The voice of "fraternity" is all over the world, but the name of "benevolence" is rarely heard again! Although "fraternity" is not a patent of western culture, let alone Christianity, when we use the word "fraternity", we often unconsciously associate it with western culture and think it is a beautiful word imported from the west. Let's praise "fraternity", which is no problem; However, when we praise "fraternity", we ignore, despise and belittle "benevolence", which is a problem, because it is accompanied by the loss of self-esteem and self-confidence in China culture!
Does China culture talk about "fraternity"? The Analects of Confucius says "universal love". Isn't this "universal love"? Mozi said "universal love". Isn't this "universal love"? In Zhouyi, it is said that "morality carries everything" and "life is easy". Isn't this "fraternity"? Isn't "advocating virtue" in Laozi, that is, "being born without it, not relying on it, long without killing it", equal to "universal love"? However, China culture does not simply talk about this kind of "fraternity", because it is only the inevitable result of "pushing love", but it is not a way.
Everyone knows that "the old man is old, the young man is young, and the young man is young", but it is impossible to say that you have the same love for your parents and other people's parents, and you have the same love for your children and other people's children. Confucius said, "Unless it's a ghost, it's over-praised." We should sacrifice to our ancestors, not others. If someone sacrifices other people's ancestors instead of their own, then what is the reason why this person does not flatter others? Similarly, if a person does not honor his parents and love his children, but respects other people's parents and loves other people's children, can his mentality be considered normal? Therefore, love is hierarchical and cannot be exactly the same. From filial piety to filial piety, from loving one's own children to loving others' children, it needs a "push" process. Without this process, there will be two situations: one is to only honor one's parents without respecting others' parents, and only love one's children without paying attention to others' children. This is selfish "filial piety" and "love". The other is to treat parents and children equally. Is this possible? Can a wife be as filial to her in-laws and parents as her husband is to them? Filial piety is sincere from the heart, and filial piety to in-laws or parents-in-law is cultivated out of reason.
How to realize this "push" process? First, "I want to stand up, I want to touch people"; Second, "Don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you"; Third, "Kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss"
The first one is familiar to everyone, but it depends on whether we have tried our best to implement it in our own actions. Everyone has his own ideal pursuit. When we want to realize our ideal pursuit, have we ever thought about not affecting the ideal pursuit of others? Have you ever thought about helping others realize their ideal pursuit when conditions permit? What we often see is that some people deliberately slander and hurt others behind their backs in order to achieve their own goals, which is despicable; Some people don't help even if they can, for fear that others will surpass their own goals and even gloat when the other party encounters misfortune. This is selfish. Mean people will be spurned by others; Selfish people have no real friends.
9 O5 a3 O9 Z" C9 x The second article is familiar, but it is more difficult than the first one. When encountering difficulties or dangers, avoid them, fearing that the better is not the better, but pushing others to the front; When you need to take risks, you pass the buck, but let others take responsibility; Seeing others traveling around the world to save the world, I was ridiculed as a "lost dog", and then I insulted those who were regarded as saints by the public. Such people have no love at all. How can he "push himself and others"? Such a person can't talk about "worrying about the world first, and enjoying the world later" because he makes others do things they don't like, even cynically after others do it, or takes the advantages of others for himself.
(h" v" F: H4 }) V/ J, [* K The third article is about the order of pushing love. "Mencius with all my heart" said: "A gentleman is to things, and love is benevolent; Be kind to the people and be kind. Be kind to the people, be kind to the people and love things. " In other words, people only cherish animals and plants, but they can't talk about benevolence. Because benevolence is the love between people, it is said that "the benevolent loves others", and the love for animals and plants cannot be called benevolence. Therefore, animals and plants can be used as our food, but we should cherish them and not lose control for luxury enjoyment, otherwise it will be a waste of time. Officials should be kind to the people, but not intimate. They should keep a proper distance, because once officials are too close to the people, it is difficult to maintain a just heart. Therefore, "if you are near, you will feel inferior, and if you are far away, you will be angry." Officials only need to respect the personality and nature of the people. Children need to be close to their parents, but this is not just a question of kindness, because closeness includes kindness, but kindness does not. So there is a natural relationship between parents and children. Once this natural relationship is destroyed, the family will break down, which will shake the foundation of social stability.
! } 2 t7j * O & amp； L. c8 P. C Some people will say, "What if I am only asked to be kind to others and others don't care about me? My brothers and sisters are not filial to their parents. Why should I respect them? " China culture advocates "self-righteousness", just as Confucius said: "Bow to yourself and lightly blame others." You know, only when we are kind to others can others be kind to me; We will not be kind to others. Who are we to ask others to be nice to us? You know, my parents and my brothers and sisters are my parents, but they are my parents. When my parents are in pain, it is my parents who are in pain. If I can honor my parents, then my parents and my brothers and sisters will avoid suffering. Therefore, filial piety is entirely up to me, so why climb others.
，M8 B t！ O: Henry in the Book of Changes of D. K # Y \' HVR+_ Yuan corresponds to benevolence, propriety, righteousness and wisdom. Benevolence here is a part of the "five permanents", which together is the avenue of life. Kong Anguo said in "Preface to the Book of History": "The book of Huang San is called the Three Graves, and the Tao is also; The book of the Five Emperors, named Five Codes, has a common saying. " "Benevolence" in the "five permanent members" is "love" and belongs to the "common way", that is, an aspect of "virtue" based on virtue. On this basis, we can reach the realm of benevolence in the avenue, which means benevolence and perfection, and the realm of benevolence and goodness means universal love and universal love, but if there is a process of pushing, that is our ideal realm; If we talk about "universal love" and "universal love" without the process of "pushing", it will lead to "false love" and "excessive love" that people treat their parents as other people's parents.
1 [8 H2 e 1 m* M* i "benevolence" is based on a foothold and pushed to people at the same time, while "fraternity" has no foothold and talks about love; "Kindness" is real, while "fraternity" is chaotic. If they don't love their own people, can they really love other people? They are not filial to their parents. Can they really respect other people's parents? They don't care about their children. Can they really care about other people's children? They don't care about their relatives. Do they really care about their friends? They care more about cats and dogs than their relatives! It is wrong for us to choose culture to talk about "fraternity" instead of "benevolence"!