In fact, Sima has answered this question in detail today. Please read it patiently.
Many parents think that children should "temper justice with mercy". It should not be too "wide" or too "strict", but which is in the front and which is in the back? Let me give you an example:
First lenient and then strict, children's learning goes downhill.
Many parents believe that children should relax when they are young, and become stricter when they are older. In fact, the older you get, the harder it is to manage. Yang Yang, our father downstairs, has a deep understanding.
When talking about his career, Yang Yang's father is very proud. He has always admired himself for starting from scratch, but when talking about his son, Yang Yang's father always sighs.
"I used to think that I am such a son. Don't push him too hard, as long as he is happy, but how can he fail? How many times have I been to kindergarten? "
Yang Yang's father actually works hard for his son. Yang Yang's father bought him anything he liked, but his academic performance continued to decline. Yang Yang's father had no choice, so he hired a tutor for Yang Yang, but in the end, Yang Yang left the tutor.
In fact, this is the result of lax discipline. At first, the children were not bound. The child has long been used to a free and loose lifestyle. Suddenly, he was strictly required. Children naturally began to resist. This situation can easily lead to children rejecting their parents, so parents should pay attention!
Be strict first and then lenient, and children know how to restrain themselves.
And tell you a real case. A nursery rhyme child in my bean bag class, her parents are white-collar workers, and they are busy with work every day, which is very hard. But in the education of nursery rhymes, the two of them have never ignored it.
Take the matter of signing up for an interest class as an example. Parents of nursery rhymes don't say "you should study hard, or you will be sorry for your parents' efforts" in front of their children all day.
It is to tell children that only through their own efforts can they realize their ideals in the future. In ordinary life, they never spoil their children and are strict in discipline. Nursery rhymes did not meet her parents' expectations. When she was in a small class, she would recite a lot of nursery rhymes, especially for her parents.
You see, children are disciplined strictly, and their independence is very good. They not only know how to study consciously, but also understand their parents.
Next, I will also give you three benefits of "being strict first and then relaxing". I hope parents can realize that they can take less "crooked ways" when cultivating their children.
1. "Be strict first and then loose" to establish children's values
In fact, children are most malleable when they are 3-7 years old. At this time, parents are the children's first mentor. How should you educate your child and what kind of person he will become when he grows up? At the beginning, strict education is binding on children, so children will grow in this direction, and over time they will establish correct values, and will not go astray in the future.
Choosing the education mode of "relaxing first and then being strict" will make children grow up in doting and make them lack autonomy and creativity, which will be difficult to correct in the future.
2. Cultivate children's independence by "being strict before being relaxed"
Choose strict education methods, and children will develop the habit of independent thinking. No matter what you do, you don't rely too much on others. You always think carefully by yourself. This is a good way to cultivate children's thinking enlightenment.
However, if you choose the way of "relaxing first and then being strict", children will develop laziness towards their parents. In their minds, they always think that their parents are their own backing, and they can ask their parents if they have any problems. As everyone knows, this will ruin their lives!
3. "Be strict first and then loose" conforms to the law of children's growth.
"Be strict first and then loose" conforms to the law of children's growth. Children aged 3-7 are curious about everything. At this time, parents will restrain their children and let them develop good habits. Children can be independent both in life and in study.
Moreover, children of this age are very imitative. As long as parents set an example, children will learn from their parents' advantages, and even a slight mistake can be corrected quickly.
After reading this article, I believe many parents understand how to train their children in the future.