It is difficult for us to have an objective understanding of ourselves. In a sense, it is more difficult to know "self" than to know the objective reality. Su Dongpo said in his poem, "I don't know the true face of Lushan Mountain, but toward which corner of the mountain." From the perspective of social psychology, this psychological phenomenon is called "Su Dongpo effect".

Our self-evaluation of good qualities is often higher than others' estimates, while our self-evaluation of bad qualities is often lower than others' estimates, which means that we are more likely to flatter ourselves. Knowing this, we can understand why we should be modest and prudent and guard against arrogance and rashness. This is actually to overcome our tendency to flatter and beautify ourselves intentionally or unintentionally, so that we can evaluate ourselves more scientifically, objectively and fairly. Of course, modesty is not to belittle yourself at will. "People are self-aware", that is, we should not only see our own shortcomings, but also our own strengths, so as to foster strengths and avoid weaknesses in our study and work and achieve good results. A person's self-evaluation is not naturally formed in a closed self-consciousness, but in contact with all kinds of people around him, pay attention to their attitude towards themselves, imagine their evaluation of themselves, and take this as material, internalize it into their own hearts, and form a self-image as an objective standard. It can be seen that a lot of self-evaluation is also a reflection of the society's evaluation of itself.

There are several manifestations of not knowing yourself correctly:

1. Disdain cognitive type: "What am I like, I still don't understand?" This is the mantra of many people. In fact, many people know little about themselves. What are my strengths and specialties? What are my shortcomings and shortcomings? What is my vision, body, mentality, thinking, reaction, endurance, interpersonal relationship, learning ability and creativity? How many points can you get? Many people don't know. Self-righteous will delay future events.

2. One-sided cognitive type: There are two kinds of people with one-sided cognitive type: one is fully aware of their own advantages, with strong self-confidence, often overestimating themselves and underestimating others, giving people a sense of arrogance. The advantage of this kind of person is a strong sense of superiority and self-confidence, which helps to give play to their strengths and potential and achieve great things. Disadvantages are great chances of success, great chances of failure, serious setbacks and easy separation from the crowd. The other thinks that he has no ability, does not think about making progress, has never played his own advantages all his life, and has lived passively all his life.

3. Random cognitive type: Some people think that "people's life is doomed, and it's useless to think about it", and they don't give play to their own advantages and specialties, and they don't give play to their subjective initiative. They like to let nature take its course and live with it, and don't want to use their brains to muddle along.

Some ways to know yourself correctly:

1. Know yourself as soon as possible: Knowing yourself as soon as possible is the prerequisite for discovering your own advantages and giving play to your role as soon as possible. Throughout history, 10 knows himself and is also a saint; Know yourself at the age of 20 and be a leader; 40 years old, I know myself, I am late; I didn't know myself until I was 60 years old, and I regretted it.

2. Clear the direction as soon as possible: knowing yourself and your strengths and weaknesses is the first step to a good life. According to their own characteristics and advantages, making their own short-term goals and long-term directions is to recognize their roles. When Clinton was young, he was determined to be the president of the United States, and made unremitting efforts for it, and finally achieved his goal. Although not everyone who wants to be president can become president, and everyone who wants to be a boss can have his own career, as long as he works hard, he will certainly gain something.

3. Constantly improve yourself: the world is changing, and people will change with it. Knowing you yesterday may not necessarily know you today. Therefore, it takes a lifetime to know yourself. Similarly, only by constantly improving themselves and adapting to the changes in the world can everyone keep up with the trend of the times and never fall behind. Therefore, if you don't want to change yourself, you always want to change the world, and you will only lose and regret in the end.