A letter to my lost son Dear son:
The greatest pain in life is regret. The road of life can't turn back, only move forward. This is also the place that worries my mother most. The second day, the most critical moment in life, is the age when I began to have my own understanding of life, life and feelings, but it is also the time when life is the easiest to take a fork in the road.
Mother hopes to be with her son during this time, whether confused or ignorant. Mom doesn't want to interfere too much, but she must also be able to participate, just because I am a mother, and I have no regrets about loving your mother all my life!
Do you know that?/You know what? For the main task at this stage, for the first time you may be ignorant of lame feelings, son, learning is the starting point of life. If you can't master more and better knowledge, you will be like a bird with broken wings. However, it is hard to fly too high after all. There is no choice but to accept it. Only when a man is strong can he be respected and favored by others. Like a towering tree, he can attract birds to build nests, but he can't succeed.
For learning, scientific methods always come first, son. If you really work hard at school, listen carefully and finish your homework on time, then mom congratulates you. This is a sign of maturity and growth. Son, if you really do it, then stick to being yourself. If not, please get lost in time!
Actually, what worries your mother more is your emotional world. Recently, you are always addicted to texting and chatting. Mother knows that her son must have his own secrets. Everyone came from that era, and your mother can feel every change.
However, my mother still wants to tell you that feelings are beautiful, but there is also an extremely cruel side. It can make your heart ripple, but it will also make the people you lost miserable. Son, you are too young to bear too many things. Love is only a temporary feeling and will change with time and mood. If one day you really grow up and mature, you will understand that even the person you love most may leave you.
What's more, now you don't even know what you like best. What you're looking for is just a feeling. Others have feelings that I also want. Such feelings have no meaning. It is better to settle your heart and accept the washing and baptism of time. Maybe you will inadvertently get your true love!
Please remember one thing: don't expect the beauty of your feelings too much, and don't exaggerate the pain of losing. Mom really doesn't want to see you get hurt!
Son, I won't ask you to support me for a lifetime, but I won't support you for a lifetime. When you reach the age of 18, your mother's responsibilities will be fulfilled. Whether you take the bus or drive a Mercedes, whether you eat shark's fin or steamed bread, you can only take care of yourself!
You must learn to be responsible for yourself, there is no free lunch!
A heartbroken mother
XXXX。 X. X
A letter to my missing son. Second son:
Your grandfather called to tell me that your mother was ill, and you refused to see her.
As a father, on such a regrettable day today, I can't help but write a letter to you seriously and have a serious talk with you, because you are full of rebellious psychology and refuse to answer my phone. And all this is because your mother is ill and you don't want to see her. Maybe in your eyes, my father is not qualified to preach to you. But I know that no matter what the parents' fault is, when he is sick, consciously dying and wants to see you, your refusal is wrong! It is more likely that you will never make up for it!
I don't think it's your fault that this situation has come to this day, but you should learn to understand and accept it, because life is colorful and full of misfortune and darkness. There is no absolute right or wrong!
There are many things in life that you can choose freely, such as how to live, how to think, and even how to die, but there are also many things that you have no right to choose. You have no right to choose the way to come into this world, and you have no right to choose who to be your parents.
I know you are in adolescence now, and your heart is full of rebellious ideas and concepts. I know exactly how you feel at this moment, because it seems that it happened to me yesterday.
But I think you can think now, so it is necessary for me to tell you the story of the breakdown of our family relationship, that is, to tell you the history of our family.
I don't want to change anything about you, but I hope that after you know this, you should have a deeper thinking about life. Although it is cruel to you, you should know all this, because this is your destiny! For us, survival is a battle. If we can't understand clearly, we can't face the future correctly, so when most children are still under the control of their parents, you have to accept it and face it seriously!
Your mother and I met in the training of a literary youth salon in a local newspaper. As a young man who loves literature, I have a deeper understanding of literature here! ,
When I met your mother, for me, your mother's eyes attracted me like bright sunshine, and we were immersed in love like all young men and women who fell in love at first sight.
At that time, I was depressed in the confusion of reality, and no one told me where to go in life! And no one can give me the necessary guidance for a successful life. So love came, and I drifted to a desert island like a drowning man, and love showed me its beautiful side. So, at that time, love was everything to me, the whole meaning of my existence, and I lived for love!
At that time, your mother was in poor health and had no job. All the elders thought that I should not fall in love with your mother, but all this did not stop our emotional development. One day, after your mother and your grandmother had a conflict, your mother raised the topic of marriage. At that time, I was under the legal age of marriage, and I didn't have a deep understanding and psychological preparation for marriage. But I thought at that time: if you love someone, you must be responsible for her, and marriage may be the destination of love. So we decided to get married, and we chose to travel to get married.
In this way, on a rainy autumn morning, without the excitement of the wedding reception, the romance of the wedding dress with flowers and too many blessings, we embarked on the wedding journey with the long whistle of the train.
Someone said:? Marriage is the grave of love? . But I have always believed that marriage is not the grave of love, it should be another starting point of love. But unfortunately for me, marriage is a failure!
When your mother and I really got married and lived together, we found that people with different personalities had so many contradictions. I am a born male chauvinist, and your mother is naive, which doomed us to love and get married, but we can't spend our lives together.
Life after marriage is bitter and poor. We rented a bungalow for 30 yuan. We have eaten a lot of black noodles with a lot of bran that you have never seen before. This kind of noodles tastes worse than corn flour! It's hard to excrete after eating it! But if there are only two of us in the world, I think: even in such days, we will stay together until we are old.
However, life is not just the life of two people, and life is not just love! Men have parents, brothers, friends and careers to prove, which men can't give up. Your mother's innocence is so retarded in front of all kinds of social relations. I live in a man's pain.
Because your mother can't handle the relationship with her family correctly, our life has been quarreling and suffering. Young me, I have a macho heart. At that time, I was angular and could not handle family conflicts skillfully. Finally, after your mother hurt my mother childish, I hit her!
She can't accept this reality. She took all the pills at home that she thought might be fatal, but she didn't know she was pregnant with you. When she learned that she was going to be a mother, she was pregnant for nearly five months, and the doctor's advice was abortion. If your mother had miscarried at that time, there would be no you in this world, and of course there would be no pain like you today. But your mother is in poor health. If you had miscarried, your mother might have collapsed. So, I made a decision: let your mother give birth to this child, and if there is any problem with this child, let me bear it!
When I gave birth to you, there was no one around me, just me and your mother. Your mother has always been a very clean and diligent woman. She always keeps her house tidy and orderly! Before admission, she was responsible for all the bedding and washing at home.
At that time, it was very cold. In the process of giving birth to you, I got rhinitis because of my cold neglect, and rhinitis accompanied and tortured me for nearly ten years. Your date of birth is 199 1 year 1 month 19, and the specific time is 15: 3 pm. It was a cold solar term and a very cold day of the year.
When your mother was pregnant with you, I dreamed it was a boy. I originally named you? Meng Nan? Yes, and according to the solar terms when you were born, what do you think it is called? Whistling cold? Not bad! After you were born, when you registered your household registration, you were considered to be the eldest grandson of Gaos thought, so you should respect grandpa's opinion in naming. When asking for your grandfather's advice, your grandfather named you Xinsheng, and your grandfather's hope and painstaking efforts in this name are self-evident.
After you were born, your mother's attitude and views on our family have not changed, and grandparents are very sad! I was only 25 years old at this time, and my heart was full of male chauvinism. Although I am an ordinary worker, my heart is full of the desire to make contributions. Being young makes me full of dreams of success in the uncertain future. I don't think I can let my parents divorce your mother because they are not satisfied with my daughter-in-law.
I know divorce hurts your mother a lot, because we once said we would never break up, but we broke up anyway. That day was1June 30th, 992, and you were 18 months. I am 24 years old. My heart was broken when I left the home we shared with your mother with you. It was a sunny summer day, but standing under the summer sky with you, my heart was as cold as a cold winter!
Looking back, your mother and I both burst into tears. At that time, I vaguely felt that something had left us forever.
After divorcing your mother, you have been living in your grandparents' house, while your father is wandering around with young dreams and seeking success. Up to now, I still haven't succeeded, and I haven't done my duty to you! This is my failure and my regret. I know I can't make up for the lost time, but I still hope you can face it correctly. To face our imperfect present situation and life.
Divorce is the biggest failure of both men and women, especially ordinary people. After your mother and I divorced, she lost her job in kindergarten because she was found to be infected with hepatitis B virus by physical examination, and later she lost her job because she was not good at getting along with her colleagues, and finally she was laid off. The pain in her heart is enormous!
Your mother finally lost her religion and became a nun in the church, hoping to feel the glory of heaven in the prayer of praising God! But there is no pure land in this world where those lost lambs can be placed. Churches and monasteries are also full of worldly hypocrisy and greed, and your mother's innocent personality is unacceptable to God. According to your grandfather, after she left the church, she lived in hunger and cold for quite some time.
Maybe you will remember that she gave you some poor money when she came to see you, and you refused her money, you know? Your refusal broke the heart of a poor and lonely mother. You still refuse her today. Do you know how cruel this is! And this cruelty may make you regret it later!
Maybe your grandparents misled you, and their ideas affected your understanding of your mother, but your grandparents are not wrong! Their education does not enable them to have a higher understanding of this turbulent society and life. They raised you for mom and dad, and they have done a good job!
Although I haven't had direct contact with your mother for more than ten years, I know that your mother cares about you very much, and you are still the treasure in her heart! She once sang a lullaby for you and stayed up all night for your illness. Although I don't know how she misses you in those lonely days, I know that as a mother, she misses you. Your grandfather told me that she was ill. When she was ill, she lost confidence in life and felt that she was dying. At this time, the person she wants to see most is you. I thought: Maybe your concern and acceptance can give her confidence to live. If you hurt her like this and let her leave this world because of losing confidence, I think it will never be a loss for you.
Your mother is not a great woman. She has an immature side, simple and naive, but not a bad person. Sometimes we can give help and care to strangers, but why not give it to our mother? And she didn't ask you anything, just want you to accept her and look at you!
I don't think there is anything wrong with her bringing you into this world. Without her, there would be no you!
At this time, your refusal can make her lose the confidence to live!
You can hate our parents because divorce didn't bring you a good childhood and upbringing. You can hate your incompetent father, but you have no right to refuse your mother.
You know, when you ignore your mother and refuse your mother, who else in this world will believe you and recognize you!
You are unfortunate! But you can't fall.
Think about it! Go and see your mother. To her, you are the gospel from heaven! If there is any good medicine in the world that can cure her illness, it is you. Go and see her! This is an unqualified father's plea to people.
XXX
XXXX。 X. X
Letter to the missing son: the third son:
The day before yesterday, your father sent me a text message and suddenly offered to take you back. I remember it was a month ago. It seems that you have a bad temper and your grandparents are angry. At that time, my mother always felt that she was a drag on them, and you were a drag on their lives, which was natural trouble, so my mother let your father take you away in a rage. Your father didn't reply to your mother at that time. Your father never gave a simple answer to the question whether you want me or not. From this point of view, your mother looks down on him, not a man!
Grandpa is in poor health again recently. He has a younger brother at home and three or four busy adults who need their help to take care of their meals. Hey, I'm over seventy. Mom really can't bear to part. In fact, you also like being at grandpa's house. Grandpa loves you the most after mom, so grandpa is here and mom is at ease. This summer vacation, you stayed with grandpa for many days, and your feelings with them deepened. After all, the two old people are so lonely when they are old. You are old and can even give them a lot of spiritual comfort, so when your father discussed with them, the answer was yes. But dad doesn't live at home anymore. You said you thought he had a new mother. So mom doesn't feel at ease. If anything happens to grandpa, who can take care of you? Dad may not give you to mom then. If you are by your mother's side, your mother will definitely give up the man who doesn't accept you, so at this point, your mother is very uneasy about giving it to your father, even though you are suitable for you anywhere.