How can we improve our interpersonal skills and improve our expressive ability and self-confidence? Combined with your own experience, I hope to help you a little:
First, be confident. If we don't have self-confidence, we will start to be timid before meeting friends or strangers. How can I speak freely and get along well with everyone? But how to gain self-confidence? Whether you are extroverted or introverted, you can also gain self-confidence. Self-confidence is a kind of cognition of oneself and a scientific evaluation based on objective understanding. When I say that I am inferior to someone in some way, it is an objective understanding of myself. When I say that I am good at this, better than so-and-so, but I still need to improve, it is also an objective understanding. This is the basis of self-knowledge and self-confidence, or where self-confidence begins.
Everyone knows what self-confidence is-smile, hold your head high. We often ignore another manifestation of self-confidence, such as calm thinking when praised, objective analysis when wronged, perseverance in adversity, introspection and cautious independence in prosperity.
By self-confidence, we mean tolerating others' shortcomings while tolerating our own. While affirming one's own advantages, correctly understand one's own disadvantages; Is to face yourself with a healthy and positive attitude (true and objective self, good and bad self) and firmly believe that I can do it, I can do it. This is my weakness, but I can overcome or avoid it in this way. Self-confidence is conducive to the open-mindedness of self-exertion, and is not conducive to the modest study and serious summary of self-exertion. As long as this time is more successful than the last time, as long as there is still a kind of thinking and firm belief about progress and transformation.
But when we find that we are not good at communication and humor to impress and attract people, we begin to think: Can we attract people, communicate with others, gain others' approval and lead teachers in another way that we can do?
Second, find a method that suits you and improve your ability to communicate with others.
Everyone has his own length. What is your length? I am not a very talkative person, but when I am particularly good at a certain field, I find that I can express my ideas well and talk harmoniously with people. It is found that people's humor is not innate, and people's good at words is not directly related to extroversion. It is directly related to the knowledge you have mastered and the way you have mastered it. It's important to keep studying. Study hard and think often. In the process of reading, you can know yourself and your life. This understanding can enrich your language and expression. Always read some humorous stories and interesting articles and master some communication skills. For example, some questions can be answered skillfully without direct answer, which can not only alleviate the passivity and embarrassment in conversation, but also play a role in regulating the atmosphere sometimes. Pay attention to the effect of your expression, not what others think of you. For example, when a person chats with a friend, he reveals a little privacy and makes everyone laugh. What if he is shy at this time? Everyone must pay more attention to the privacy he said. If he is happy with everyone and says it is interesting, he will be happy when he remembers it. Is it possible to distract everyone? Because you are calm, everyone will not care too much about it, just laugh it off.
This is a daily - happened thing. Communication is the embodiment of a person's wisdom, and wisdom is mobilized by self-confidence. If we discipline ourselves in our own way, our wisdom will be suppressed invisibly. If we are confident, we may establish a reputation of "waking the dreamer with a word" among our friends because of a wise language. Besides, humor is also a manifestation of wisdom. 1, smile
Listening is the most important thing.
Observe people's manners and expressions carefully, but don't be too obvious, so as not to make people think you have intentions.
There are some things you know but don't need to say, because many people hate talking.
5. Don't be too wordy. First of all, you should have a good mood to face everyone, be optimistic, pay attention to other people's answers and know what they like, so that you can chat with them, but I think you should study more and acquire more knowledge in peacetime, so that you can know a lot, no matter what the other person says. In a word, I think the main thing I can talk about is that I am well informed. I'm a girl, too, and others evaluate me more.
First of all, recharge your batteries, improve your temperament and self-cultivation, and don't let others look down on you.
Secondly, pay attention to fashion, current affairs and trends, so that when chatting with girls, we can have a topic to discuss the TV or stars we have seen or the latest fashion clothes, and so on. Girls love gossip! When chatting with boys, don't think so much. Generally, boys are looking for topics to talk about. You just have to follow him. Girls should be reserved and talk to boys implicitly.
Also, it is important to look into each other's eyes when communicating with each other, which shows that you are not absent-minded.
Finally, a sense of humor is really important. That's right. My personal opinion is:
1. First of all, if you want to deal with happy and generous people, you must put down your psychological burden. You did nothing wrong. Some people are worried about you.
If you can't communicate, just ignore them;
You can be humorous, so that boys will like you more. Personally, I think "humorous" girls are all big hearts.
Good communication, no trouble, and very tolerant, so serious and tired every day!
You'd better check your living habits and past experiences. Most of the problems are with you and your habits.
In the memory of the past, we should carefully understand and feel our own growth, environment and external factors.
Go ahead, analyze comprehensively, find yourself and self-confidence, and you will usher in a happy spring.
If you want others to accept your point of view, you must first make them like you, so that your words are more convincing than others.
People who trust you and like to associate with you will naturally feel confident. Man's greatest enemy is himself, so you must first learn to overcome psychological obstacles. You have to understand that people always pay more attention to themselves than others. This is man's self-centered nature. In fact, you always feel that you are not doing well and are ashamed, but in fact, others may not notice or care at all, so after understanding this, you must be confident and do what you want. Say what you want to say. Try to put aside all your troubles and be happy, no matter what others say. In fact, this process is also the cultivation of personality. Everything needs a process. Don't put too much pressure on yourself, just take your time. Everyone said to himself, "I'm great!" " Your kindness, your kindness, your confidence and your demeanor will make others feel happy when they are with you. Pay attention ~'
When you treat yourself, you should know that tomorrow is a new day, and you are not who you were yesterday. Always keep a good mood, maybe someone is in need of your help; Don't hate your own shortcomings, people who have no shortcomings usually have no advantages; Don't feel sorry for your ordinary, even the darkest star is dazzling compared with the boundless darkness; Keep a balanced mind, and anger will come and go quickly.
In this way, you will find that you are actually excellent, others are actually cute, your work is actually very satisfactory, and your life is actually beautiful.
When dealing with people, you should know: you should know the strengths and advantages of others; When talking with people, smiling is the best language, and listening is better than a long speech; Don't pry into other people's private affairs. If you accidentally know, keep it as a secret. Praise from others is like perfume. You can smell it, but if it is true, it will be terrible to drink it. Admit to let others point out your no, they will only respect you and will not despise you; When friends are sad and frustrated, they must be close. When friends are happy, they might as well leave a little. Walk with others, don't walk too fast, don't get too close, and give others some room to advance and retreat; To blend in with others, you need the same language and hobbies. You can understand their world and then infiltrate it, but you can't lose yourself because of it, you can only adapt. Note that you can have fun with everyone, but close people must be people who can understand you. If you do this, if they still can't find your goodness, they can only say that they are not suitable to be your friends.
You are happy, and I am happy. You must have a happy mood first. To infect others, to be happy. It's simple. Your happy and unhappy mood will infect your pet. Let alone people.
Look in the mirror when you get up every day and give the person in the mirror a smile.
Look at the sky every day when you go out. Rain or shine. Give the sky a smile.
Eat fruit every time. Look at the fruit first. Give the fruit a smile.
Confidence and happiness. So simple. I believe you can do it. Self-confidence means believing in yourself! First of all, you deny yourself and you can't give others happiness. Actually, anyone can. You must believe that if you want to be happy, you must tell your friends about the happy things you have encountered, so that your happy breath can infect your friend and make her in your happy atmosphere. Isn't that great? This will naturally make you more confident and happy! I am also a very popular girl. My greatest strength is my sense of humor. If you don't have a keen sense of fashion about clothes, be a clean and natural girl. (Or make yourself different) Read more books, read more famous books, read more novels and give more speeches. All the knowledge is actually comprehensive, which can cultivate your imagination and language ability. When I have time, I will write something. Looking back at what you wrote quickly, you will find that you have potential that you didn't even find yourself. From now on, it doesn't matter if you write badly. It will get better gradually. Write down your feelings, feelings or thoughts. Slowly, you will be confident. I wish you success ~ ~ ~' I wonder if you have noticed such a phenomenon: on the issue of love, the higher the master, the more they will vote against it. No matter how good they are, how good their answers are, some people still don't buy them. In other words, no matter who he is, it is impossible for everyone to like him. Everyone's preferences are different, and everyone's characteristics are different. The smartest thing to do is not to try to change yourself and cater to others' good feelings (because it is an extremely thankless thing), but to learn to show your own characteristics, so that people who like this feature can see your characteristics and like you. For example, if you lack humor, don't work hard on it, but strengthen yourself where you are good at it. When talking with others, you can talk about what you like, so that you have something to say, and you will soon find confidence in this area. I wish you progress and happiness! It is not necessarily good to praise each other more, but praise is indeed a very effective method. You can try. Besides, why can't girls be humorous? I don't think it makes sense. I think you can do it too. There is no difference between men and women! Smile, listen and stare, and have your own dignity and stand.
One more thing, people can't like you. Once upon a time, like you, I was careful to please others, and I also wanted to be kind to others. However, many things have failed, and I am less and less confident in this respect. Sometimes I even feel a little nervous. I don't know what to say. I have experienced a lot of things and had a lot of feelings. I hope I can share them with you and I hope you can get rid of your troubles as soon as possible.
1, the most important thing for a person is to grasp what he can grasp. "Although you have the right attitude, such as respecting each other and making others feel valued", these are all within your control. "But when it comes to specific methods, I don't have any ideas" because the part you can grasp in front is deliberate and not really natural, which leads to "What topic should I talk about? How to talk about it appropriately, appropriately and happily? " For example, I am answering your question. If I want to help you, I need to know something about you and judge you. After reading your questions and answers, many of them may be subjective. I think you are a very positive person, not a complaining person, but a person who wants to constantly improve himself and achieve his goals. I personally admire such people, especially in the current social environment. So I hope such people can reduce their troubles and be more happy. Even if you don't agree with me, at least you can know that there is such an idea in the world, which can be regarded as opening your mind. I turned around just to show that I can handle your worry (my subjective wish), and I will try to stand in your position (this is my subjective wish). This is a natural and relaxed topic between us. If you understand, will you be unhappy? If a person does things too deliberately, it will make the other person ignore your sincerity. You are tired, others are not relaxed.
2. A happy person from the heart can naturally infect people around him. If you don't understand my kindness or I misinterpret you, I shouldn't be unhappy, because I should be happy to choose what I think is right, and the other person's evaluation is beyond my control. The so-called kindness will make you relaxed. You will find that there are many things that make you happy in life. The whole person will be relaxed and happy, and his attitude towards people will change greatly. You may even think that dealing with interpersonal relationships is a wonderful thing. A cheerful and open-minded person can really infect many people. My office used to be a place where my colleagues took the initiative to "report" in the morning, which was by no means what I could have thought of before.
It is an eternal truth that one person can't call a hundred people's hearts. Don't try to challenge yourself. People can pursue perfection, but no one can achieve it. Being too perfect is a pathological condition. I recommend you to watch the American drama Desperate Housewives, which will give you some inspiration.
Do what you choose happily, find reasons to praise, smile and listen to each other sincerely, and you will sincerely find that many people like something, and at the same time, more and more people like a certain part of you (don't expect everything, because you are not satisfied with yourself).
I don't know if you realize that a person can't be liked by everyone for no reason.
What topic to talk about, not every topic is suitable for you, everyone has his own preferences, and sometimes you don't like what others say or don't know what is going on at all. You can listen to it. Maybe you have your opinion after listening? Just try it. We can also talk about our favorite things together. Don't follow other people's topics.
To get the respect of others, we must first respect others ~ ~!
Be confident and depend on yourself! Come on!
Wish you success! !