There is an old saying in China: Look at the old at the age of three, and look at the old at the age of seven. Now China society is in a huge transition period, from an agricultural society to a commercial society. But now China's understanding of business ethics and business ethics itself is incomplete, and the phenomenon of cheating in China is everywhere in the business society. Many small businesses are caught in such a panic. How should we educate our children in such a panic? For example, we teach our children to be sincere, but after they are sincere, they are bullied by others outside; We educate our children to be kind, but we find that kind children can't be recognized by society. We will reflect on whether we should teach our children to be opportunistic and whether we should teach them to be more aggressive. Some things we adults do sometimes unconsciously show bad things to children, which has a great influence on the formation of children's own values, world outlook and outlook on life. Therefore, our policy of educating children is problematic.
The most important thing of family education-character education
Today, China has entered a very complicated era of family education. There are standards in society and standards in families, and these standards may be wrong. For example, our standard is to require children to be in the top five in the class. As long as children can be admitted to Peking University and Tsinghua, they will be successful, and even more successful at Harvard and Yale. Although this is the standard, in my opinion, it is all the wrong standard. Why is it wrong? Because it finally became the only standard of family. There are many standards for children's growth, such as whether their personality is noble, whether their personality is healthy, whether they are creative and imaginative in doing things, whether they are hardworking, and whether they dare to get up when they fall to the ground is also a standard. In China's present society, success is confined to a very narrow range. For children, getting high marks and good grades are the standard; Children who can play the piano at the age of five or six will be rewarded. In the adult world of China, we never take how many sincere friends a person has as the standard of success. The standard in our adult world is that this person has money, status and wealth.
I am deeply immersed in such pain. The first thing many people said to me after seeing me was: "Mr. Yu, you are also on the list of China's richest people now!" " No one will say, "Teacher Yu, you have a good personality." The second sentence is: "As the head of New Oriental, New Oriental is very profitable." If one day New Oriental goes bankrupt and I have no money, does anyone still think I am a success? If I become a penniless person who has to earn money by myself, someone will always come to me and say, "Teacher Yu, you are really a great person." I feel that this man is my true friend and truly recognizes my success. I think I am successful, not because I have New Oriental and I have made money, but because I have a basic principle of being a man. I have always thought that I am a kind person and a person with no evil thoughts in my heart. I have never done anything to hurt anyone since I was a child. Of course, sometimes it is possible to accidentally say something that hurts others. Some words blurt out, others will feel uncomfortable, I can apologize to him, but I certainly didn't do anything unnatural.
I think my second success lies in my willingness to help others. In fact, one can help others in any position. Now we have the conditions to donate 3 million yuan to the earthquake-stricken areas in Gansu, and we can build a New Oriental Hope Primary School for Gannan. I am happy to help them. When we have nothing, you can help others. Everyone thinks that it takes talent to do things, but there is actually another way. I gave a simple example. I especially love labor since I was a child. I do farm work and housework. /kloc-when I was 0/4 years old, I won the championship of transplanting rice in our county. /kloc-when I was 0/7 years old, I was an excellent tractor driver in the county. My parents' hard work drove me to bear hardships and stand hard work. My grades have been neither bad nor bad, and my teacher doesn't care about me at all. But I want to attract the attention of teachers and classmates, so I have been cleaning the classroom since the first grade of primary school. After I arrived at Peking University, I got into the habit of cleaning my dormitory every day and persisted for four years. Therefore, our dormitory has never arranged health duty. In addition, I carry the kettle in my dormitory to fetch water for my classmates every day as a kind of physical exercise. As you can see, I'm used to fetching water. Finally, this happened. Sometimes I forget to draw water, and my classmates say, "Why doesn't Yu Hongmin draw water?" But I don't think it's a bad thing to draw water, because we are all classmates and it's natural to help each other. Some people say that I am stupid, and some people ask me what good it is to draw water like this. I believe it will be beneficial. If you do a good deed, its reward may appear this year or after 10. If you do a good deed and ask for something in return on the same day, you must be a snob and narrow-minded. You don't ask for anything in return, there will always be something in return. When you are in trouble, people around you think you are a good person. Can't they help you? Of course, I had difficulty in fetching water, and I didn't expect them to help me. But 10 years later, 1995, New Oriental has achieved a certain scale. I want to find a partner, so I go to America and Canada to find my classmates. Then, in order to lure them back, I specially changed a handful of dollars and spent a lot of money generously in the United States every day, hoping to let them know that they can also make money in China. I thought it might bring them back. Later, when they came back, they gave me a very unexpected reason. They said, "Yu, we came back to sweep the land and pump water for four years." They said, "We know you have such a spirit, so if you have food, you will definitely not give us porridge to drink." The participation of these people laid the foundation for the development of New Oriental, and New Oriental will continue to grow bigger and become a listed company in the United States, achieving today's scale.
From my experience, I want to tell my parents that if your child is not well educated and makes trouble outside, when others accuse your child, they will say, "This child is not well educated!" " "They won't say that the teacher didn't teach well, the New Oriental foreign language didn't teach well, and the uncles and aunts didn't teach well. People will say, "Like father, like son, like mother, like daughter!" " "Your child is worthless. The problem must be family education. The problems in children's growth must be the roots planted by parents. The success of a child is closely related to the correctness of parents' family education. What we teach our children is character and morality. Whether children can be educated in character and morality is the key to their success in life. As long as he is a respected figure, his life will be particularly smooth. Parents can think about it, do you want to be a popular person or a person who is guarded everywhere? Many parents are teaching their children to be narrow-minded, take advantage of others, and find ways to surpass and step on others. The result is that children don't know how to survive in this world. What you give your child, what kind of person your child will become in the future.
My daughter's learning level is in the middle now, but I never take it as the standard of her efforts. My wife and I have diametrically opposed educational ideas. My wife is very angry that my daughter can't get into the top five, but I am just the opposite. I am very happy that my daughter ranks 15. I always say to my daughter, "Look at 40 students in your class, you are 15, and there are 25 people behind." You are amazing! " Judging from your child's life, there is no essential difference between whether your child's grades are good or bad and whether he enters Peking University or an ordinary university. People who are related to people can really widen the distance between children all their lives, which is a matter of personality. The establishment of character comes from the power of example, and parents can't escape as role models for their children. What we ask our children to do is invalid because parents don't do it. For example, when parents are playing mahjong, they scold their children to study, but of course they don't want to study. while