I used the time of a class to guide the composition of this proposition. Focus on guiding students to examine questions and make ideas, and at the same time guide students to grasp the writing points of the article. Judging from the ideas that several students exchanged in class, this composition should be expected.
It takes three days to review the compositions handed in by students. Judging from this writing achievement, it is slightly better than the previous two argumentative writing. The advantages of this paper are as follows:
First, the examination questions are accurate and the thinking is clear.
The topic of this writing is a figurative one. When writing this kind of topic, we should be clear about the ontology encountered in the county. Judging from the writing situation, students' understanding of mountains is rich and varied. In their works, Shan is biased, narrow-minded and short-sighted. It is shyness and timidity in interpersonal communication; It is timid, selfish and lazy in character.
At the same time, the purpose of writing is also very clear. It is to transcend, overcome, eliminate, overcome, eliminate, restrain and conquer these ideological or personality and interpersonal obstacles. This idea is very clear and positive.
And there are several excellent works produced this time. Wang Yangxue's works, in particular, describe the efforts in the process of pursuing dreams in the style of dandelion. It shows people a high degree of optimism and ambition to climb the peak. The language is fresh, vivid and interesting.
Second, the narrative is clear, and a variety of expression techniques are used comprehensively.
This time, it is required to write a narrative, with narrative as the main expression and comprehensive use of other expressions. In the process of writing, most students can explain the narrative elements clearly and make sentences fluent. And in the narrative process, there are psychological descriptions of characters and event comments, which make the content of the article clear and profound.
In this writing process, many problems have also been exposed. Some questions have been instructed many times in the past, but this writing still exists. Some problems only appear in this writing, so it is necessary to pay attention to them.
First, the narrative process is not rigorous.
When some students are writing, they only have the finishing touch at the beginning and the end, and the main part of the narrative has nothing to do with the topic from beginning to end. There is neither a specific description of the mountain nor a clear expression of "turning" in this paper. This writing method obviously does not meet the requirements of composition in the examination room. This problem is not the first time. Although guidance has been given many times before, students still don't pay enough attention to it.
Second, the language expression is blunt and deliberate, lacking true feelings.
The purpose of writing this paper is to guide students to correctly face many difficulties and setbacks in their study in life. Mountain is a metaphor. The process of writing is to present the ontology clearly, through the narrative description of the ontology, and then naturally integrate with the jade mountain. However, when students are writing, they don't know if life is too happy and they are indifferent to the difficulties and setbacks encountered in their works, which makes it difficult for people to resonate emotionally. At the same time, the language is blunt and it is particularly awkward to read. Many students' language is fresh and fluent in ordinary writing practice, but once they have been trained in writing, it seems rigid and boring, which I am puzzled. Many students' whole writing doesn't even have a touching detail, and even the preface is incoherent.
Third, the focus is not enough and the details are not properly arranged.
Many students gave a long description of "mountain" in their writing. However, the content of the performance was turned over, but it was filmed several times. There are even students. Almost the whole article is about the "mountain" such as pressure, frustration and timidity. At the end, I only say "I managed to climb the mountain in front of me" to end the whole article. Obviously, the focus of this composition is "mountain", but the writing focus should be "turning". And this "turning" should be a hierarchical and content-based process. Here, it should be detailed.
Generally speaking, this composition is better than the first two argumentative essays. It seems that junior high school students are still good at writing narratives. This is the sixth writing this semester, and the students have been in a bad state this semester. I try my best to encourage and guide, and I also give guidance face to face. However, judging from the current writing situation, the Chinese learning in these two classes is still not optimistic.
School leaders talk about grades every day. Every time I see the gap between these two classes and the two key classes, I feel a lot of pressure. I have tried my best to satisfy the school and make my conscience pass. But the "mountain" peak in front of me is increasing day by day. How can I climb the mountain in front of me?