Experience from Reading A World Without Complaints will bowen, one of the most famous spiritual teachers in American history, launched a "No Complaints" activity, inviting each participant to wear a special purple bracelet. As soon as they notice their complaints, they will switch the bracelet to the other hand, and so on until the bracelet can be worn on the same hand for 2 1 day. In less than a year, 6 million people from 80 countries around the world enthusiastically participated in this sport, learning to create a better life for themselves and make the world full of positive energy of peace, joy and vitality. And you can also be a part of it, wear a purple bracelet, accept the challenge of 2 1 day, and create a life without regrets for yourself!
This is what I occasionally read in the book A World Without Complaints. I was puzzled when I first saw the title. The world we live in is full of complaints, but we also hate complaints. What is a world without complaints has been far away from us. Complaining is the most exhausting and useless behavior. Sometimes, our complaints not only express our dissatisfaction with people, but also express our dissatisfaction with different life situations. And if we can't find someone to listen to our complaints, we will complain to ourselves in our minds. The magical "complaint-free" movement put forward by the author of "A World without Complaints" comes at the right time, which is exactly what we modern people need most. After reading this book, I think there are only three things in the world: my business, his business and God's business. Those who complain about themselves should try to learn to accept themselves; Those who complain about others should try to turn complaints into requests; Those who complain about God, please try to pray for your wish. In this way, your life will have an unimaginable big change, and your life will be more beautiful and complete.
I never thought about complaining in my previous life, nor did I think about the reasons and process carefully, because complaining has become a natural phenomenon in my life and that of others, and no one never complains. According to Bowen, the reason why we complain is the same as the reason why we do everything: we perceive that complaining will bring benefits. Many complaints involve inducing others, and inducing specific interpersonal communication from others, such as sympathy or recognition. For example, people may complain about their health, but not because they really feel sick, but because the role of' patient' can enable them to gain collateral benefits, such as gaining sympathy from others or avoiding disgusting events. Later, I learned that one of the reasons for complaining about others is to make myself look better through comparison. When I point out your shortcomings, I am implying that I don't have such shortcomings, so I am better than you. That makes perfect sense. Behind complaining is boasting and boasting, but only those who are insecure, question their own importance and are uncertain about their self-worth will brag and complain. We feel that we don't deserve what we want and lack self-affirmation, so we push what we want away by complaining. In our complaint, we also sent a message to the world that we are victims, and by doing so, we will attract more perpetrators for ourselves.
After reading this book, I was deeply touched. When I was slowly immersed in the world of books, I found that it was actually a mirror in my heart. There is no great truth in this, just a very common way, a very common example, telling us a life attitude and letting us know ourselves better. In the mirror, we can see whether our appearance is neat or not, what expression is on our face, anger or joy, and this book is a mirror that reflects our inner world, allowing us to see our inner world, whether it is optimistic or negative. These may not be revealed in our expressions, but there are more or less complaints in our words. Of course, some people think that complaining is a kind of catharsis and a way to adjust emotions. Before reading this book, I thought like this: we commonly call complaining "complaining" and think that occasional complaining helps to adjust our inner balance and get rid of the shadow of our hearts. But after I read this book, I realized that complaining is an epidemic. Your complaining will arouse others' voices and make it an infectious mental illness. Not only can you find a solution, but it can also be solved.
It can make you complain because of the pleasure of complaining, which may eventually lead to uncontrollable results. After the hero's dog was hit by a car, he almost made himself a slave to anger and complaint. It was reason that stopped the hero from complaining and didn't make things worse. Reason is the rational analysis and understanding of his behavior in the inner world, and all this can be done for us without complaining.
In the book, I saw that many people, like me, suddenly found themselves a person with so many complaints and felt a little uneasy, but a sentence in the book made me suddenly wake up: "Be honest with your emotions, be content with your own uneasiness, and don't panic when you find your own shortcomings. Now that it has happened, we should face it honestly and bravely; You should find a way to end it, and you can finally be satisfied with your uneasiness. " The book requires us to have the courage to analyze ourselves, find out our shortcomings and change ourselves. From speaking less and learning to be silent, to being satisfied with not being silent, and then to being satisfied with saying nothing, we can finally really have a "world without complaints." When we don't complain, our mind is only happy. When everyone abandons complaining, the world will be more harmonious.
People must work and develop themselves all their lives. Everyone wants to realize his good wishes and ideals, but it takes a lifetime of struggle to achieve them. However, in real life, each of us will inevitably encounter many setbacks, failures or unsatisfactory things. Whenever this happens, some people can't treat it correctly, causing dissatisfaction and a lot of complaints and complaints. They often complain about heaven, land, fate, colleagues and leaders.
In fact, the biggest victim of complaining is yourself. Some people think they are brilliant, but they can't get promoted. They suspect that the environment is not good and always complain about their work. They don't think it is their responsibility to finish the work on their own initiative, but take complaining and complaining for granted. There are still many people pretending to be arrogant. They often feel that their abilities have not been displayed, that their leaders do not attach importance to themselves, and that their units are unfair to them. As a result, their thinking conflicts seriously, and their intelligence is not used to think about how to do a thing perfectly. On the contrary, they complain all day and waste their good time and energy in negligence. Once a person is bound by complaints and doesn't do his best to deal with his work, it is self-destructive in any unit. No one will be rewarded and promoted because of endless complaints. 10 At least 9 unemployed people complain about the mistakes of their former superiors or colleagues, and few people realize that their unemployment is the result of dereliction of duty.
Through reading, I learned that no matter work or life, I should make a plan for myself and try to do it strictly, which will not only enrich, but also improve efficiency and make things develop in a better and more positive direction. According to the progress of the plan, sum up your gains and losses for a period of time on a regular basis, look at the problem objectively, know your own shortcomings, constantly improve yourself and make follow-up plans.
Whether we are at work or at rest, whether we are serious or lazy, whether we are happy or sad, the passage of time day by day is like flowing into the sea. Although there will be other opportunities, time is gone forever. Only by grasping today can we grasp success. Life is always accompanied by success and failure, and it is always full of joy and sadness. Instead of wasting time complaining, it is better to cherish time, seize the opportunity, think about what you should think and do what you should do. Only in this way can we be happy and successful.
Now, I am also trying to change myself. I won't lose a good mood because I complain again. I will learn to focus on the necessary places and accomplish every task in the plan in a down-to-earth manner.
I believe everything is timely, don't worry about those disturbances, and don't let unhappy things stop my progress. I believe I can steer well and let the ship of life sail to the other side of victory.
We may complain in the hope that complaining will bring some benefits. For example, when we complain to others about the heavy workload, we may subconsciously hope that others will do more or help us share some; We complain about how unlucky we have been recently, perhaps because we hope others can give us some comfort and sympathy. But complaining can't solve any practical problems, and in the end it can only make us fall into a vicious circle of complaining and can't extricate ourselves. Or bring bad influence to our health and life. I don't think anyone wants to live and work with people who complain all day, because even their own lives seem hopeless. If you want to stop complaining, you have to face up to your own difficulties and communicate and solve conflicts in time. It also takes courage. First of all, we should have the courage to admit that we are complaining. Secondly, we should have the courage to resolve contradictions and change the situation instead of complaining blindly.
Everyone's life cannot be smooth sailing. When we encounter something worth complaining about, we may try not to talk, but think rationally first and then take immediate action to change the situation. I think a sentence in the book is right, "Our thoughts create our world, and our words show our thoughts." Many times, perhaps it is the words we complain that have changed our world. We could be relaxed, positive, optimistic and enterprising, but we may become miserable, pessimistic, heavy and inaction because of complaining. The book "A World Without Complaints" has opened a beautiful life for me to eliminate complaints, so change it from now on. Believe in the power of the purple bracelet, believe in your own strength, and you can overcome complaints and create a new world.
Letting go of complaining does not mean inaction in the face of difficulties, nor does it mean giving up the right to speak about social injustice. Complaining with negative emotions is just unconstructive negativity. Gratitude, tolerance and empathy derived from the love of life will not allow anyone to steal or embezzle in any name.
Of course, we also want to change, plus psychological inertia, we don't know how to change. However, it is human nature to change the unsatisfactory status quo. When people realize the negative effects of complaining, the desire for change will naturally rise. When the light of change enters life with emotional resistance, it moves from "conscious incompetence" to "conscious empowerment"
Complaining is the most exhausting and useless behavior. Sometimes, our complaints not only express our dissatisfaction with people, but also express our dissatisfaction with different life situations. And if we can't find someone to listen to our complaints, we will complain to ourselves in our minds. The magical "complaint-free" movement put forward by the author of "A World without Complaints" comes at the right time, which is exactly what we modern people need most. After reading this book, I think there are only three things in the world: my business, his business and God's business. Those who complain about themselves should try to learn to accept themselves; Those who complain about others should try to turn complaints into requests; Those who complain about God, please try to pray for your wish. In this way, your life will have an unimaginable big change, and your life will be more beautiful and complete.
From now on, be a positive person and talk about what you want instead of complaining about what you don't want. In this way, everyone wants to work with you or for you, and you will create higher achievements and gain more gains, far exceeding your dreams. Give it some time and watch carefully, and all this will happen.
Finally, I quote a sentence from Bill Gates: "Life is not equal, so accept it. Remember, never complain. "
I recommend it carefully.