First, "the benevolent loves others" and benevolence education.
The Analects of Confucius records: "Fan Chi begged for benevolence. Confucius said,' Love.' "(The Analects of Confucius, Yan Yuan) The benevolent loves others, which is the first essence of Confucius' thought of benevolence, emphasizing respect and care for others. Confucius regards "love" as the highest criterion of the ethical and moral standard system, that is, he hopes that people can handle the relationship between people with "goodness" and do not do to others what you don't want them to do to you. "(The Analects of Confucius Yan Yuan)" I want to stand up, stand up, and I want to achieve it. " (The Analects of Confucius, Yongye) This concept of respecting the rights of others, transcending consanguinity and loving others generally is the most basic feature of Confucius' thought of benevolence.
Confucius not only asked the people with the idea of "benevolence", but also asked the rulers to set an example and govern the country with "benevolence". He said: "A country that has gone through all kinds of hardships, respects things and believes, saves money and loves people can make time." He also said, "If you are honest, what is the political significance?" Can't be right, like a right person? (The Analects of Confucius Lutz) According to Confucius, as long as the rulers take the lead in offering love and everyone has a caring heart, it is not difficult to realize a harmonious and orderly society ruled by courtesy.
One thing needs to be clarified here. The "benevolence" advocated by Confucius is not without principles. Confucius said, "A benevolent person can love others or be wicked." Zi Gong asked him whether "the villagers are all good" or "the villagers are all evil", and his answer was: "No, not as good as the villagers, and the bad is evil." (The Analects of Confucius Lutz) Confucius also said: "Clever words make color, fresh and righteous." (The Analects of Confucius Learn from others) He called ambiguous "Mr. Goodness" such as "homesickness" a "thief of virtue" (The Analects of Confucius Yang Huo). It can be seen that the "benevolence" advocated by Confucius is a kind of rational love based on principles, and it is a virtue that distinguishes love from hate, and that those who love the good and those who hate the good are unified.
Deeply understanding the connotation of Confucius' thought of "caring for others" and looking back at the current problem of "lack of love" in the only-child group in China, we can easily draw such a revelation that "benevolence education" is imminent.
As we all know, most teenagers and children nowadays are only children. At home, the love of grandparents and dad is poured on them, and most of them are enjoying the delicious, useful and fun. Over time, they get used to it. Coupled with the commodity economy society, materialism, excessive pursuit of pleasure and the concept of money first, full of them. Teenagers and children who grow up in this environment are prone to form psychological weaknesses such as selfishness, laziness, dependence and willfulness. They have lived in a self-centered environment since childhood and lack the inner consciousness of caring for others. This "lack of love" problem is often an important reason for interpersonal conflicts and even social tragedies. In fact, the seriousness of the problem lies not only in this, but also in the family "love education" that has been neglected for a long time.
It should be noted that benevolence education is the traditional advantage of education in China and is in the most important position in family education. Parents want their children to be lucky and lucky, and to be benevolent people with universal love. However, the realization of this beautiful wish depends on the inheritance of family education. Unesco regards "learning to live with others" as one of the four pillars of education in the 2 1 century, and its importance can be seen. If parents want their children to learn to live together and get along with others, they must teach their children to respect and care for others through charity education. Learn to listen to others' opinions and negotiate with others; Learn to share and put yourself in others' shoes. Never impose what you don't want on others. To implement charity education, parents should set an example for their children. Only in this way can charity education be implemented.
Second, "filial piety first" and filial piety education.
Confucius has always advocated that "love" should start with "filial piety" and then spread the love for relatives to the society from near to far. He said, "Disciple, if you enter, you will be filial, and if you leave, you will be the first. You are sincere and believe that you have always loved people, but you are kind. " In The Analects of Confucius, Zi You explained Confucius' thought of filial piety in this way. He said: "He is also filial to others, but there are very few people who are easy to make mistakes; It's not easy to make mistakes, but it's not easy to make mistakes. Gentleman's business is based on inheritance and Taoism. Filial piety is also the foundation of benevolence. " It is not difficult to see that Confucius' thought of benevolence has distinct hierarchical characteristics. "Love" should be based on "filial piety". Only by putting filial piety first and loving family can we love others and our country. Filial piety is another essence of Confucius' thought of benevolence. It is not only the most basic moral principle that people should follow, but also plays a role in promoting social harmony and stability.
Among filial piety, Confucius paid more attention to filial piety. He believes that if a person wants to be filial, he must do the following three things: First, treat each other with courtesy. "Life is alive, and things are polite; When you die, you will be buried and sacrificed. " ("The Analects of Confucius for Politics") The second is to care about it. "In the year of parents, you must know. One is happy and the other is afraid. " The third is respect and sincerity. "Today's filial piety, that can be raised. As for dogs and horses, you can keep them. Disrespect, why not? " ("The Analects of Confucius for Politics") "Color is difficult. If something happens, the disciple will handle it; There is wine and food, sir. Have you ever thought that this is filial piety? " According to Confucius, filial piety is not a form of supporting parents at all, but whether you are sincere or not. Sincerity to parents is the most precious. If there is no sincerity of filial piety, what is the difference between supporting parents and raising dogs and horses?
A profound understanding of Confucius' thought of "filial piety first" is of great practical significance for strengthening filial piety education and solving the widespread problem of "ignoring family" in today's society. Have you noticed that in many "4-2- 1" families in China, "filial piety" has been replaced by "caring for the next generation" and "gnawing at the old" has become a common social phenomenon. Although there are many reasons, one thing is undeniable. That is, filial piety, as a traditional virtue and the lowest moral standard of being a man, is being forgotten by people; As a kind of natural emotion of human beings and the basis of maintaining social ethics and moral system, kinship is being replaced by money and lust. The resulting breakdown of family relations and even domestic violence are endangering social stability. Imagine, if a person is not filial to his biological parents, how can he care about others and make contributions to society? It is indeed time to strengthen filial piety education.
Respecting teachers and attaching importance to morality is a virtue handed down from generation to generation by the Chinese nation, and our government has always attached great importance to filial piety. There are provisions in the Constitution that "adult children have the obligation to support and assist their parents" and "maltreatment of the elderly is prohibited". Filial piety education, as a major advantage of traditional education in China, should become an indispensable part of family education in China today. Parents have the responsibility to regard filial piety as a compulsory course in educating their children and make unremitting efforts. Morally, it is a great honor for children to know that their parents have the grace to nurture and honor their parents. Morally and emotionally, let children know their parents' birthdays, hobbies, health and work, and learn to care, be considerate and understand their parents; In moral behavior, children should be respectful and sincere to their parents and consciously accept their parents' teaching, but they should not rely too much on their parents and take the initiative to share their pains and worries with them. In filial piety education, it is very important for parents to set an example. Parents should use their own practical actions to infect and influence their children, guide them to love their parents and people around them, and then sublimate into loving the collective, the country and the people.
Third, "self-denial" and self-denial education
Self-denial is the third essence of Confucius' benevolence. The Analects of Confucius records: Yan Yuan asks for benevolence. Confucius said, "Self-denial is benevolence. If you self-denial is benevolence once a day, the world will be benevolence." ("The Analects? Yan Yuan) The word "benevolence" here has two meanings: self-denial and courtesy. The so-called self-denial is to strictly demand and restrain yourself; The so-called "restoration ceremony" originally refers to the restoration of Zhou rites, that is, a set of political systems and ethical norms to maintain social order in the Western Zhou Dynasty. Today, we can understand its connotation without demanding its original meaning, but it can be understood as a necessary ethical system and code of conduct. Confucius believes that a person can be regarded as a benevolent only by restraining himself and making his words and deeds conform to moral norms.