Teach children how to suffer.
1, parents should have the consciousness of making their children suffer.
For example, when a child learns to walk, don't always help her. Concerned parents can find that children who always practice walking with their parents' help learn to walk for longer than those who practice walking by themselves. Parents should be willing to put their children through these hardships:
1. When your child is five or six years old, ask him to help you move things, sweep the floor and clean the table, tell him how to save electricity and teach them to clean the room.
2. When children go to school, tell them some simple safety knowledge to save money on stationery.
3. Let the children wash the toilet on holidays, knowing that being smelly and dirty is a part of life.
4. Let children do rough work and heavy work properly, knowing that parents need their care.
Children have to pay for living expenses when they go to middle school. With so much money, they can only starve if they overspend.
6. Cultivate children's various life skills, so that they have strong hands-on ability.
7. When a child is about fifteen years old, he should take part in more social activities outside, exercise himself, get in touch with the society and cultivate the spirit of hardship.
Children should stand on their own feet.
Cultivate children's independent will from an early age and reduce dependence on others. That is, the child is responsible for his own affairs.
At home, I finish my daily life independently, cleaning the room and packing things. In learning, I think independently, do independently, and be psychologically independent.
Parents can't think for their children, but let them think for themselves, respect their opinions, let them think independently and have their own opinions, thus laying the foundation for their future success.
3. Parents take the initiative to suffer hardships with their children.
You know, it is impossible for parents who only know pleasure to cultivate a capable person? Suffering? Our children. Therefore, parents can take part in morning running and sports with their children, such as playing ball games, swimming and traveling together, which can increase opportunities for communication with their children and also allow them to get exercise. Being able to bear hardships comes from the accumulation of bit by bit in daily life and from the little things that have not been compromised.
For example: the weather is very cold, children don't plan to go to kindergarten today, parents don't accommodate their children and take them to kindergarten in the cold wind; It's hot in the sky, and it's very tiring to go home at night. Parents and children will take a bath as usual instead of falling asleep. The child and his parents are running, and there are still ten meters to reach the scheduled finish line. The child gasped and didn't want to run any more. Parents encourage their children to run to the finish line together?
This pile, one by one, is training and sharpening children, giving them a strong will and making them suffer. The more you love your child, the more you should strengthen his? Suffering? Education. It is true love and responsibility to let children suffer a little.
4, little by little accumulation, uncompromising.
For example, when children don't want to get up in the cold winter; When it is difficult for children to finish a handmade work; When the child jumps rope to the last exhausted moment; When the child is finishing the housework, friends come to ask him out to play? These are occasions for exercise and hardship.
At this time, children need encouragement, induction and encouragement from parents and family. Ask children to persist in doing what they are doing, and ask children to persist in fighting difficulties. In fact, the spirit of suffering comes from this last courage.
Pay attention to the ways and means of educating children about suffering. Parents need to measure their children's ability to bear hardships in order to teach them to bear hardships; It is necessary to respect the wishes of children, but not to force orders; You need to set an example, not just talk about it.
5, it is necessary to persevere and not be cold.
The long road of life depends on them, and the difficulties have to be solved by them. One day, they will face this society by themselves and take on family responsibilities.
Especially for boys, for a future man, hard work is the foundation of his life. Without the spirit of hard work, he is doomed to face increasingly fierce social competition.
How to Cultivate Children's Hardship Spirit
1, let children participate in labor.
Some surveys show that children who don't participate in labor are not unwilling to work, but some parents don't want their children to participate in labor. Even mopping the floor feels that their children can't clean it. Slightly heavier homework is afraid of children's exhaustion, and spending a little time on it feels that wasting time affects learning, and even more reluctant to let children participate. Many parents do all housework during their children's school days, and only let their children study wholeheartedly. As we all know, the life of people who do housework since childhood is much richer and happier than that of people who don't do housework. But the secret of education is to make children's physical exercise, ideological exercise and ability exercise adjust each other. Only by cultivating children's various abilities can children grow up healthily.
2. Encourage children to participate in public welfare work.
Taking care of children or letting them participate in public welfare work with the group is also a way to cultivate children's work habits. Parents can take their children to participate in public welfare work organized by some communities, such as planting trees in spring, killing mosquitoes and flies in summer, weeding in autumn and sweeping snow in winter. You can also take care of the elderly and the families of martyrs with your children nearby; Let them do what they can for their neighbors, such as distributing newspapers, delivering milk and taking care of children.
3. Make appropriate family rules for children.
As a norm of life and behavior that family members abide by together, family rules are often a silent command and a potentially powerful educational force. Formulating clear, reasonable and feasible family rules is conducive to the healthy growth of children and can restrain, help and educate children to form good behavior habits in the family. Labor is one of the contents of family rules. Family rules should be clear and written clearly. If you have to fold the quilt, clean the room, clean the house, etc. After getting up every day, family rules should also change with the growth of children. Smart parents always let their children do what they can from an early age, take responsibility and perform their duties, so that their children can become more and more mature in the struggle against difficulties.
4. Let children do more things that they can.
Start with the environment and provide practical opportunities. It is necessary to give full play to the favorable conditions of the surrounding environment and cultivate children's excellent quality of hard work. These things include self-help and serving others, such as moving chairs, delivering newspapers, taking out garbage, cleaning tables and chairs, etc.
5. Encourage children to do their own things, even if it is difficult.
Let children do what they like and can do, try not to do everything, and let children do what they don't want to do. We should encourage her when we are in trouble. At least some of us are not very good at this. The child learned to dance before, but later he just felt too bitter and didn't want to dance any more. We gave up without insisting. I think too much now.
6. Usually train children to overcome difficulties with the help of the collective.
To cultivate children's team consciousness, the strength of the team makes it easier for children to overcome difficulties. Successful people in real life are not the best learners, nor the smartest people, but people who can bear hardships and stand hard work and have strong perseverance. Today's children are very smart. Pay attention to other aspects besides children's study, such as the quality of hard work.
7. Problems that should be paid attention to in cultivating children's suffering spirit.
(1) Don't give children too much housework, and don't make them feel tired, otherwise they will lose interest in labor and avoid it;
(2) When praising children, at first, don't give them material and economic rewards. Because children are still young, parents cultivate their children's correct labor concepts, attitudes and habits, rather than letting them gain benefits through labor. If parents reward their children with money, the purpose of children's labor will become the pursuit of material or financial benefits. Once there is no stimulation in this area, the enthusiasm of children will be gone, which parents should pay attention to;
(3) Praise should be sincere and appropriate, and should not be exaggerated. Don't let children form the habit of working for praise, which is contrary to cultivating a correct work attitude.
(4) At school, teachers can also refer to the above methods to cultivate students' habit of loving labor.
The role of educating children to bear hardships
Suffering can temper character. Character is honed. With the progress of society and the great enrichment of material wealth, people's living standards have gradually improved. People's desire for enjoyment has greatly increased.
Most children are only children now. What are the parents of this generation like? Four plus one family? Rotting seedlings. This generation of only children who grew up in superior environment is basically a generation with no worries about food and clothing. They lived a carefree life and grew up under the care of four old people: their families, grandparents and grandparents. They are a generation that grew up in a special environment, lacking the training of hard life, and don't know what life is hard and not easy. Young parents who grew up in special circumstances are willful and self-conscious, and they are self-centered in everything and rarely consider their parents' feelings. Worry-free food and clothing will inevitably lead to a fragile personality, which can't stand the setbacks and blows of life and can't stand a little injustice. The formation of this character, poor self-care ability, it is difficult to take on the heavy responsibility when entering the society. These young parents have become parents before weaning, and it is difficult for them to adapt to their roles, to be financially independent and to fly alone, so it is produced. Moonlight clan? 、? Someone who needs it? Invisibly added new pressure to grandparents born in the fifties and sixties. They finally raised their children, hoping that they could live independently and relax themselves. However, a new generation was born and they had to work endlessly. They really survived to be grandfathers, but in fact, they have become themselves? Grandson? . So a kind of helpless sadness naturally came. Some even sighed and complained about their untimely birth. Destined to be the last generation to honor their parents? Alas!
Numerous facts have proved that all children born in poor families have a strong spirit of self-reliance, are more sensible and are very filial to their parents. Therefore, to cultivate children, it is necessary to start from suffering, suffering their minds and bones, which is fundamental and also the foundation of educating people.
Suffering can forge will. Whether a person's will is strong or not determines the direction of his life. Family education in developed countries generally attaches importance to boys' self-care ability and hard-working spirit. Because the developed market economy requires every member of society to have this ability and spirit.
At a comrade-in-arms party, I heard a general tell a story. At sunset, there was a county magistrate in Hebei who raised five sons. Before he died, he said something intriguing and full of philosophy. The old man said? There are two hardships in life, dilemma, thinness and danger. ? Namely: Coptis chinensis is bitter, and poverty is more bitter; It is difficult to climb the sky, and it is even harder to ask for help; Mountains and lakes are dangerous, and people's hearts are more dangerous; Spring ice is thin and human feelings are thinner; You have to suffer from it, know its difficulties, know its risks and live up to its shortcomings before you can be an official. ? The younger generation followed the ancestral teachings of the family and became today's generals.
It is often said that it is nothing to suffer when people are young, but they are blessed when they are old, without suffering. It makes sense that those who suffer in the first half of their lives will be blessed in the second half.
Suffering can temper blood. Blood is the quality of loyalty and sincerity. Generally speaking, bloody people hate evil, dare to say and do things, dare to do things, and don't bow to evil forces. They will never be two-faced with one thing in front of them and one thing behind them. A bloody person can stand up and lend a helping hand when others are in trouble, and will not be timid only by considering his own gains and losses.
Boys should look like boys. However, the reality is that except for children in rural areas, children in most cities have lost their wildness, and all of them, like adults, have lost their childlike innocence and become more and more masculine and feminine.
A man without blood, masculinity, backbone, sissy and recklessness can't be a man with indomitable spirit. Soldiers are bloodless and afraid of war and death. How do they win the battle and defend their country? By extension, a nation has no spirit, lacks blood, and is weak and incompetent after living alone. It can only be trampled on, weak and bullied, and it will never stand upright, let alone stand in the forest of nations.
I recently read the book "The Length of an Army". The 32 founding commanders are all bloody men. They are extremely loyal to the party and have firm ideals and beliefs. They are all indomitable people. They took part in the revolution when the country was in danger. They never want to have fun, and no one is afraid of death on the battlefield. For example, Wang Jinshan, the first commander of the People's Liberation Army 12 Army, is the prototype of the TV series "Bright Sword" Li Yunlong. Born in a poor family in Hong 'an, Hubei Province, he began to work as a herdsman in a large family at the age of 9. At the age of 65,438+05, he joined the Red Army and began to fight hard. /kloc-became a company commander at the age of 0/6, followed Xu's banner, and became a young teacher of the Red Army at the age of 20. Then, he became a member of Liu Deng's army. On the battlefield, people become crazy. Marshal Liu Bocheng said this about Wang Jinshan? That's not madness, that's revolutionary heroism. ?
It is suggested that parents should inherit the fine tradition of our Chinese nation, borrow wisdom from the ancients and learn from their ancestors, and consciously let their children suffer hardships, see the world through the storm, and increase their knowledge and talents. Let them go and let them walk into the world independently! Be an eagle in the storm, not a bird under the eaves, encourage them to conform to the natural laws of life, consciously do what they should do at all stages of life, give full play to their strengths, avoid shortcomings, find the right angle, seize opportunities, develop themselves, and strive to open up a new world of their own.
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