With the development of society, our parents' educational methods are no longer suitable for children's psychology. When we were young, we listened to our parents. Moreover, influenced by traditional education methods, parents will also ask their children to obey their own words absolutely, and they can't doubt or express different opinions.
However, now is a civilized society, and parents and children are equal in personality and other aspects. Therefore, parents only need to care for their children and have the obligation to educate them, so they can no longer force their children to obey themselves.
In modern society, if parents want their children to be obedient, they should treat them equally, educate them democratically, respect their children's personality, acknowledge their positive position in the family, and convince others by reasoning. Only in this way can children listen to their parents. Parents can start with the following five details:
First, educate children to pay attention to time and occasion.
Parents should choose the right time to educate their children, preferably when there is plenty of time and both sides are in a good mood. Because at this time, parents will not be too impatient and can reason with their children calmly; And children are more likely to be educated by their parents because they are in a good mood.
Parents should not only pay attention to time, but also pay attention to the occasion of educating their children. Although children are young, they also have self-esteem. Therefore, parents should not criticize their children in public, nor in front of relatives and friends, let alone teach them lessons in front of friends.
If parents should educate their children, then children will feel humiliated. In order to save face, he is likely to choose a way to contradict his parents.
Second, educate children to be emotional and rational.
If parents want to convince their children, they should take care of and respect their children as the starting point, and be emotional and rational with their children. Only in this way can children listen to their parents.
For example, parents think that their children spend a lot of money and want to teach them to be frugal. Therefore, in addition to not doting on children and buying them whatever they want, parents should also take time to discuss with their children how to spend reasonably.
Parents can use examples to put facts and reason, so that children can understand what is generous, what is stingy, what is moderate consumption, and what is true chic. Only when parents and children have heart-to-heart communication will children be willing to listen to their parents.
If the child is angry or emotionally unstable, then parents should wait for the child to calm down before educating him, otherwise the child will not listen to the parents.
Third, educate children to have patience and perseverance.
Children's behavior habits are not formed overnight. Therefore, parents should not be impatient when educating their children, but must have great patience and perseverance.
When educating their children, parents should pay attention to their own voice intonation, try to communicate with their children in a gentle and low voice, eliminate the pressure on children, narrow the psychological distance between children, let children feel their parents' understanding and respect, and reduce their rebellious psychology.
In the process of persuading children, parents should not ask them to respond immediately or make up their minds to correct them, but should give them some time to think, so as to promote their self-education ability.
Fourth, parents should pay attention to the skills of educating their children.
When some parents educate their children, they will feel that their language is poor and they have no ability, so the effect is very poor. If so, parents should try to improve their language skills.
When educating their children, parents should not only be gentle and sincere, but also use some skills, puns, alternative sentences and a discussion tone. For example, you can say to your child, "Isn't this good?" , "Is this ok?" "I believe you can do it!" Wait a minute. In addition, parents want to persuade their children to pay attention to the following three points:
1, don't nag the child.
Many parents, especially mothers, like to nag when educating their children. One thing is always said over and over again, and it is easy for children to get bored, which in turn leads to rebellious psychology.
2. Don't order children.
Some dads like to direct their children when educating them. The language is simple and blunt, non-negotiable and impersonal. In this way, even if children obey orders, they are not convinced and are prone to rebellious psychology.
3. Don't be sarcastic about children.
Some parents will satirize their children when educating them, which will not only hurt them, but also affect their behavior. Gradually, children will become mean and like to dig at others, thus affecting interpersonal relationships.
If parents find it difficult to control themselves by face-to-face communication with their children, they can write down their thoughts and opinions to their children by writing letters and leaving messages, which may have unexpected effects.
Parents should educate their children from their thinking characteristics.
It is not easy for parents to make their children understand the truth, because the truth is often profound and the child's understanding ability is poor.
Therefore, when parents reason with their children, they should start from the children's thinking characteristics, use easy-to-understand language, give specific examples, and compare the truth vividly.
For example, children like picky eaters, but partial eclipse will make children lack nutrition, make his body resistance worse, and get sick easily. Parents want to change their child's bad habit and tell him this truth directly, which may not be very effective.
Therefore, parents can persuade according to their children's characteristics and psychology. For example, Kaka really wants to grow taller quickly, so when I was a child, I would ask him to correct his bad habit of picky eaters according to his ideas. So I will say to him, "You should eat some of everything, so that your nutrition will be comprehensive and you will grow taller." In this way, he can not only understand, but also be willing to accept.
Dear friends, do you think what Kaka's mother said is reasonable? Do you think children are disobedient and difficult to discipline? Welcome to communicate in the comment area.