Family education in a broad sense refers to the purposeful and conscious influence of family members other than themselves. This kind of education is usually a long time, even affecting a lifetime. ?
Narrow family education: refers to a person's purposeful and conscious education by parents or family elders before adulthood.
The popular definition of family education in China is three kinds of education, namely, the way of life, the way of being a man and the way of learning. Short for "3M". Namely:
1. The Way to Make a Living
Taking life and health as the core, it consists of three aspects: physical health (health), mental health (happiness) and safe adaptation (safety);
2. The Way of Being a Man
Taking the value of life as the core, it consists of three aspects: life role (foundation), personality life (ambition) and social literacy (communication);
3. "The Way of Learning"
"The way of learning" takes life wisdom as the core and consists of three aspects. Namely: learning quality, comprehensive quality and independent specialty.
In 2008, Zhao Yulin, a young educator in China, put forward three theories on life development education, pointing out that family education is an activity to promote family construction and development, which can help teenagers aged 1- 18 to increase their self-worth.
Forbidden area of family education
1.
Parents always think that they have crossed more bridges than their children, despise their children, and always think that they are right and dominate their children. This kind of "high above" discipline is hard to convince children. Especially when criticizing children's mistakes, parents' condescending reprimand makes children feel unequal and difficult to balance. The result of "verbal dissatisfaction" can only be half the effort.
For example, I often tell my children that "you will be beaten if you do this" and "if you don't listen, you have to listen" and so on. "
be cynical
Child psychotherapy experts have found that parents' "cynicism" does great harm to children, especially young children. As children grow older, it is difficult to understand the hidden meaning of parents' words, which leads to confusion. Therefore, regardless of praise or criticism, parents should not be "cynical" or "punning", but should try to communicate with their children and let them know their problems clearly.
For example, "What do you think you can do?"
3. Absolute negation
Everything should be measured, and criticism and education should also be measured. It is true that children should be criticized for making mistakes, but if parents say "absolutely", it will easily arouse children's rebellious psychology and make them lose confidence. Children's self-confidence is very important, once lost, it will affect their lives.
For example, parents should avoid saying "You have never had a good meal" and "You always lie".
exaggerate
With the growth of children's age, their understanding will also improve, and they will have their own judgment on the truth of their parents' words. At this time, as parents, we should pay more attention to the authenticity of words. "Exaggeration" and "duplicity" can easily infect children and affect their future development. Praise children, according to the actual situation. Excessive exaggeration will make children more vulnerable to setbacks in future social life and unaccustomed to listening to criticism.
For example: taboo words, "You are the most handsome boy in the world" and so on.
5. Personal attacks
No matter how simple and stupid a child is, he can distinguish good words from bad words. "Bad words" with personal attacks, once heard by children, are very harmful. Children with poor psychological quality are likely to give up on themselves.
For example, parents should avoid saying anything personal, such as "You are as stupid as a donkey".
6. Threats and intimidation
This is the same as "exaggeration". Threats will only keep children away from their parents and alienate parents from their original intimate relationship.
For example, "If you don't behave well, I'll let you feed the wolves".
7. As cold as ice
Children long for warmth and fear loneliness. Cold words make children feel no love, and children feel no concern and love from their parents, which easily leads to autism and loneliness.
For example, "can't you see I'm busy?" "I'm busy, so leave me alone."
Refer to the above content: Baidu Encyclopedia-Family Education