1. I want to educate my children to be modest and polite, but I am worried that my children will suffer.
Some families only require their children to be polite and respect others in theory, but in fact they are vigorously cultivating their selfish psychology.
When children want to share food with their parents, parents often forget their usual education. Instead, you will say that your mother bought it for you. Over time, children will naturally form the concept that "the biggest and best things should belong to me".
Parents say this and that, and the child is very confused and at a loss. I don't know how to meet my parents' requirements. Soon the child learned the bad habit of saying one thing and doing another.
2. I want to expand my children's activities, but I am afraid that my children will get into trouble.
Some parents encourage their children to play with them, use scissors and take part in various activities. However, once children fight with children, learn to swear, or cut their fingers, they will immediately put away their scissors and close the door, thinking that they should leave their children alone and feel at ease, so it is ineffective to try to cultivate children's good conduct of respecting others and cooperating with each other through preaching.
Because only in communication with peers can children get rid of the self-centered "hard shell", understand the difference between themselves and others, and understand the rights and obligations of each member of the group, so as to cultivate good qualities of respecting themselves, respecting others, understanding the code of conduct and helping others.
3. I want to encourage children to be independent, but I am afraid that children will be tired.
Parents are looking forward to their children growing up and becoming independent as soon as possible. They are looking forward to breastfeeding and weaning, crawling and running, hoping that their children can be independent, get rid of their parents' "umbilical cord" and become independent people as soon as possible.
However, when children really gradually become independent, enter a period of resistance, start to get rid of their parents' control, do things behind their parents' backs, and even want to be alone, unwilling to be interfered by their parents, but their parents are at a loss. This sense of loss and worry makes parents have an impulse to hold their children tightly in their hands, so they simply take care of everything, dress their children, feed them, tie their shoelaces and pack their toys.
In fact, to make children independent, we must let them go.
4. I want to develop my child's early intelligence, but I often give up halfway.
Many parents have a misunderstanding that early childhood education is to impart knowledge to their children and judge their intelligence by how many poems, questions and words they can recite.
So there is such a situation. Suddenly, children are asked to recite knowledge, let them recite ancient poems and show off in front of others, and then they are worried that this kind of compulsory training will have a bad influence on their growth, so they don't want their children to recite, which makes them very confused.
Some parents don't pay one-sided attention to imparting knowledge, but at the same time go to the other extreme, pursuing the development of their children's various "potentials", creating a "learning environment" for their children, and arranging various learning activities for their children, from learning English to drawing and learning to play the piano, so as to lead them around. But in fact, these requirements put forward by parents exceed the children's acceptance ability, which leads to indigestion, backfire and even panic.
Once this happens, parents' emotions plummet, thinking that the child is unbearable and blaming the child, which makes the child form a deformed psychology of pride and inferiority.
Parents' requirements for children's learning should be timely and appropriate, in line with the laws of children's individual physical and mental development, pay attention to stimulating children's interest and give lasting and consistent guidance.
Because parents' educational psychology is contradictory, it is easy to change children's educational methods, which will have a bad influence on children's physical and mental development and make children feel that the world is unpredictable and unpredictable, thus dampening their enthusiasm for understanding things and their confidence in judging things.