In life, being misunderstood is a common thing, which often brings harm to people inadvertently. (Sometimes it may be intentional) Misunderstanding others is based on subjective thoughts, wearing colored glasses and looking at others with suspicion, so the mood is naturally bad, the problems are extreme, and the results of judging things are not true. People who are misunderstood are often like in the clouds and fog. "Two monks are at a loss." It's more sad and unfortunate to bear the unprovoked mental pressure and torture, and feel the man-made trauma and pain, but still don't know what I did wrong and where it was.
Whether at home or in social life, between friends and relatives, between colleagues, between leaders, misunderstandings are like a shadow attached to you. Wherever you go, it will occupy your body and mind, disturb your mind and control your spirit.
Misunderstanding is a game of chess. Whether the players are interested or not, both sides try to figure out the opponent's thinking. If one party is superior and sets two traps, everyone will be annoyed when you are cheated. Misunderstanding is in people's life, intentionally or unintentionally, on various occasions.
Misunderstanding is in people's subconscious, in people's thoughts and in their actions. Misunderstanding is a disease that comes quietly, a silent shell, and a great sorrow for where you will go. It can be seen that misunderstanding has brought great harm to people's feelings.
In the face of misunderstanding, it is far from rare to know each other and cherish each other and miss the old feelings. Today, with the temptation of money, family and even family relations have become subtle under the official position. I think this is the result of interests. The emotional color is not as deep and thick as the ancients, but more simple and clear. People are smarter and smoother in misunderstanding, just like the ginger of the years, old and spicy. People learn to stumble in a circle, misunderstanding is sometimes like the bride's red veil, and it is always a mystery. Haven't we also seen "misunderstanding" leading to father's unkindness, son's unfilial, brother's heartlessness, brother's rudeness and even personal injury? In this tense, busy, impetuous, materialistic environment, who can avoid misunderstanding, who can not be troubled by misunderstanding, that is the real liberation, that is the great realm of life.
Misunderstanding is a high wall in interpersonal communication. How to eliminate misunderstanding? I think we should learn to understand first. Understanding means that when you don't understand or misunderstand something, you should put yourself in others' shoes, learn to understand others' difficulties, and don't always look at the problem from your own standpoint. This has left a vast sky for people to communicate. Lin Zexu once said: "There are hundreds of rivers in the sea, and tolerance is great." I think that if everyone has a heart that can forgive others, many contradictions and frictions will be reduced in the world, and some original misunderstandings will be quietly dispelled.
Can you completely deal with interpersonal problems by learning to forgive? Of course, this is not enough. We need a higher level, and that is understanding. Doing is more difficult than forgiving. Understanding is only concession and tolerance. Understanding requires a comprehensive grasp of things from phenomenon to essence, and a fair evaluation, affirmation and recognition of valuable and meaningful things. However, there are always some misunderstandings in the eyes of modern people, which makes us always look at flowers in the fog. Therefore, in order to understand, we need to stand completely in an objective position and look at the problem comprehensively and from multiple angles, instead of being one-sided, isolated and subjective. True understanding is mutual, and it is to exchange sincerity for sincerity. Knowing each other is the most important thing. Understanding is difficult, and once understood, it will be great happiness. Understanding is a bridge connecting people's hearts, and people's hearts are also baptized in mutual understanding. Let's eliminate misunderstanding, try our best to understand and try our best to understand!
Deep communication rule
There are four levels of language expression: correctness, proficiency, appropriateness and art. Correctness means that language expression should conform to the norms; Proficiency means that language expression should be clear and smooth, and language expression should be appropriate and decent, that is, decent; Art is language expression, emphasizing aesthetic feeling. It can be seen that "correctness" is the foundation, "art" is the sublimation, and the status of "conciseness, coherence and appropriateness" is clear at a glance. Language expression should be concise and avoid verbosity and nonsense; Second, we should avoid ambiguity and misunderstanding; Third, we should avoid being obscure and easy to understand.
Your thoughts and words constitute the direct or indirect feelings of the other party. Are you aware of this-people can know your real purpose through feeling or subconscious? In fact, everyone can clearly know what your purpose is. Whether it is based on your personal purpose or helping them solve their own problems, they can clearly know through your thoughts and words. Then how can we be considerate of others and really help them solve their problems?
In fact, to really understand the real intention of the other party's conversation, we must spend 100% of our time listening.
Feedback is what you really think. In order to understand everything we hear, we should feedback our real thoughts to each other and constantly clarify them to avoid any misunderstanding. In the communication process, it is an important principle to ensure that we are always on the right track.
In the process of communication, never assume that you have understood each other's true intentions. When you don't understand something, ask the other person to repeat it and summarize what you think you heard, so as to give the other person a chance to correct any misunderstanding. The same word often means different things to different people.