Examples of parents' failure in educating their children 1
1, a slogan, let parents lose at the starting line.
Since the commercial society created a slogan:? The customer is God. ? Since the industrialization of education in China, a slogan has been popular in the field of education, don't let children lose at the starting line? . As if overnight, the slogan of this cross spread all over Chinese mainland like the wind, and it also blew countless parents at a loss.
Under the guidance of this slogan, many families harvest not happiness, but pain and anxiety.
There was a very young mother in Guangzhou who started to cry when she saw me. She said that every expert who came to Guangzhou to give a speech came to the lecture in person, and she used all kinds of secret recipes of experts. She bought all the popular educational books on the market and went home to read them with her daughter.
Moreover, in order to let her daughter receive the best education and not lose at the starting line, she chose the special place of Guangzhou Children's Palace, where she bought a house with the most expensive and worst layout, with only one purpose, that is, she hoped her daughter would receive the best education from an early age and not lose at the starting line. However, when her daughter entered middle school, she found that her daughter had let her down.
From the age of three, my daughter was sent to the Children's Palace to study painting, English, music, dance and almost all popular early education courses. But why did her daughter get poor grades in all subjects in junior high school, which made her particularly disappointed? She doesn't understand. She felt wronged. She said: I have worked so hard, why didn't my children grow up as I hoped?
Such confusion and pain can be seen everywhere, whether in the media or in daily life. Mothers like this can be seen everywhere, and parents pay the most time and money. Why didn't the children grow up as their parents expected?
Obviously, they don't know their children, and they haven't carefully observed the characteristics of children's autonomous learning in early childhood. So after primary school, I was nervous and nervous when I met a little problem. so this is it？ Don't let the children lose at the starting line? Is this slogan for parents? Sequela? .
Many of our parents are afraid? Lose? Therefore, I am particularly nervous. Because of nervousness, the strings of the brain are stretched all day, and the focus of thinking and eyes are constantly on the child, constantly looking for various possible reasons in the child? Lose? Weaknesses and shortcomings. It is precisely because of fear and high tension that our judgment and thinking nerves are prone to deviation or even blindness, which casts a shadow over our educational wisdom and makes family education fall into blind areas or even dark areas.
Because of panic, fear of losing at the starting line, so nervous, highly sensitive, there will be shadows and blind spots in my heart, just like the fear of not knowing the direction after the power failure at home.
Why does darkness make us afraid? Because we can't see ourselves clearly and others clearly in the dark. I don't know where I am or what will happen. Then, there is some movement around, and we all panic. Any shadow that passes in the dark will make us fidget. This is the fear brought by darkness, and this is a series of consequences brought by panic.
? Don't let the children lose at the starting line? These short ten words have kept our family education in the shadow of fear and anxiety. Because I am afraid that my child will fail in the exam, because I am afraid that I will fail in every exam, I keep nagging my child and obsess over his shortcomings. We believe that children's problems can change the result as long as they are said every day. The child is tired of listening, tired of listening, and scared. They not only closed their ears, but also closed the door.
As a result, the wisdom lamp of family education went out, and parents and children fell into panic, tension and fear. As a result, fear makes our blood vessels contract, and the blood supply to our brain and heart is insufficient, causing our mental pain and physical and mental fatigue; It has caused the dilemma that children and parents have not yet started to act, and their spirits and emotions have been lost.
Example 2 of parents' failure in educating their children
2. One? Stupid? Words make children lose confidence and motivation.
In family education, there is a word that our parents often talk about. We want our children to be smart and afraid of being stupid, so we use you from time to time. Stupid? To hurt the child. Why is it easy to say that a child is stupid?
Because we have no patience with children! We don't know that the process of children's memory and language learning needs a lot of information input and repeated input (that is, reading).
After the children went to primary school, they sat in the classroom and listened to the teacher. After listening to the teacher's words for three times, parents think their children are stupid. In fact, the problem is not that children are stupid, but that children are not prepared enough before going to school, and their vocabulary and reading are insufficient. Just like when we learn English, if we only know five words, you can't understand what the teacher is telling you in English class. If you know 500 words, it will be much easier. You can go to middle school if you know 2000 words.
From kindergarten to primary school, as long as children can meet the requirements of the first grade of primary school and face the brand-new learning environment with vocabulary knowledge and various learning abilities accumulated in daily life, they will be calm and happy. And let children study calmly and happily, which requires our patient help and guidance in early childhood.
When children are motivated, recognized and see their progress, they will naturally be excited. When she gets excited, she forgets to eat and sleep, while her parents are always eager for success. If the child fails, she will simply say that the child is rude? Stupid? , in? Stupid? In the shadow of words, children will lose confidence and find no pleasure in learning?
Example 3 of parents' failure in educating their children
3. A virus formula poisoned the mind of a generation.
When it comes to this formula, I'm afraid the children born after 80 have the most say. According to the survey, many post-80s youths' anxiety and fear are related to this formula. What formula is this?
This formula comes from a simple reasoning, which directly infers a person's life from an exam. Many parents often put pressure on their children before and after each exam.
If you don't score 100 this time, you won't get into the top five;
If you don't rank in the top five, you are not a good student;
If you can't be a good student, you won't be admitted to a key middle school;
If you can't get into a key middle school, you can't get into a key high school;
If you can't get into a key high school, you can't get into a key university;
If you can't get into a key university, you won't find a good job in the future;
If you can't find a good job, you can't find a good partner, and there is no happiness without a good life.
This formula has become a cancer of the body of the post-80 s generation, deeply poisoning the hearts of a generation.
Anyone with a little logical common sense and social experience will find that this formula is illogical at all and should be a reasoning with low IQ. An exam cannot be fixed for life, a famous university may not bring good luck, and having a lot of money may not necessarily lead to happiness. Why is such a deduction formula lacking life wisdom so popular? It is because the lamp of wisdom of our Chinese nation has been extinguished on the stage of our family education.
Because we seldom use wisdom to analyze our children, our times and our situation, we often follow the popular and fashionable slogan formulas of the times and are heated up by the mass media. Because conformity makes us feel safe.
As we all know, some time ago, there was a post-80s online group, and they put forward a slogan called? Parents are evil? . This slogan really shocked us. Our Chinese nation has a tradition of virtue and filial piety for five thousand years. Then such a nation, in the 2 1 century, even a group of children will say that their parents are evil! All parents in the world give their love to their children. Why did you come to such a conclusion? I think there must be too many stories behind, too many bitter stories, too many tragic stories, too many stories that hurt two generations together.
The family was originally a warm place. The family was originally the best school for us to study and receive education. The family was originally a place where mom and dad passed on love and wisdom, but our children didn't get it here. What is the conclusion? Parents are evil? ! This shocked us.
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