Mr. Nan Huai Jin said, "Don't bow to the established forces-they are already established forces, and you can't trust them. Don't compromise with the opposing opinion-since you are opposed, it's no use compromising with him. Don't woo people who disagree-people who disagree with wooing are unreliable. " This is also the meaning of "no common goal, no common goal". Coupled with different ideological purposes, it is impossible to * * * knowledge and * * *. In this regard, Mr. nan huaijin spoke his mind, and at this point, he has a profound experience.
As we all know, Mr. Nan Huai Jin is a man of great personality. Academically, he is a man of great principle. He once went to Taiwan Province Province to give lectures and do research. At first, Mr. Nan never had a formal or permanent job. He has been living in poverty for more than ten years. Faced with many temptations, he always kept a certain distance from the political forces in Taiwan Province Province at that time and was unwilling to cooperate with them.
On one occasion, Mr. nan huaijin gave a speech at Okayama Air Force Base in Kaohsiung. At that time, Chiang Kai-shek happened to be at the scene. After listening to Mr. Nan's speech, Chiang Kai-shek felt that he had met a bosom friend and was deeply moved by some of Mr. Nan's views. After Chiang Kai-shek returned to Taipei, he immediately ordered the establishment of the "Chinese Cultural Renaissance Committee" and personally wrote to invite Nan to preside over the actual work.
For Mr. nan huaijin, who was "cooking words to satisfy his hunger" at that time, it was an excellent opportunity to change his living conditions and more likely to change his academic status. However, Mr. nan huaijin unexpectedly declined politely.
Because, as Mr. nan huaijin said, "Don't bow to the established forces-they are already established forces, and they can't rely on them." Accepting such an invitation with pleasure runs counter to the idea of "sworn enemies" advocated by Mr. nan huaijin repeatedly. Mr. Nan has always adhered to a free and true attitude towards academic research, so he later said: "Since then, he has become a scholar for the imperial use, and academic freedom has disappeared. It is better to avoid them. "
Mr. nan's attitude, as the saying goes, radish and cabbage have their own love; And in the words of the ancients, do sparrows know the ambition of swans? It is precisely because of the principle of "no common cause, no common goal" that Mr. Nan has his unique academic achievements and admirable personality charm.
In the process of making friends in reality, Mr. Nan's principle is exactly what we should adhere to. If friends are not like-minded, they will go in the opposite direction over time, and they will continue to have differences and go further and further psychologically. Ideological purposes are different, and there is no way to collude with each other, but it is not said that it must be rejected; There is no way to discuss and plan one thing with each other, so we have to go our separate ways.
If you can make like-minded friends, life will be a treasure, and everything will have an object to discuss; In the face of any difficulties and obstacles, relying on each other and supporting each other is a great beauty of life. If this is the case, there will be few sighs of "I want to make friends with Qin Yao, but I have few confidants. Who will listen to the broken string?" Therefore, Mencius said, "Know yourself and know yourself, and you will be invincible. People know each other, and you know each other. "
Then, in our interpersonal communication, how can we, like Mr. nan huaijin, stick to the principle of "No common cause, no common cause" all our lives, so as to realize the friendship between gentlemen and experience the happiness like water? You can refer to the following points:
First, we should solve the problem of "it is difficult to know people" put forward by Mr. Nan, and constantly improve our ability to know people. This requires us, like Mr. nan huaijin, to read more books and read good books, starting with improving our self-cultivation; Second, there must be Mr. Nan's poverty and unyielding integrity. Free from the temptation of fame and fortune. To make friends and realize the friendship between gentlemen, we must first be a gentleman; Third, make friends in good faith, make friends politely, and be a person that others think is worth making friends with. Just like a bosom friend, like-minded friends in the world can be met but not sought. Therefore, to achieve the goal of "pursuing the same goal", we must do ourselves well first, like Mr. nan huaijin.
In the process of our interpersonal communication, if we want to realize the friendship between gentlemen and experience the happiness as plain as water, we must start from choosing friends and adhere to the principle of "no common goal, no common goal".