Therefore, the bad atmosphere of pursuing pleasure, coveting comfort, chasing fashion and showing off is becoming more and more serious among students. This kind of thought is embodied in behavior: not loving labor, afraid of being dirty and tired; Eat snacks and spend more change; Dress well and compare with each other. Nowadays, the bad habits of pursuing pleasure, coveting comfort, pursuing fashion and showing off are becoming more and more serious among students. This kind of thought is embodied in behavior: not loving labor, afraid of being dirty and tired; Eat snacks and spend more change; Dress well and compare with each other. There are also a few middle school students who only ask for property, but they don't know how to be frugal. They felt very comfortable and played the role of lifting a finger. Once their personal material needs are not met, they will be dissatisfied and complain to their parents. A student never visited his mother consciously and voluntarily during his mother's illness in hospital, but was forced to visit the hospital at the urging and compulsion of his father. It is understood that this is a good student. She thinks she lives a happy life. Her parents love her, and she loves her parents. The reason why she didn't go to the hospital to see her mother was because she was too nervous about her study. Afterwards, her mother said with deep feeling that the child didn't know how to give warmth to others! 2. Case of rebellious psychology: Case: 15-year-old Zhang is a junior high school student who is currently recuperating at home on the grounds of illness. When I was in the first grade, I was worried about the teacher's embarrassment because I was in conflict with the class teacher. After the first year of junior high school, he strongly urged his parents to transfer for him, saying that as long as he changed to a new environment, he was determined to return to normal study. At that time, parents thought that what the child said was very reasonable, so they transferred their children to other schools. But after a year, Zhang proposed to transfer again because of friction with two main course teachers. At this time, parents didn't realize the problem, so they used the relationship to choose a school far from home for their children. However, Zhang has been unable to adapt to the new environment since he entered the third year of junior high school. He often feels inexplicable loneliness and anxiety, and finally refuses to go to school. Analysis: It is normal for students and teachers to have conflicts. However, some students arbitrarily expand this widespread contradiction and think it is a very serious matter, and then infer that teachers will never treat themselves fairly, resulting in unbearable psychological pressure. At this time, if parents can guide their children to put themselves in other's shoes, reflect on themselves and help them correctly understand and handle the relationship with teachers, their problems can be fundamentally solved. However, this is not the case in Zhang's case. Facing the contradiction, he and his parents chose to escape and tried to avoid the contradiction by transferring, but Zhang's problem was not solved. Due to the transfer, Zhang has to face unfamiliar interpersonal relationships, and the possibility of interpersonal conflicts has greatly increased. When the same contradiction occurs, he still has no ability to solve it. As a result, his behavior will inevitably retreat further-once again, he avoids contradictions by transferring schools. No wonder Zhang finally refused to go to school. This case is very representative. Zhang's psychological problems are caused by bad interpersonal relationships. Therefore, reminding parents to pay attention to the harmonious development of children's interpersonal relationships is the best policy of education. Once there is a problem in children's interpersonal relationship, teach them to face up to and actively solve the contradiction. This is the old saying that "where you fall, you will get up". Due to the characteristics of middle school, many students can't treat their parents' pains and teachers' criticism and education correctly because they lack the ability to distinguish right from wrong. They doubt everything, are neither humble nor supercilious, treat positive propaganda negatively, deny role models and advanced figures for no reason, have emotional identification with bad tendencies, and passively resist ideological education and discipline requirements. 3. Inferiority (looks, poor family economy is also possible) Some middle school students often make mistakes because of poor academic performance, so no matter at home or at school, they criticize more than praise, blame more than encouragement, and punish more than guidance. So I think I have no hope of inferiority, and become disheartened, negative and decadent, depressed and self-destructive, and negative and decadent, forming the inferiority complex of "I am not as good as people". There are also some middle school students who can't accept themselves without some defects and shortcomings. They often put themselves in a position of inferiority and dislike, are indecisive, have no sense of competition and can't enjoy the happiness of success. Second, the causes of psychological problems of middle school students 1. The influence of family and parents' unreasonable expectations often become the important reasons for middle school students' psychological problems. Generally speaking, there are two kinds of unreasonable parents' expectations: one is too high and the other is too low. Expectation is too high, that is, parents want their children to be admitted to key high schools and famous universities regardless of their abilities, interests and original level. Parents who hold this attitude often think that the higher their expectations, the greater their children's motivation to learn. When their children fail to achieve their parents' expected goals, they will be scolded, abused and even beaten. As a result, some students are anxious, tired of learning and even run away from home. Expectations are too low, and parents with this attitude are indifferent to their children's learning, regardless of whether they ask or not, thinking that as long as they can get a diploma, they can find a job in the future. Therefore, the requirements for children are not strict at ordinary times, and the goals set for children are also very low. Slowly, children lose interest in learning and lack self-motivation and curiosity. A special family refers to a family whose parents are divorced and have lost their father or mother. The common feature of special families is that children have lost their normal family education. Generally speaking, the impact of divorced families on children is psychological trauma first. They can't enjoy the love of normal families, and they are easy to feel inferior and stressed. At school, they often feel that they are short and looked down upon, so they leave their classmates, unsociable and depressed, which leads to a decline in academic performance, tense interpersonal relationships, and even a decline in conduct and abnormal personality. Once corrupted and wooed by criminals, it is easy to embark on the road of crime. The loss of a father or mother's family makes children feel the pain of losing their father's love or mother's love, which is a great blow to their lives. Some students are devastated, their academic performance drops, and their mood is low, showing the characteristics of less communication and loneliness, and their personality development is prone to obstacles. However, in 2008, some parents worked in other places and seldom took care of their children's learning problems, giving students a wrong idea that "reading is useless". In the current economic situation; Xue was brought up by his grandmother since childhood, and he was strong all his life. Since Xue was sensible, she instilled in Xue that "only key middle schools have the hope of being admitted to universities;" Only by being admitted to the university can there be a way out in the future. Xue's reality is that his grades have been in the middle and lower reaches of his class, and Xue's ideal is to attend a key middle school. At the beginning of the new semester, when Xue heard the teacher's mobilization for the senior high school entrance examination "there are only three months left before the senior high school entrance examination", he was soberly aware of the huge gap between reality and ideal for the first time, so Xue strongly urged his parents to give up this year's senior high school entrance examination and choose to repeat it. For parents, the statement that "you can succeed in any school as long as you work hard" is simply unacceptable. Xue insisted that he was born different from others, and he just wanted to go to a key senior high school entrance examination and a key university. Whether to take the senior high school entrance examination or choose to repeat, Xue's parents were confused and realized that their children might have psychological problems, so they asked for help. Analysis: On the surface, Xue can't see the hope of entering a key middle school because of his current learning situation, which is inconsistent with his fixed concept of childhood. Therefore, he strongly urged to repeat the exam to avoid the possible failure of the senior high school entrance examination. However, the problem is by no means so simple. It is not difficult to see from Xue's simple information that Xue has "only key middle schools have the hope of being admitted to universities;" There are some misconceptions and cognitive biases, such as "I was born different from others, so I want to take a key senior high school entrance examination and a key university" and "if I choose to repeat, I will be 100% sure to be admitted to a key high school". Therefore, choosing to repeat or take the senior high school entrance examination is not the key to Xue's problem. Xue should receive psychotherapy first, fundamentally correct his wrong ideas and cognitive biases, and re-form a reasonable cognition. The problem of Xue's re-reading or senior high school entrance examination will be solved. However, Xue's materials are too simple. If Xue has other problems, that's another matter. 2. The middle school stage of students' own reasons is the "crisis period" or "psychological weaning period" stage of individual development. This stage is at the crossroads of life. This stage is the puberty when the physiology matures rapidly, but the psychological development can't keep up with the physiological development. Easy to be subjective and one-sided; Emotions and feelings are developing day by day, but their polarity is serious, their self-control is poor, and they are prone to rebellion and confrontation. Therefore, the middle school stage is bound to be a stage of serious polarization of students' psychological development. 3. Interpersonal communication among middle school students The so-called interpersonal communication refers to the communication between people in a certain way, and the psychological relationship between people formed on the basis of communication is called interpersonal relationship. Let's look at an example. Han, 17, outgoing and sociable, but extremely unpopular. The reason is that they are too self-centered. They often brag about themselves in front of their classmates, their experiences and family wealth, and constantly tell others about their trivial life, but they are never interested in other people's problems and never pay attention to their feelings and reactions. In the interaction with classmates, we should always strive to express ourselves and make ourselves the center of classmates' attention. I embellished other people's mistakes and shortcomings, exaggerating them, causing my classmates to laugh, and I thought I was very proud. In fact, there are many middle school students with bad personality habits like Han around us. I don't know if you have the following situation. (The blue part can be removed or kept) 1. Expectations are different from others, but some people are unwilling to be strict with themselves and go their own way. 2. I love vanity and often like to show off myself to win the favor of others. 3. The attitude is too serious, even hypocritical, often unsmiling, and the estimation is lofty and hypocritical. 4. Strong self-esteem. No matter what you do wrong, you always make excuses for yourself, or pass the buck and blame others. 5. Vague, secretive and dishonest. 6. Abuse of popular words, ignorance of pretending to understand, grandiose and vulgar tone, full of slang and foul language. 7. Pay too much attention to other people's opinions and comments, treat people with different opinions as dissidents and hold a grudge. 8. I don't invest enough in others, I don't take the initiative to communicate with others, and I often prevaricate others because I am busy or have no time. 9. Envy others' superior position in life and their academic achievements. 10. procrastination, inefficiency, excessive hesitation in making decisions, and frequent repetition of commitments. 1 1. Pay attention to the loyalty of brothers. No matter how good or bad things are, whoever is right or wrong, as long as brothers are in trouble, they will do their best. The interpersonal communication of middle school students is mainly with friends, classmates, teachers and parents. Friendship occupies a very important and special position. Friendship between friends is called friendship, which is an emotional relationship based on the consistency and mutual attachment of ideals, interests and hobbies. Research shows that parents are the most emotionally attached objects in childhood, while friends are in a relatively secondary position. With the growth of age, the focus of this emotional attachment gradually shifts from parents to friends, and it is increasingly determined and strengthened. Research shows that most people think they make the most friends in middle school. 2. The phenomenon of small groups is prominent. Because of the accessibility in space, the same age and the same character, most middle school students join informal small groups. The members of these small groups have high loyalty to each other and are also very binding in behavior. 4. It's easy to alienate parents. Many middle school students find it difficult to communicate with their parents. They would rather talk to their close friends than their parents. No matter in values, ways of making friends, living habits, or even dressing, it is easy to have friction with parents, which constantly aggravates the psychological barrier with parents. In a word, because of the obvious enhancement of self-awareness, independent desire and self-esteem, middle school students are eager for interpersonal communication, but they are also prone to psychological obstacles such as atresia, defense, inferiority and "arrogance", which should be overcome. 4. Middle school students' test anxiety is an emotional reaction that seriously affects the performance of test scores. Students with high test anxiety have obvious physiological and psychological reactions before the test, such as excessive worry, fear, insomnia, forgetfulness, loss of appetite, diarrhea and other symptoms; Panic, shortness of breath, sweating and trembling hands and feet, frequent toilet use, shallow thinking, poor judgment and blank brain during the exam; Some students have dyskinesia in the examination room, such as: unable to see the questions clearly, misreading the questions, losing the questions, stiff movements, hands out of control, clerical errors and so on. Case: 17-year-old Yang will graduate from high school this year. His grades in Grade One and Grade Two are among the top five in his class. He is a good seed in a key university, and both teachers and parents have high hopes for her. Since entering the third year of high school, there have been many exams and quizzes in the school. Strangely, first, there was a unified examination in the whole school, and then even the unit examination made her have diarrhea inexplicably. Once the examination was finished, the illness healed itself. I went to the hospital for repeated examination, but I couldn't find anything wrong. However, the results were affected, and the results gradually fell from the original top five to more than a dozen. Now, before every exam, she always asks her parents and teachers over and over again, "What if I have diarrhea again and fail the exam?" "Parents and teachers comforted her, saying that her foundation is that everyone recognizes her strength. Diarrhea affected her performance only temporarily. However, this kind of thing happens more often, and parents also have doubts in their hearts: Is the child psychologically problematic? Analysis: Yang had diarrhea during the exam, but the result of repeated examination was no problem. It can be preliminarily inferred that the root cause of Yang's diarrhea is not the digestive tract problem. Yang has been ranked in the top five in his class and is considered as a good seed of key universities. Teachers and parents have high hopes for her. It is conceivable that Yang is the darling of teachers and parents, and he must get more attention from them at ordinary times. Because of this, Yang is very concerned about his academic performance and ranking. In Yang's view, even if he drops one place, it means failure. Therefore, in the face of more and more exams, she is worried that she will not do well in the exam, which will disappoint teachers and parents, produce great psychological pressure, and eventually produce exam anxiety, which will lead to digestive system dysfunction-diarrhea. It's not that he didn't make progress, but that diarrhea affected his exam results. On the one hand, Yang finds it easy to explain to teachers and parents psychologically. On the other hand, in front of teachers and parents, Yang can still maintain a good student image and get more attention. In fact, Yang is subconsciously avoiding the exam. In the final analysis, it is her lack of confidence. Therefore, it is necessary for Yang to adopt the method of self-confidence training, establish a correct self-awareness, encourage himself more, and don't take exam results too seriously, so as to enhance his self-confidence and effectively relieve his exam anxiety. Typical case: Wang, female, 17 years old, a junior 3 student in a key high school. Because of the approaching college entrance examination, she was nervous, inattentive and inefficient in learning, so she came to consult her mother. The student was born in a teacher's family and was strictly educated by his parents since childhood. He will be severely punished if he makes mistakes occasionally in the exam. Since primary school, her academic performance has been among the best, especially after entering high school, and her comprehensive performance ranks among the top three in the whole grade. The school and parents have placed great hopes on her. However, for more than a month, she has been nervous and insomnia, and the efficiency of reading and reviewing has gone from bad to worse. The results of the mock exam are getting worse every time. Teachers and parents made her suffer from caring and complaining. Recently, she often cried or lost her temper, refused to go to school and refused to take the college entrance examination. The factors that affect students' test anxiety include internal physical and mental factors and external environmental factors (including family, school and social environment, etc.). ). The specific reasons are as follows: 1. Poor genetic and physical health. People with weak nerve types are sensitive to environmental stimuli and prone to nervous reactions. This kind of people have a high degree of test anxiety. People who are in poor health will have a strong anxiety reaction to the upcoming exams, especially the important exams. 2. Cognitive bias. Students' improper evaluation of the nature of the exam, their interest in the exam and their ability to cope easily leads to exam anxiety. If students have a biased understanding of their personal future and reputation and pay too much attention to their knowledge, experience and ability, they will be highly nervous, have a strong emotional reaction and be overly anxious during the exam. 3. Lack of knowledge preparation and test-taking experience. If students are not prepared for the content and knowledge of the exam before the exam, and lack the corresponding skills and experience, they are prone to anxiety before and during the exam, and they are at a loss when they encounter problems. 4. Parents, teachers, social pressure is too great. Generally speaking, the more strict parents are with their children, the higher their expectations are. If children are not suitable for their interests and specialties, the greater the pressure on them, and the more likely they are to have test anxiety. For example, some parents attach great importance to their children's test scores, set indicators and reward their children. When they see that their children's exam results are not satisfactory, they will reprimand, scold and stick together, which will cause heavy psychological pressure on their children and feel that "it is difficult to make a job with their parents if they don't do well in the exam." Schools unilaterally pursue the enrollment rate, engage in sea tactics, and take grades as the only criterion for evaluating students. Teachers overestimate the importance of exams, improperly evaluate and summarize the exam situation, and are autocratic to students. Students in this school atmosphere are also prone to test anxiety. At the same time, the value orientation of the whole society and the national policy system (especially the education policy system) will affect the educational methods of schools and families, and affect students' attitude and evaluation of exams. Under the great pressure of social competition for further studies and employment, students' test anxiety is more serious in the social environment of "competition by examination". Obviously, to solve the excessive test anxiety, it is far from enough to rely solely on the efforts of school teachers. However, it is extremely necessary to help students master the adjustment methods to overcome exam anxiety through psychological counseling. The key to control test anxiety is to form a normal test psychology with test-taking strategies. Examination psychology involves both intellectual and non-intellectual factors of candidates. Therefore, in order to form a normal test-taking psychology, we must stress test-taking strategies in addition to alleviating and eliminating tension and anxiety through the above two methods. To this end, we can start from the following aspects: 1 Preparation before the exam is the key to truly control and adjust exam anxiety. Candidates can really overcome their anxiety only if they devote themselves to preparing for the exam and forget the consequences of the exam. Specific methods include: (1) correctly understanding the purpose and significance of learning and establishing a correct view of examination. The real purpose of learning scientific and cultural knowledge is to acquire knowledge in a down-to-earth manner and acquire the real ability to participate in social practice activities in the future, regardless of the needs of the motherland's construction or the small aspects, and should not pursue utilitarianism and vanity excessively. Examination should be regarded as a test of a person's knowledge level, which should be paid attention to ideologically, but not taken too seriously and become a burden. We should focus on how to meet the exam and don't think too much about the result. Learn to actively hint and adjust anxiety. (2) Set appropriate expected goals. It is not appropriate to set the goal too low or too high, especially if the goal is set too high and divorced from reality. Once failed and frustrated, candidates will feel nervous and affect the exam. (3) combine work and rest and use your brain scientifically. After studying for an hour or two, you should take more walks outdoors, breathe fresh air, or do more neck exercises to increase your body's support, or overlook the natural scenery to give your brain a chance to rest. Timely distract the attention that is excessively directed and focused on the exam, and reduce the psychological pressure. Two or three days before the exam, the main task is not to study, but to adjust the preparation status. In order to restore and strengthen the function of the brain, it is necessary to combine work with rest and strengthen the hygiene of using the brain. (4) Review the exam scientifically and reasonably. According to the law of brain activity, arrange the review time scientifically and reasonably. Conduct a comprehensive and systematic review according to the requirements of the syllabus and examination syllabus of each subject. Pay attention to the key points when reviewing in detail, including the key points of learning requirements and my weak links; Familiar with all kinds of questions and proposition principles; We should pay attention to methods, including the arrangement of time, the collocation of disciplines, the application of scientific memory methods and the cleaning up of knowledge system. 2. The exam should be calm and flexible. After you get the test paper, browse the whole volume first. When answering questions, do "four first, four later, one quick and one slow", that is, do easy questions first and then difficult questions, do familiar questions first and then unfamiliar questions, get high scores first and then low scores, and do the same type of questions first and then do different types of questions; Slow in examining questions, fast in doing them. Don't walk into a dead end of a problem you can't do. On the one hand, we should actively recall the relevant knowledge, "not horizontally but vertically", and queue the possible answers to make the brain and nerves in an excited state, so as to recall the knowledge more quickly and establish contact and communication. On the other hand, in the case of ensuring that the easy questions are foolproof, we should chew hard bones and to what extent. Don't be careless about easy questions and be eager for success; Don't hesitate and delay when you are not sure about the problem. 3. Post-test summary: After each test, avoid all post-test discussions and complete the test completely. Don't drag your feet, so as not to have a sense of failure, guilt, regret and disappointment when discussing with your classmates and finding that the answer is inconsistent with everyone; In order not to let the bad mood of the exam affect the mental state of the whole exam, all subjects are "connected". At the same time, we should also pay attention to adjusting our mentality and prepare for the next exam. But when the whole exam is over, we should sum up calmly and seriously, find out the reasons for the mistakes and sum up the lessons. This not only makes up for the lack of study, but also provides reference for future exams. With the "battlefield", the experience of the exam is constantly accumulating and enriching, and the psychology of the exam will become more and more calm. Above, I analyzed the students' behavior, adolescence and learning problems in our school.