Weak, frustrated, lost, so I thought of indulgence and degeneration, but in the end, it seemed so ridiculous. Ironically, a person's waywardness causes the onlookers' sarcastic eyes, which is followed by the absurdity of seeing another normal person.

Today, when I saw the puppet in the window, I thought, when did I become a different person, a little presumptuous, a little proud, a little deep, a little set-minded, a little evil, a little greedy, a little ... a little depressed. I swept the softest corner of my heart and calmly and flatly expressed the views agreed by all moralists, so I seemed to understand that I had lost everything, including myself.

Perhaps, in this world, licentiousness, pride, profundity, malice, evil and greed are allowed, and the only thing that is not allowed is the existence of frustrated people. I don't want to live in a turtle shell. Even if everything is hit hard, I am willing to bear it, solve it, and deal with it in the most understandable way in human nature. I don't want to be selfish to protect myself.

During this time, I have been living in a daze-the troubles of work; I don't understand at home ... I have always been full of hopes and fantasies about life, and I was finally lost by the cruelty and helplessness in life. I think this is life! Maybe it's too long since I was carefree. I often ask my heart what I have lost and what I have gained ... Those simple ideas have changed and become too complicated! Social factors to be considered, society is a big dye vat, no matter how white you look and how well dressed you are! Once you jump into this vat, you will inevitably change color! So it's not my fault. However, after all that has happened, can I understand that this is God's punishment for me? It's not that I'm imagining things, that I can't afford them, that I'm not used to everything that goes wrong. It's true, it's true, there are too many disappointments and feelings. Somewhere inside, I even hear a broken voice. ...

This will not be my life, because I won't allow it. It is said that mentality determines fate. How can we maintain a good attitude? I am an ordinary person, I haven't reached such a high level, and I can't help being disturbed by the outside world, so I will be depressed, annoyed and feel the tragedy of life.

Nowhere to go, this is my greatest sorrow.

I want to believe that tomorrow will be better. ...