Personally, I think it is very important for parents to control the direction of education and set good rules for their children when educating them. Let me talk about it from the following aspects.

Today, the first thing I want to discuss with you is how to cultivate children's self-confidence.

Story 1: First of all, it is very important to cultivate children's self-confidence.

I don't want to talk about the role of confidence here, I just want to tell a true story:

It was an afternoon more than 30 years ago: a 9-year-old girl was writing on her windowsill, one was a "sheep" and the other was a "bridge". For most people, these two words are definitely not the most difficult. But that little girl just can't write those two words: at first, her eldest sister taught her to write, but she couldn't; Then the second sister teaches, but still doesn't teach; Finally, the third sister taught me, but I still can't write.

So the four of them were scolded and cried by their father, and the four of them cried into a ball. Later, I transferred to my father to teach, and the result was still the same-I couldn't write. The little girl was at a loss and wrote the words "bridge" and "sheep" all afternoon.

The little girl cried, crying very sadly: "how can I be so stupid?" No one in the world is more stupid than me. Why am I so stupid? I hate myself! " "

This is true at home and at school. Her teacher wants to stay in school, that is, to let the students who have not mastered the new words keep writing, so she and another daughter whose mother is mute are kept in class by the teacher every day. Later, even the teacher was embarrassed: "Well, when will you two begin to understand?" I really can't bear to leave you here, but how can you not learn? "

Now you should know who that little girl is, right? She, that stupid little girl is me, me.

But for many years, I have been thinking: how could I be so stupid in the first place?

Until one day many years later, when I stood on the podium and explained "the power of self-confidence" to the students, I suddenly had an epiphany, and the problem that had been bothering me for many years suddenly became clear: it was because of inferiority complex, but because of lack of self-confidence.

The thing is this: at that time, my grandmother shaved my head for various reasons. I was 9 years old, you know. I am a sensible little girl, but I am a bald girl.

What's more, my deskmate is a tall and big repeat student who knows everything. I am detained by my teacher every day, and he calls me a "little nun" every day.

So, at that time, I was particularly afraid of reading, of my classmates' strange eyes, and of my classmates calling me a "little nun". So I was tired of learning, I played truant, and my sisters sent me into the classroom. I chased after her and shouted, "Sister, I don't want to learn, sister, I want to go home with you!" " "

In this way, I certainly have no desire to learn. Of course, I can only be the dumbest student in my class.

But in the second semester, things changed. Why? Because my hair is long, no one dares to laugh at me anymore, and no one dares to call me "little nun". I don't have to feel inferior, and I won't feel inferior again.

I finally have hair like other students, instead of coming to class with a big bald head every day. In the second semester, I got a Xinhua dictionary because of my rapid progress, which was the first prize in my life. Before that, I felt that I was the stupidest person in the world, and I couldn't imagine that I would go on stage to receive the award.

Flowers and applause have been with me ever since. ...

Therefore, self-confidence is very important, especially for a minor. It can make or break a person. For example, my inferiority is not because of my hair, but because of other things that cannot be changed? Then my life may have to be rewritten.

It should be said that I was unlucky once, but I was also lucky. It can be said that few people can encounter such a bizarre event as mine, but it also deeply inspired me: how important self-confidence is to a person.

Therefore, when I was lucky enough to be a people's teacher many years later, I always encouraged my students, gave them confidence and hope, and told them again and again that "teachers believe in your strength and believe in yourself" because I don't want to see myself again.

Therefore, a person can have nothing, but never lose heart! Everyone in the world can distrust you and look down on you, but only you have to believe in yourself forever! You are the best, you can do it!

02

Secondly, we should cultivate children's concentration.

I wonder if parents have noticed that all dedicated children are particularly efficient. It is also mentioned in various books or documents that concentration is the first element of a person's success. Because the people concerned have clear goals, clear priorities, will not be emotional, will not be disturbed by things unrelated to the task, when completing a task, they have no distractions, highly concentrated attention and go all out. Therefore, they minimize internal energy consumption and maximize the effective use of time.

For example, we don't bother, interfere or even play games when children do anything. In our family, children can play games, even on the eve of the senior high school entrance examination and even on the day of the senior high school entrance examination, they can play games for an hour every day. Because that hour in the evening is my exercise time and my children's play time.

To this end, my husband protested to me countless times: how can children play games? How do children surf the Internet? I asked: there was no one at home at that time, and the computer was on. Why can't children play games? If he doesn't play at home, can you guarantee that he doesn't play games outside?

As a result of several arguments, my judgment is correct: as long as time is well controlled, even playing games will not hinder children's study. For children, it is relaxation, an opportunity to exercise their hands and brains, not just games.

Of course, this premise is that there is monitoring and a time limit. When I get home after running for an hour, the children must leave the computer unconditionally, otherwise the game time will be cancelled the next day or even the third day.

Facts have proved that my method can't be wrong. Children play games for at least one hour every day from the first grade of primary school, which not only does not affect their grades, but in the junior high school entrance examination, he entered junior high school with the first place in the school district (more than 20 thousand population); Three years later, in the senior high school entrance examination, he entered the walk class of County No.1 Middle School with the first place in the whole region (population around 50,000).

The child's teacher also reported that our child is one of his rare dedicated children for so many years: he sits upright in class, and even if the class is in a mess, he concentrates on doing homework or reading books, completely unaffected by other students.

Because I have instilled in my children the concept of "we don't interfere with each other and do our own things"-you do your homework and I do my own thing, or prepare lessons or surf the Internet. You can ask me questions, but you must wait for me to come to an end; I have something to ask you. I must wait for you to finish your homework. No one can interfere in the middle time, otherwise the consequences will be at your own risk. Unlike many parents who send water and fruits.

To put it bluntly, this is not caring, not caring, but simply and rudely interrupting: how can children be efficient if you interrupt their thoughts again and again? Where did you get the attention?

Therefore, since children are a little sensible, we have not interfered with each other in this way. We thought it was easy, and later we learned that I had invisibly cultivated the child's attention-no influence, no interference, no interruption.

Because I don't like being disturbed during working hours, and I don't like being interrupted.

Silkworm babies raised by children

03

Actually, this is the second topic we are going to talk about tonight, which is to set rules for children, because "no rules can't make Fiona Fang".

The rules are made by parents, but the completion depends on the efforts of children and parents.

Still the same topic just now, playing games.

The game is not impossible to play, but there must be preconditions, such as one hour a day or several hours a week. In our family, it is one hour a day, too much, no; Of course, I won't lose this time, unless there is no internet at that time.

Some parents will say that an hour is an hour. Can you do it? I want to say that as long as you have firm confidence and enough self-confidence, you can do it.

Our children can certainly do it, because habit becomes nature. As long as he hears my footsteps entering the door, he will stand up and quit the game page.

At the end of last year, a student said that our family played computer. I promised my parents for various reasons before.

The appointment is for 2 hours, but the students want to cheat and use brute force to delay the time like at home. But he forgot that this is our home, and I am the one who makes the rules.

After more than an hour, the first thing I did when I came in was to tell the student that 10 minutes later, he had to turn off the computer and go home for dinner, or he would never come to our house to surf the Internet again. A man must keep his word, and the students didn't say anything at that time.

I wash and cut vegetables. On the way, I told my students that it was the countdown stage. If I put the vegetables in the pot and he doesn't turn off the power, I'll cut off the power directly.

When I put the vegetables in the pot, covered the lid and probed again, the students had obediently turned off their computers and closed their notebooks.

While tidying up his computer, he said wryly, "Teacher, I'm not that stupid. If you cut off the power supply, my previous games will be played in vain, and it will be useless to pass the exam. "

I don't care what level or practice you are. For me, the time is up and I must keep my promise.

In the words of students, the consequences of being forcibly cut off are very serious, but he asked for it and has nothing to do with me. I have given him enough time.

To this end, my parents especially worship me and say that I have ideas. Because in their family, children never listen, and this time is always extended indefinitely and then extended.

In fact, it's not that I have a way, but that I have given my child enough expectations: give him a vaccination first, then count down, and finally, even if I cut off the power forcibly, he has nothing to say, right? He is the one who doesn't obey the rules, not me who is unreasonable.

04

Finally, I want to say that if you can DIY all kinds of food with your children as much as possible.

It is said that companionship is the longest confession, and it is also true in the process of communicating with children. Let children participate in it, this is the best company, this is the greatest pleasure. It not only brought the parent-child relationship closer, but also let the children know that food is hard to come by.

Not to brag, since our children's fifth grade, our mother and son have tried more than 20 kinds of delicious food in DIY, such as cake, bread, pizza, egg tart, sushi, ice cream, jelly, noodles and so on. We have tasted almost all the delicious food you can name.

If nothing else, just to enjoy, just to let children feel the sense of accomplishment of becoming a member of the family. Because in the eyes of many parents, the child is a kid who knows nothing. Everything will be fine as long as they get good grades.

In fact, how can children have a sense of responsibility without practice and personal experience? How do you know it is not easy to pay? Know the hard work of parents?

It is through repeated efforts that children understand that the same seemingly ordinary food needs constant trial, practice and improvement before it can finally succeed. Is it the same with learning and being a man?

After three years of primary school, the children's weekly diary is very bad. There are more than 100 words in a weekly diary, of which only 68 words are used for the word "at that time". You can imagine how bad it is.

For this reason, the child was upset. After reading Zhou Ji, I smiled. Really, there was no accusation or irony. I just laughed-laughing at the simplicity of the child, laughing at the child would not express it.

Diary of the second week, I just took my child to a colleague's house for a drink. Afterwards, I asked him, "Were you happy yesterday? What did you eat? Which dish do you think is the best? "

As a result, the child's weekly diary got the first "excellent" in history.

The third time, I asked my child to peel peanuts and let him write the whole process. As a result, Zhou remembered "excellent+star", the best result in the class.

Since then, I have asked my children to write about the process of helping me with housework almost every week.

The child said unconvinced, "mom, you are so smart." You always ask me to do things for you, and you also say that this is to help me write my weekly diary. " I smiled. "Isn't that great? Help my mother do housework and write the weekly diary of' excellent+star', killing two birds with one stone. "

Through food DIY and housework again and again, I let the children know that Marx is telling the truth-"Labor creates man himself." Only by letting children really participate in labor can children write their own true feelings and truly satisfactory compositions.

Educating children is a systematic project, which requires our parents' continuous study and efforts. In China, parents are the only occupations that can be employed without training and study.

In fact, parents really need not only professional knowledge, but also love and patience. What is needed most is the heart!

Did you educate your children with your heart?

My child and I made bacon ourselves.