I remember a celebrity said: it is often not the distant mountains that make people tired, but a grain of sand in their shoes. I believe many people are deeply touched by this sentence. In daily study, life and work, many people are not without goals or platforms, but are always influenced by some subjective and objective factors, making people unhappy, unhappy or unsuccessful. These factors can be called "sand in shoes". Although these unpleasant things seem insignificant, if they are not handled in time, sand will inevitably accumulate over time, which will wear our feet, affect our pace and even affect our attitude towards life.

It is often said in the workplace that "personality determines fate", which aims to show that a person's personality largely determines a person's career accumulation, career promotion and interpersonal relationship handling. This is what many people who fail or are frustrated often talk about, as if they say it, and their failure is excusable. However, among many young people who have consulted in person, they are not without career direction, development platform and opportunities, but are influenced by some bad habits, such as playfulness, perfunctory, lack of motivation, nitpicking and so on. It is not a failure of character, but a bad habit that has become "sand in shoes". However, many people are still wasting time under the banner of confusion, but they are doing things that have nothing to do with their careers.

Sand 1: playful and perfunctory

There was once a consultant who was the project manager of a software company. Because the project is small and the leader doesn't pay attention to it, there are three members in the whole project, and all the work of the project is done by him and two other colleagues. However, due to the company's lack of early support for the project, it leads to a series of problems such as slow system access, low customer satisfaction and blocked new contracts, and the leader does not intend to send outsiders to support him. He said that at present, he just maintains the status quo, and day by day, maybe one day he will resign and leave.

I asked him what he usually does after work. He said that he likes playing games very much. He plays games most of his rest time every day. He plays games after 12 every afternoon, even five minutes before our formal consultation. I told him that it is ok to play games, but we should keep a good sense of proportion, try to reduce the time of playing games and leave time and energy for other important things. He readily agreed and promised to correct it later. However, after a few minutes of consultation, I found that he started playing games again.

I asked him, should you sort out and digest our consultation now? He replied, sorry, I'm used to it. I'll play a few games before I tidy up. A few days later, he sent me the content. Judging from the content, I think he doesn't really care, but is perfunctory. In his view, these contents are only completing the tasks assigned by me, but he doesn't realize that they are preparing for his future. I won't judge whether he is so obsessed with playing games. After all, everyone has the right to leisure. However, on the one hand, he is complaining that the project is difficult to do well and needs the support of others. On the other hand, instead of thinking about how to solve some problems in the system, I put the main rest time on the game and developed the habit of doing things perfunctory. Not only for work, but also for others.

In his own opinion, he is not without direction, let alone platform and opportunities, because these things are already available, and there may be some shortcomings and problems, but how many perfect things are there in life? On the contrary, making up for these shortcomings is the best way to exercise and improve your ability. However, he didn't use professional standards to ask himself how to overcome difficulties, but let himself play perfunctory questions by the nose, leaving problems at work unattended, always thinking about how to escape, and taking job-hopping as an excuse for not working hard. I think his future result is obvious. Even if he doesn't give up the project, the project will give up him. Even if he changes the project, will it really be smooth sailing? Perhaps, if he can correct his attitude and change his perfunctory habits on the basis of the existing platform, his career may have another scene.

Sand 2: lack of cognition

If each of us has a video camera and carefully observes some people's daily life and work, it will be clear that after work in the morning, we will watch entertainment gossip news and browse forums, watch Taobao at noon, chat, watch movies and play games after work, and day by day will pass. Although many people know in their hearts that they should work hard, struggle and get ahead. However, every day, just like Sister Xianglin, she will tell everyone about her depression or ambition. When they look back at the road they have traveled, they find that apart from the growth of age, they seem to have no accumulation and achievements.

So when asking some consultants what they mainly do every day, many people can only say something that has nothing to do with career accumulation. Moreover, some people mistakenly think that the reason why they are so mediocre and have no efforts now is because they have no direction, so they pass the time through entertainment or leisure. If once I set my direction, I will stick to it and struggle. However, I have been looking for it for several years and I have been confused for several years. I still have no idea.

This idea seems reasonable on the surface, and I want to ask them more, how to determine the direction? If you don't actively look for opportunities, will the direction automatically find you? Can you find your way by playing games or watching movies? Even if the direction comes suddenly, can you do it without accumulation? Will you give up because you have no self-confidence in the end? There are too many similar examples in life, and the "tragedy" in the workplace is staged every day. Maybe one day you will be the leading role.

When many people get used to some tedious things and a comfortable state every day, they will gradually neglect thinking, no longer have a competitive mentality, and will not think about how to improve work efficiency, let alone actively learn new knowledge. Maybe one day they will find that it is very difficult to settle down and study. I haven't accumulated much work content, and I haven't developed my work style, but I have developed many bad professional habits. Even if they change jobs, there will be many hidden dangers because of their work ability and work habits. This is also the reason why many people keep changing jobs, but they never improve their ability, because they are like works of art, lacking internal details, and will not be regarded as treasures no matter where they are placed.

For a job, it is not only as simple as knowing how to do it and finishing it on time, but also through the process of doing things to cultivate your understanding of the overall situation of the career, the establishment of working methods and thinking. Because no matter how basic the position is, you can dig out a lot of valuable content. When we understand these contents, career promotion will be more clear. Even if you apply for a job across majors, it is no longer starting from scratch, and it becomes easier. This is also the mystery why many famous corporate executives can be competent in a short time even if they change industries or have two completely unrelated jobs. Because they are using their own understanding of the nature and methods of work to adapt and get started quickly, which is ignored by many people, which leads them to change jobs in basic positions every time they apply for a job, and can't improve their understanding and ability to a higher level.

Therefore, no direction is only a superficial phenomenon. The most important thing is to understand what kind of person you are from your own life and give yourself a clear position. Even if the positioning is not particularly clear, at least you can try some efforts first. Don't always think about what you want to do in your spare time, but ask, what is your core competitiveness, and how to take the first step, the second step and the third step on the basis of the existing platform and accumulation ... And if you only look at the harvest and material, don't pay and change, and let yourself continue to be lazy, then you will gain more than a little, but only get a vicious circle of disappointment brought by countless expectations.

Sand 3: insufficient accumulation

In my consultation, I often ask the consultant about his past experience and performance. I am more concerned about the performance of college students in high school, and I am more concerned about the performance of people who work in universities. Some people may say, it's all over, why do you still care so much? In fact, although a person becomes more mature with age, many habits are lifelong, including good habits and, of course, bad habits, if not deliberately changed.

A person who is active in school will usually be active after entering the society. Because they have formed the habit of adapting to the environment, actively interacting with people, actively studying and working, and striving for their own goals, this will help them achieve greater achievements than ordinary people. However, many people who are mediocre in school often have a "three noes" principle, and they do not take the initiative, are not active and do not strive for it. Generally, these three principles will not change much after entering the workplace, but are just the "sequela" of the performance in college. I will not take the initiative to pursue and strive for anything, I will not work hard, I will not consciously know people, and I will not care about the development of industries and jobs. Because in their minds, they think that some things have nothing to do with themselves. Anyway, they don't want to pursue the rich, so let it be fate. Naturally, many opportunities for promotion and salary increase in the workplace are difficult for them, and they are the most easily confused people.

According to my own personal experience, I liked self-study very much during college, and I felt guilty almost every day if I didn't go. This habit has been maintained until now. Some people like reading at home or in the office. I think learning needs an atmosphere. A person is easily distracted or disturbed by some factors in a familiar environment, and his learning efficiency is very low. So although I have graduated for many years, I will still take some professional books to the nearby university study room in my spare time and pretend to be an older student. Maybe I am an alternative "student" in the eyes of others, but I think some good habits need to be adhered to for life as long as they are beneficial. Because of this, I can learn more knowledge and lay the foundation for my work development. In addition, this persistence has penetrated into all aspects of my work. For example, if I write an article by myself, I may not be completely satisfied at once, so I will revise it dozens of times until I am satisfied. It may seem unnecessary to many people, but some things can't be done overnight. Only by doing the first step well can there be the second and third steps. Always thinking about one step at a time, many things are difficult to really do well.

Therefore, career development is not as simple as setting a direction and then implementing it. Setting the direction needs to consider personal accumulation and reality. If a person's industry and job experience is short-board, then no amount of ideas can only be a fantasy. In fact, this group of people have a common problem, that is, they have vocational shortcomings to varying degrees, or have low academic qualifications, no vocational skills, or have personality defects. They would rather choose to cover their ears than face it squarely and make up for it. It's like finding a fish from the edge of a tree. Therefore, it is the first and key step to learn to face up to and find ways to make up for career shortcomings and develop the habit of accumulation. Otherwise, no matter how many ideas, there is no basis for implementation, it is also futile.

Sand 4: picky

A consultant told me, Miss Li, I am very relaxed and bored at work every day, and I know how to make good use of this time to learn something. I want to be a human resource, and I feel that my development prospects are better. However, I don't like paperwork, I don't like writing this and that, and I don't like making rules and regulations, because I can't write these. I asked her, it doesn't matter if she hasn't experienced it, but why not take the initiative to learn? She said that the main reason was that she didn't want to overcome difficulties, and she always felt that she had a more suitable way out, so she didn't want to learn.

In fact, young people like her, although they have goals and directions, will be bound by their own picky and inertia. We can't say that they have no motivation, because they are trying to find their way. But they are always very picky about their work, and they always set some selection conditions for themselves when they want to get high wages. This is not satisfactory, this is unacceptable. Usually, they have few constraints on themselves. They don't want to learn this or that. In the end, they didn't get a high-paying position, but they still stayed at the original point and continued to be confused.

We often say that "thinking determines the way out" and "action determines the way out", but no one says that "picky determines the way out". We can't deny that everyone has their own starting point and criteria for choosing a career, but it doesn't matter if they don't, because they can't cry when they are born. The key to many people's success in learning lies in their desire and willingness to learn. Don't always think that you can't do it first, because these are not problems at all in an era when information is so developed. The key is to see how much you like it. The process of work is a process of cultivating habits and working methods. For some people, every time you pick up a professional book, it's like going to the execution ground. I was sleepy from the first word, and I was relieved when I put it down. I don't want to see it again. What better career development can we expect from such people? Then I will say that I think my job is boring and I want to find an energetic job. However, many people can't adapt to the content behind energetic work.

The reason why many people are upset is that they have not adjusted their habits and rhythms of life and work. There are only distant "mountains" in their hearts and eyes. They are always used to being attracted by earth-shattering events, always led by high salaries, and always want to be the best in the eyes of others. However, they seldom observe and examine the people and things around them carefully, and even don't find that they have sand in their shoes or turn a blind eye. I always feel that the sand is not important, and it will disappear automatically one day. I think, if the sand is not removed, I may not reach the distant mountains, my feet will be bruised and I will lose the courage and motivation to move forward. When we choose and accept a job, we should ask ourselves more why, why can a good job be my turn? Where am I better than others? Why does this job need a high salary? What is behind the high-paying job? After thinking about these problems clearly, many people will be down-to-earth and know what their current important task is to do. On the other hand, we will not blindly pursue high-paying jobs and avoid falling into the trap behind high salaries.

In addition to the sand above, there is actually a lot of sand. Everyone should reflect on their living habits and performance, because it is the influence of these sands that makes our goals farther and farther, and makes the sand in our shoes more and more painful. At present, I believe there are still many young people playing games and watching movies in front of the computer under the banner of "confusion", wasting their youth. However, I want to say that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. It's not that you don't have a road, but that you don't even have a good road now, let alone a better one. Young people who are unhappy at work deserve sympathy, but those who are in the whirlpool of the workplace cannot put themselves in the chair of sympathy. If they even feel sorry for themselves, how much sunshine can you project into your life? At the same time, while looking at the road ahead, everyone should always pay attention to their shoes and dump the "sand" in them in time. Only in this way can they go further and more smoothly. Try to cultivate some good habits and stick to them, so that you can live a good life first, and many things will naturally be attracted, including job development and treatment, even the other half. Everyone doesn't have to be successful, but you can enjoy the indifference after giving and harvesting. This life is enough!