be there!

So what is psychological nutrition? Instead of giving you an abstract concept, it is better to tell you the childhood stories of three famous people and feel them.

Zheng, the king of fairy tales, was naughty when he was a child and often made mistakes, but his parents never hit him. As long as he makes a mistake, let him write a check and ask him not to make it again every time. In primary school, a dozen firecrackers were set off in the classroom because of a dispute with the teacher. The teacher shouted angrily on the spot: "Zheng, you are fired, get out."

Zheng Yuanjie, who realized that he had made a big mistake, had written the test paper in advance before his father came to pick him up from school. But I didn't expect him to write a novel about the inspection. There are suspense, characters, foreshadowing, and true feelings can also make people cry.

When father Zheng Hongsheng came to pick up his son from school, there were dark clouds, but when he looked at his son's inspection, the haze on his face gradually dispersed. It was from this investigation that Hong Zheng discovered that his son might have the potential to engage in literary creation.

On the day he was expelled from school, on his way home, Zheng Hongsheng said to Zheng, "Never mind, son, I am tutoring you." Under the guidance of Master Zheng, Zheng embarked on the road of creation and gradually grew into a well-known "fairy tale king".

Xu is a rare talented woman in the entertainment circle. She is proficient in poetry and lyrics, and her calligraphy is even better, thanks to her father's devil training as a child. But when she grew up, she said from the bottom of her heart, "My biggest wish from childhood is that my father will leave me alone." The severity of his father left a deep childhood shadow on Xu. Because of her parents' aggressive education, she once felt deeply inferior. She once doubted herself and even almost gave up her studies.

A talk show host asked her, you are so excellent, will your father always praise you when you were a child? She answered "never" without hesitation. Xu's inferiority complex is deeply rooted under the influence of education. Even though I made a famous movie "Love to the Last", I still have no confidence in filming.

In this regard, Xu's explanation is that modesty is a virtue and criticism is a spur. I just want to make her better. After growing up, in order to make up for the lack of childhood, Xu's first work was Me and Dad. She created an ideal father with art, gentle and kind, and gave her daughter unconditional love.

Coincidentally, Jiang Wen, a powerful movie star, was asked "What is your biggest failure these years?" The answer turned out to be: I have always had a bad relationship with my mother, and I don't know how to make her happy to see what I have done. "

As the most individual actor and director in China, even if he won more best actors, it is hard to hide his mother's regret that he didn't approve of him.

According to his memory, whether he was admitted to a Chinese opera or bought a house, whenever he was in high spirits and wanted to share his happiness with his favorite person, his mother, he was always ruthlessly hit by the other party. So even as a celebrity, he still lacks confidence. Childhood trauma takes a lifetime to heal.

In fact, many of children's most important sense of existence and value come from their parents' affirmation and encouragement, which is the warm background of children's life and an important force to finish their life. Fixed-minded parents always turn a blind eye to their children's efforts No matter how well the children do and how much they have achieved, they will not be affirmed and praised, and eventually they will leave scars in their hearts.

Of course, neither "lack of praise" nor "excessive praise" is a good way of education! Many thoughtful parents have been wandering among them, because China has always been a "dutiful son under the stick", but in recent years, influenced by western ideas, educating children has become a love education and a happy education, rather than advocating corporal punishment.

So, for parents who have children and parents who have taken care of their children, is it ok to beat their children? A familiar nanny said, I especially regret it now, that is, I saw how the so-called experts educate their children, saying that they should be patient with them, let them grow up freely and happily, reason with them, get along with them as equals, and don't beat and scold. Now that the children are older, it is pure deception to know that listening to those experts. Why are so many children not filial to their parents now? That is, when children are young, they make mistakes. There are too many reasons and too few hits. If they make mistakes, they must be severely beaten. There is a dutiful son under the stick, which makes sense!

However, another treasure mother also said that today, when my daughter was doing her homework in senior one, I told her four or five times, sit down and do her homework, and don't stand and bend over. She ignored me and pinched her twice, then sat down and cried. After a while, it will be normal. I wonder if she is a beating type. She has a stubborn temper because she always makes me angry. Beating her and giving her a reason, she realized her mistake and promised not to make it again.

It can be seen that the most convenient and effective way for parents is to hit their children. Nowadays, some families are afraid to get close to their parents because they were beaten too much when they were young, and there is a gap between parents and children. But it also has the advantage that it won't make a second mistake.

In fact, the education of love and stick should be balanced, and children should not be treated singly. Education is diverse, and so are children, which is infinite. Education should not be too rigid. Education itself is compulsory, including disciplinary measures.

Educating children means educating children to be adults, to be human, to know honor and disgrace, and to keep the bottom line. Those who touch the bottom line must be punished, and beating is the most severe punishment. It's not that children can't fight, but that they can't fight casually. Beating children must be planned and purposeful. You can't call just because your parents are emotional. That kind of behavior is not education, but harm.

To sum up, in the process of children's growth, it is the greatest fairness and gift for children to adopt educational methods that conform to their nature and give them psychological nutrition. Encourage each other!