Between the vernal equinox and the summer solstice, the days begin to get longer and it gets dark slowly. But once the night covered with the sky is opened, it is as rich and deep as ink, and even the penetration of starlight is very weak. The moon hangs on the edge of the sky, swaying with the wind and shedding lonely light. Unique silver is far less bright than pale street lamps. And I, under the guidance of this slightly bright darkness, decided to go back to the past time against the torrent of time. Go back to the unforgettable years before the most important turning point in my life. "Black Senior Three" is not just a name. But what makes people suffocate is not their studies, but the pressure of competition. In the face of the most important battle in my life, many people around me showed the essence that surprised me. The suspicion, resentment and despair that once flowed silently in the blood were released. Today we are brothers, but tomorrow we can become strangers for one point. The college entrance examination showed me the cruelty of human nature. The university dream is within reach, shining with the light of temptation. No matter how simple the heart is, it will become stubborn and even crazy because of this desire. Look at the top floor of the teaching building, the classroom of Grade Three, which is called "the closest place to heaven". University, paradise on earth? Everyone is too eager for its innovation and independence, its freedom and freedom, so everyone wants to be liberated from depression or sadness. It is in this eager expectation that we strive to gain strength. Learning has become a habit, just learning for the sake of learning, just paving the way for success mechanically. Lose yourself, lose your mind, and even forget that "heaven" is actually just a gorgeous cemetery. Senior three, facing the "rite of passage", ended my youth and frivolous. Sing a sad hymn for my past lush years, and pay homage to all the youthful faces, including injured friendship and pure love. Record a necessary journey with your heart,/kloc-no one aged 0/8 can escape. In the third year of high school, learn to deceive your companions with lies, and malice is more than kindness. The wind blowing from the adult world taught me to sacrifice the trust of others for my own benefit and silently comforted myself: "Every man for himself, the devil takes the hindmost." Trying to find a high-sounding reason for selfishness. Senior three makes me become hypocritical unconsciously, and I don't want to see others shine. When the friendship left, I suddenly found that my heart pain was greater than my joy, but my calmness was greater than my loss. In the face of injured friendship, I can only be silent. Although it torments the soul all the time like the pain of a broken arm, although it is questioned and accused, it has become a panacea for pain relief. Patience may be the only advantage I have learned from it. This is the only bloody reward I have paid a huge price for. And love has become a scar in my heart, occasionally breeding some feelings without delay. Love in senior three is like rock sugar in bitter Chinese medicine. Although a little sweet, it can't change the bitter fact. No vows of eternal love, no fireworks and roses, only bitterness. I can't tell whether I met the right person at the wrong time or the passerby I shouldn't have met. But everything is predestined, and it's over. So I can only accept it. Senior three has also achieved some heroic depravity. Under that kind of heavy pressure, in that kind of ubiquitous competition, there are always some fragile and simple children who become victims of the college entrance examination. Their unyielding souls, they are afraid of being assimilated and transformed. So they made different choices. I would rather whistle in the wind and turn it into an unbeaten bright red rose with the most comfortable flight in my life; I would rather sleep at home, with peach blossoms on my face, and pursue that distant and beautiful fairy tale. I also refused to go through the war before the college entrance examination, and refused to write complicated papers with paper and pen. They are unlucky, so they are unlucky. They use their own choices to keep their true selves, which makes people feel distressed. Their lives, like fireworks in the sky, declined at the peak, showing amazing beauty of determination and becoming legends handed down by students. I remember them quietly in my heart, but I don't know whether that throb is sympathy or helplessness. Now, senior three has passed. This noisy farce is over. I still don't know what role I'm playing. Is it a smiling devil or a crying clown? That's all. It doesn't matter. On such a night, should I relive it with a mandolin or celebrate it with vodka? Capture the details of the past over and over again until you have a blind spot and forget it completely. Such a painful growth is my rare wealth. Maybe one day after many years, I will remember that one night, I wrote down a time of being swayed by considerations of gain and loss, a time of wandering around. Tracing back to the interweaving of sadness and happiness without a source, we are moving towards a new day ... a sea of vicissitudes and a bumpy journey. Where are endless thorns and vines? Where are there no uneven gullies? Where are there no unexpected difficulties and obstacles? Flowers bloom and fall, the tide rises and falls, and I don't know how many past events turn into spring dreams and autumn clouds. If all your hopes ignited by the spark of youth are extinguished by the hurricane, if all your expectations turn into fallen leaves in autumn, then please face the reality and cherish yourself, because you are the one who can help, love and be the most reliable. You can't decide the length of fate, but you can expand its width; You can't control the sky, but you can show a sincere smile; You can't control others, but you can control yourself; You can't predict tomorrow, but you can make use of today; You can't do everything, but you can try your best. People, especially young students on university campuses, can't always let sighs linger in the language of suffering. We must understand that the road in the world is not just a one-way street, and the road always extends to places without footprints. Life should be expanded by yourself. When I first arrived at the university, everything was new and strange at first, and the immediate problems had to be solved by myself. Without the support of parents, on the one hand, I feel it's time to be alone, on the other hand, I'm confused and miss my hometown very much. So I often called home. In the face of these problems, I have to overcome them psychologically first. I want to make a difference in this heart as a gift to go home. I am determined to lay my own sky here, win glory for my hometown and repay the society and my parents. Today, our school gave guidance to freshmen's psychological problems. This is a timely rain. It points out the direction for our new life, and I will sail forward with confidence! In the beautiful campus of Renmin University of China, near the south lake, I spent my freshman year hesitating, yearning for more or less; How disappointed, how depressed. The confusion and frustration of my freshman year gave me a heavy blow. Pain reminded me of the truth of my existence and taught me to think about life. Knowing that the sky is blue, my mind should not always be covered with dust; Knowing that youth is beautiful, my heart sail should not rise and fall in adversity. Life needs us to take solid steps. Don't design yourself in an empty fantasy, let alone deny yourself in a temporary failure. Believe in yourself and the future, just as you believe in every fairy tale. I remember when I was a junior, a senior told me, "Keep yourself busy." Yes! Keep yourself busy and full, and don't do nothing with your parents' money all day. University is the most important period in our life, where we have the most important interpersonal relationship in the future and the knowledge and skills to realize the value of life. University has given us a lot of freedom, and we should use it to develop ourselves, not to make ourselves free. In this colorful and materialistic world, some students are addicted to the internet, and some students have lost their fighting spirit in a comfortable life. Life of youth should not be pale. Xu Zhiwei, a student who lives in Taotao River forever, is an example for us to learn. His spirit should be enlarged and hidden in our hearts, and narrowed and reflected in our usual dribs and drabs. I remember an article published in the school newspaper entitled "Freshmen refuse to be pale". After reading it, I have a deep feeling, not just a freshman, but a lifetime! "Thinking about life" should become a habit of ours. In the era of knowledge explosion and individuality publicity, we should constantly position ourselves, keep our ideals in mind, strengthen our faith, and be a contemporary college student in China with a sense of mission and responsibility. Change it yourself.

I hope I can help you.