Editor Zhang Ma

Children's education has always been the top priority of all parents. Many parents always feel that they will still delay their studies because of some bad habits or laziness, thus ruining their lives.

So, what can ruin a child's life? Maybe many people will say it's a computer game. The pleasure of hitting and the beautiful pictures in the game are undoubtedly things that make children indulge in it and neglect their studies. After all, children who are addicted to games are full of games when they do their homework in class, and they have no intention of learning at all. It is also said that laziness is the original sin of human depravity. Lazy children often don't like to study, and they don't study hard.

But these are all things that children can correct as long as their parents guide and educate them. In recent years, a way of destroying children is spreading, and it is difficult for many parents to find that their children are facing destruction-that is, parents yell hysterically at their children.

Why did Professor Li Meijin say such a thing? Excuse me, which parents in the world are kind to their children, how can they ruin their lives? In fact, what Professor Li Meijin means is that parents' wrong educational methods are ruining their children's lives.

The harm caused by verbal violence to children cannot be cured by time.

Safekids, a global child safety organization, has released a poster about verbal violence against children by parents.

After the first child came home with a 26-point test paper in his hand, his parents thundered, "Did the pig eat your brain?" Do you still have the face to go home after this exam? "

The second child was scolded by his mother for breaking the vase at home: "you have hands and feet every day." Were you a troublemaker in your last life? " It's really bad to have you at home! "

The third child was scolded by his mother after playing football. "I have never seen such a dirty child. Did you pick it up from the garbage? "

The producer who made these three posters wrote these words on the children, but they were engraved on the children like tattoos. Looking back carefully, don't we use language as a meat cleaver to tell these scars one by one? The harm caused by these verbal violence to children cannot be cured by time.

According to relevant research, half of children who have suffered verbal violence from their parents will become cold-blooded, one quarter will suffer from depression, and the rest will become violent. All these data undoubtedly do not tell us that the destructive power of verbal violence is enormous, and at the same time, it will also bring many adverse effects to children.

As shown in the above data, children who have been subjected to verbal violence by their parents for a long time will have distorted personalities, and it is often difficult to have a good personality, which also makes it impossible for children to correctly understand their excellent side and think that they are as bad as their parents say.

This directly leads to the child's personality becoming introverted and inferior, and even has no feelings for his parents, and develops a violent character.

In fact, "language violence" can be equated with "repressive" education. It is easy for children to lose confidence by suppressing their parents for a long time, and children will become extremely inferior and insecure, and they will deny themselves when they encounter things.

In the long run, the child will become a person without self-confidence. In the face of difficulties, he will only choose to escape and lack the courage to face them directly.

It is easy to form a habit of suppressing and insulting the parents of their children for a long time, which also puts themselves on the opposite side of their children. Parents think that children are worthless, and children also think that they are worthless. Repeated verbal violence will only push the child further and further.

As the saying goes, "a good word warms three winters, and a bad word hurts June." Bad words will only affect the parent-child relationship and make it worse. Parents may wish to change some appropriate methods to educate their children, so how should parents educate their children correctly?

Professor Li Meijin once put forward "Appreciation Education Law", which, as the name implies, is to learn to appreciate children and be good at discovering their bright spots. Parents' timely praise can greatly enhance children's self-confidence when they make progress, and timely encouragement can also enhance children's frustration when they encounter difficulties.

Parents' affirmation is the source of children's efforts. Parents' encouragement and praise can make children gain the joy of success and the courage to dare to challenge difficulties.

No one is perfect, everyone will fail and make mistakes. Parents should learn to accept their children's mistakes. It is not terrible for children to make mistakes. The terrible thing is that the mistakes made by children are not accepted by parents, so they cannot be corrected.

Parents should remember one sentence: we take one step, and children need to take three steps to catch up; The world we observe, children need to stand on a stool and watch, don't ask too much of them.

Isn't it that parents are checking their children's character when educating them? Isn't the career that children commit today the fruit planted by parents when they educate their children? Only with the continuous improvement and growth of education can children become better people.