For example, the child you mentioned went to prison because his father broke the law, his parents divorced and followed his mother from the countryside to the city. The reason for his loneliness is actually based on his double inferiority: on the one hand, he is surrounded by classmates from the city, and he is from the countryside. On the other hand, he is in a divorced family and his father is in a lawsuit.
On the one hand, it takes a process for a child to adapt to the new environment from the countryside to the city, leaving the familiar environment where he grew up. What children need most is friendship and respect, understanding and support from others, while their partners and friends are not around. So he can't get love at school.
On the other hand, he does not have a sound family and lacks fatherly love. In this case, mothers often have two situations, either indifference and lack of maternal love, or guilt and overindulgence. Both extremes will have a negative impact on children's psychology.
Double inferiority caused his loneliness, and his heart actually needed love more. But there is no doubt that children will have problems because of the double dislocation of family and school and the lack of love. When he can't get the care, understanding and recognition he needs, his psychology will be rebellious, and he will attract others' attention through special or even bottom-line behaviors, such as provoking other students.
A key opens a lock. Such a child can't solve his fundamental problem by coaxing alone. Need to go deep into their hearts, understand the deep-seated reasons behind the problem behavior, and untie the knot. How to help him? There is no doubt that the lack of love must be repaid with love, and the rebellious heart must be alleviated with love.
First of all, we should establish a warm field where children trust and care for each other in class. Don't always persuade this child to get closer to other children. Let the children understand, trust and support each other. At this time, it is even necessary to give full play to the child's strength and let other children know about this child, so as to take the initiative to understand and take the initiative to care about this child. At this time, we must pay attention to the need to care for children's hearts with the wisdom of education. Family changes are the wounds of this child, so don't tell the story of this child directly, but read children's books about friendship and growth together. A book like One Hundred Skirts, which promotes children's communication and love, will make children empathize with love and let them learn to put themselves in their shoes. In this way, a harmonious atmosphere will be formed in the classroom, and the child will be loved and understood by his classmates, and he will really change.
As a teacher, it is more important to enter this family, understand the actual influence of mom and dad, and help him establish a positive parent-child relationship as much as possible. Although his father is in prison, he is his father after all. He can repair the parent-child relationship by visiting or communicating with his father. At the same time, we should further understand the mother's education methods. According to common sense, if the mother has educational feelings, is familiar with the laws of education and knows how to help her children, the children will not have such problems. Therefore, no matter whether the mother is indifferent or doting, she should be guided in different ways to help her correct. Behind all problem children, there is a problem family. Behind all the problem behaviors, there are profound family reasons. Due to various reasons, few teachers really visit home now, and few teachers really walk into students' families. In fact, we should encourage teachers to make home visits, especially through home visits to get to know these children better. As a teacher, when the teacher gives the child special love, the child will also have empathy. This kind of love from teachers will also make up for children's desire for fatherly love and motherly love to some extent.
Rome was not built in a day. This kind of children's problems are not formed in a day or two. Don't expect to change in a day or two, don't expect to change once or twice, and don't expect one or two things to bring them back to life. Enough patience and love can make a frozen heart get moist and warm gradually.
The problem itself is not a problem, but how to treat it is the biggest problem. Life always faces all kinds of problems. If you are afraid of problems and avoid them, problems will always be problems. If we face it bravely and try to solve it, the problem will no longer be a problem. Therefore, the problem is not terrible, what is terrible is our attitude towards the problem. Life grows by solving problems, and solving a problem is a step forward.
When children get better, I believe teachers will feel more and more happiness at the same time. Bless you, bless this child, and wish you all an early harvest of growing happiness.