In the rural areas of 1980s, the concept of son preference still existed in many families. The author's family is no exception. In order to have a son, my parents have three brothers and sisters, and I don't have to ask my younger brother to be the youngest. However, parents just want a son, and there has never been a son preference in my family. Before I had a younger brother, my sister and I were very favored. With a younger brother, we are still equal.

The author was very clever when he was a child. Adults say that if the child comes to school, he will certainly have a bright future. From kindergarten to the third grade, the author's academic performance is the first, not only in the village, but also in the town. Then from teachers, classmates, neighbors, such as: "The best student in our class is a girl", "This child is smart, and others are still girls", I was really flattered at that time, and I was proud of my parents. However, some people say, "What's the use of a girl studying well? She will be someone else in the future. If she were a boy, she would honor her ancestors. " I have been worried about this sentence for many days. I don't understand that only boys can honor their ancestors. Fortunately, my parents did not prefer boys to girls, and they all strongly supported my sisters' study. My mother said, "What happened to my girl? I am still supporting the elderly. " .

In this way, the author successfully spent his childhood and was admitted to a key high school. It was a carefree life with a halo. For the author, there is almost no gender awareness. The family education and school education I received were not deliberately cultivated because I was a girl, especially at home, where I was the boss. My parents didn't ask me much about what I should and shouldn't do as a girl. On the contrary, I play like a boy, climb trees, climb walls, catch bugs, do farm work and farm like a boy. My hair was cut short. At school, people often regard me as a boy. At home, people call me tomboy.

Looking back now, at that time, I not only didn't feel any bondage because I was a girl, but also was full of pride of "who said that women are not as good as men". Now think about it, why do you have that kind of pride? It is natural for anyone to study well, but why do people think that boys are smart, it is natural and normal to study well, and it is extraordinary to have an excellent girl? In their praise, they intentionally or unintentionally added the expectation of gender roles, which invisibly influenced the people who received the praise. Because there has been a traditional concept of "men are stronger than women" since ancient times, there is a sense of superiority and pride of "who says women are not as good as men".

Mulan's joining the army is a typical example of "Who says that women are inferior to men", but in order to realize this sentence, many women have paid a heavy price since ancient times: Zhao Jun went beyond the Great Wall, the stone destroyed Wu, and Wu Zetian proclaimed himself emperor. However, what is the result? "Who says women are inferior to men" has become a reason for men to shirk their responsibilities at some time. Historically, achievements have nothing to do with women, political power has nothing to do with women, and national subjugation has something to do with women. This is the difference between responsibility and rights. As Mr. Lu Xun said: "I never believed that Zhao Jun could settle down when he left the village, and Mulan could protect Sui when she joined the army;" I don't believe the old saying that da ji destroyed Yin, Wu and Yang Guifei messed up the Tang Dynasty. The author believes that in a patriarchal society, women will never have that much power, and the responsibility for the rise and fall should be borne by men. Male writers, on the other hand, have always blamed women for their depravity. They are really worthless men. "

My Fair Lady is a gentleman.

"The pigeon off the customs, on a boat by the river, is a gentle and graceful lady and a good gentleman." I knew it by heart in junior high school, but I didn't understand its meaning. It is superficial to think that all gentlemen like to pursue my fair lady, which is the author's business. As for what my fair lady is like, I didn't imagine it at that time. Until the next semester of high school, because summer is the most beautiful season for girls, I occasionally heard some students say that XXX is really a lady. So the author pays attention to a lady: tall and slim figure, wearing a pink dress and two croissants, beautiful face, gentle and slow behavior. So such a girl is called a lady. Suddenly one day, one of the author's roommates said to the author, "Oh, you see how you are so lady in class and so crazy in the dormitory." "How can I be a lady?" The author stared at her doubtfully. "When you come to class, you sit quietly in your seat, don't talk to the boys around you, and don't talk loudly and laugh. It seems so quiet. " The author described by the roommate was dumbfounded and dizzy. This is also called a lady!

The author specially found a book with this poem, in which the word "Shu" is interpreted as "kindness", and a lady is a kind woman. But what is the image of a lady in the eyes of students? Quiet and restrained, beautiful and slim, elegant and slow, not casually talking and laughing, just like Teacher He Chunkun said, "A lady who can't keep silent, can't pick her shoulders, can't lift her hands, and has no voice when she opens her mouth." Girls in universities also have many images of ladies, especially in the eyes of boys, who are lively and love to laugh. It is not surprising that her words. When I entered the China Women's College, I was sometimes glad that I didn't have to restrain my posture against my will and could express myself at will. Unexpectedly, occasionally a classmate called and asked, "Do you have long hair? Is your girls' school going to teach makeup and shape? " The author fainted again. What logic is this? Later, I learned that "girls who go to college are almost all girls with long hair, and boys like girls with long hair." "See if you have been wronged, and is likely to be misunderstood. I used to have short hair, but now I keep it. Haircuts are too expensive here. If you follow other people's logic, thanks to the author, otherwise no boy will like the author.

Thinking of myself in high school is really a depressed student. Because of the gap in academic performance and the poverty at home, competitive writers become silent, especially in class, when I don't have the courage to communicate with others, I become silent. In the eyes of girls, the author is a so-called lady, but in the eyes of boys, she is a lofty and talented woman, so few people dare to approach the author. Such judgments are all caused by traditional social culture. The phrase "My Fair Lady, Gentleman is Good" makes many girls lose their true colors, and they are naturally lively and cheerful but have to force themselves to play the role of a lady. How many men pay more attention to the image of a lady when making friends and ask their girlfriends to be gentle and obedient. Although today's society is an era of individuality, I have also seen many women go their own way and be themselves with individuality, but they are also walking under pressure and taking risks. Fortunately, there are many men with personality who no longer look at women with traditional eyes. "Radish and cabbage have their own love" gives many women reasons not to dress up as ladies.